Sunday, October 05, 2014

NEW VILLAGE VOICE COLUMN...

...is not at the Village Voice this week. Nor will it be hereafter. Village Voice Media informs me they're cancelling the Rightbloggers column forthwith for budgetary reasons. I swear, when I went by the Voice offices each week to pick up my sacks of Kruggerrands, I thought those malnourished children were some kind of joke. Apparently not. Things is tough in journalism!

Well, six years is a good run. Now it's time to start suffering and write that symphony.

In any event, I had a column ready, so here it is, on my own premises: It's about the Ebola, and how Obama snuck it in America's back door because he hates this fucking country and wants to see it overthrown by radical Islam, which totally rocks.

Have a look, have fun, and if you have comments leave them here. As for next week and the weeks to come, I'll figure something out.

175 comments:

  1. Derelict10:16 PM

    Goddamnit! What's become of my once-beloved Village Voice?!?!

    Roy, put out a damn tip jar--at least for a while.

    I'll click on through to the non-column now. I wonder how many rightbloggers are going to be oh-so-creative and call the disease du jour Obola>?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Derelict10:30 PM

    Nope, no Obola cites. Yet.

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  3. Last Saturday, I spent ten minutes wandering around Columbus Circle in the rain looking for a copy of the "Voice' to read on the 1 Train to 238th St. I didn't find one. Next Saturday, I sha'n't expend the effort.

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  4. Derelict10:32 PM

    American Thinker had yet another rightblogger Ebola expert: Dr. Jason Kissner, identified as "associate professor of criminology at California State University, Fresno," . . .

    Nice to see they're turning to hyper-qualified science, well. . . He does have the word "doctor" in front of his name, so that has to count for something, right? Right!?!?

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  5. Sounds like a good time to buy Roy's novel.

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  6. Criminolgy? Criminy!

    Alternate Take: CSI Cardiovascular System

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  7. Hey, after all these years, I'd toss in a tip.

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  8. I'm not buying it. I think we need a Rightbloggers column more than a Food section... or a report on taxicab wars. Murdoch hasn't bought the VV, has he?

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  9. We only have ourselves to blame for not patronizing the "relaxation therapists" who advertise in the classifieds.

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  10. smut clyde10:41 PM

    I sha'n't expend the effort.
    Well done that man.

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  11. This exchange is getting me all tingly. It could be like the Super Friends!

    https://twitter.com/tbogg/status/518951589013225472

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  12. Derelict10:54 PM

    I've tried a couple, but they rubbed me the wrong way.

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  13. you bastard.

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  14. Ubu Imperator11:03 PM

    Word to that. If the moochers at NRO are shameless enough to fleece the rubes for cruise money, you should be willing to at least let us pick up the cost of a few cans of pork 'n' beans.

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  15. That special pre-new-world-order feeling

    With that special pre-new-world-order smell, too, though I hear unscrupulous tyrants will often spray fake new-world-order smell to fool you into buying an older model without all the safety features and with the odometer rolled back.

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  16. Kevin Hayden11:10 PM

    Maybe Esquire can sneak you in to pair with Charlie Pierce.

    Ah well, now I have no reason left to read the VVoice.

    Good luck in your next adventure, Roy.

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  17. Megalon11:12 PM

    Goddamn, what is it with Professors from Fresno?

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  18. Jane Gagle-Bennett11:13 PM

    Will unsubscribe from the free emails, seriously they will get no more clicks from me.

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  19. Well, at least they're not calling up Joe the Not-Plumber to get his educated opinion.

    Yet.

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  20. Like Doctor Science, he had his first name legally changed to "Doctor."

    "associate professor of criminology at California State University, Fresno,"Wow, no wonder he knows more about Ebola than the CDC and actual Ebola experts. I'm surprised they didn't just grab an adjunct instructor from the Fosdike Upstairs School of Cosmetology and Law, San Bernadino.

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  21. Here you go, not surprised that Day By Day would go there.

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  22. BigHank5311:37 PM

    You've never been there, I guess.

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  23. You're saying there was a certain amount of friction between you, then?

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  24. Spaghetti Lee11:49 PM

    Geez. First HotYetiMilfs.com goes offline, and now this! Dark days on the internet, my friends.

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  25. Megalon11:51 PM

    Just where the fuck are those characters supposed to be? It looks there standing in an abandoned mall or something. And do they usually discuss how much they hate the O-surper while cowboy guy stands and the woman squats by his feet making vaguely porny faces and holding a bottle in a suggestive way... yea, I think it has gotten worse.

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  26. Spaghetti Lee11:54 PM

    I'd say that Jonah Goldberg is resting easier at this news, but that might not be physically possible.

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  27. DocAmazing11:55 PM

    This clears the way for larger things for you. Mr. E.

    I'm thinking Cal State Fresno could use a consultant to advise them on personnel policies...

    ReplyDelete
  28. trizzlor12:00 AM

    The VV column was a Monday morning commute ritual for me that put the whole week in perspective. I hope things are only looking up for you.

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  29. Megalon12:07 AM

    No, and I think I'll keep it that way.

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  30. Jim Smith12:25 AM

    Roy that sucks, I'm with the others - Put up a tip jar, I'd pitch in. I respect the fuck out of your Voice (the Village not so much).

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  31. Aw, geez, Roy! That is so saddening.

    It was a great run. Thanks for navigating us through those fetid swamps and identifying the vectors of right wing mental disease. Who would have believed the horror and blight if you hadn't shown us?

    Hope a good turn comes soon. Remember, we're here to help.

    ReplyDelete
  32. StringOnAStick12:45 AM

    Speaking as a female, every DBD cartoon leaves me feeling vaguely insulted/threatened, but this one cranks it up to creepy-raincoat-dude-on-late-subway-car territory.

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  33. AGoodQuestion1:05 AM

    Before I say anything else, it sucks that the VV are no longer partaking of your services. I look forward to seeing where you go next.

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  34. AGoodQuestion1:09 AM

    Syndicated omniphobe Diana West said "common sense and love of country dictate" that the hot-zone countries all be quarantined, but Obama is "doing nothing" because of "regnant global ideology."


    1. Congratulations to West on pioneering in the language of propaganda. I'm pretty sure "common sense and love of country" will be the preferred RW code for "do what we say or watch America perish" for some time to come.


    2. Somebody's got unrealistic ideas about quarantines. These proposals almost all sound like "Check it out. We do like that Under the Dome show on TV only we got a real big-ass dome for America and some smaller shittier domes for third world countries."

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  35. AGoodQuestion1:17 AM

    Whenever I see Day by Day I'm always blown away by the fact that a few newspapers have actually picked it up. Yeah, latch onto the lamest shit the 'net has to offer. That'll save print.

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  36. Weird Dave1:27 AM

    I know you all are smarter than me and have probably read this at three or four other places already but really? Napalming the villages? Really?

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  37. This is the perfect opportunity to test the wingnut welfare system. It's a given that any member of a typically Liberal-identifying group - Black, Hispanic, Gay, Female, Stand-Up Comic, Rock Star, Actor, Scientist and Combinations of Above - no matter how poor the writing skills and/or thought processes - has a place at the feeding tube. Because, OBVIOUSLY.
    A former liberal blogger? Roy is a shoo-in. The Experiment will continue for as long as need be. Then Roy will reveal himself as an infiltrator. And write about the experience: the Fox appearances, the Caribbean Cruises, the Koch private badminton sessions - things no Liberal has ever seen or even imagined. And the beauty of it is, until that revelation, WE ALONE WILL KNOW.

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  38. Roy now has his own hashtag: #EmployRoy. The 'Bogg was quick on this one.

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  39. smut clyde2:09 AM

    how Obama snuck it in America's back door

    IYKWIMAITYD

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  40. smut clyde2:10 AM

    Yep, you need to stop all flights from Brussels. They could be trying to import sprouts.

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  41. smut clyde2:11 AM

    Kincannon also prides himself on his pro-life values.

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  42. JennOfArk2:16 AM

    You should see what he had to say about Ray Rice beating his girlfriend/wife.

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  43. montag22:35 AM

    Ah, Todd Kincannon, the "exterminate them all" Republican. Have no fear, he's for civilization in such matters:

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  44. montag22:43 AM

    Kincannon has a long history of advocating extermination of those he considers "savages," all in the name of promoting "civilization." He's said much the same about Muslims and American Indians.

    i have no doubt that, eventually, he'll be advocating genocide of everyone who's not a suit-and-tie-wearing Republican. That's where his ilk usually wind up.

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  45. Another Kiwi3:02 AM

    Well DBD made no sense. I suppose the one handed readers will be happy.

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  46. Another Kiwi3:06 AM

    Bad news to lose such a voice at this time. I hope things pick up for you Roy.

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  47. I would buy a compilation of RightBloggers columns.

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  48. To be serious for a second, my condolences but it is their loss.

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  49. John E Williams6:49 AM

    Shit, this sucks so bad. "Budgetary reasons"? I assumed YOU were paying THEM.

    I am deeply sorry about this. It's a loss, in so many ways.

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  50. John E Williams6:52 AM

    This is not only just bad, it mangles and abuses comics language to the point of being a crime. I don't know where to start with how inept this stupid thing is. The Doonesbury riff at the end only exacerbates it.

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  51. Kincannon: "We need to do to the Muslims what our forefathers did to the savages that infested America prior to Christopher Columbus."


    Who's this "we" kemosabe? I suppose this is the sort of Pro-American history lesson they wanna implant in Colorado.

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  52. BigHank537:36 AM

    Roy, you might also take a look at patreon.com. I've mostly seen it used by people drawing webcomics, but it allows monthly subscriptions starting at a dollar a month. A lot of us could come up with four cents a day, and the subscription model means (a) orders of magnitude less begging, and (b) a more predictable income.

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  53. Tracy7:49 AM

    That's an import ban I can get behind.

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  54. Derelict7:51 AM

    Isn't this the anti-Semite site--at least as far as illiterate rightbloggers are concerned?

    ReplyDelete
  55. redoubtagain8:03 AM

    South Carolina--practicing genocide since the 17th century.

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  56. randomworker8:16 AM

    All the best in finding your next venture. As so many others have said...their loss.

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  57. Derelict8:39 AM

    What a weird fantasy land Muir lives in. Obama demanding amnesty for all illegals? Prosecuting states that don't allow all messicans to freely cross the border? Toting illegals around in the presidential limo? No wonder all the people (and women, especially) in DBD look so distorted--Muir's entire world must be one extended acid trip.

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  58. Derelict8:39 AM

    Speaking as a human, every DBD cartoon is insulting.

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  59. BigHank538:58 AM

    It's a raw deal, but I'm sure there was a cheery wave and the salutation, "Tartare for now!"

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  60. glennisw9:02 AM

    At this writing, the Great U.S. Ebola Epidemic of 2014 consists of one guy with Ebola in Dallas,


    The scourge of Ebola is just as terrifying as the rise of the New Black Panthers.

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  61. glennisw9:03 AM

    Yeah, what's up with the half-naked woman clutching the bottle?

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  62. glennisw9:06 AM

    Ugh, please don't tell me.

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  63. drspittle9:12 AM

    Sorry to hear the VV gig has ended, but you're too good a writer to keep down. I agree with others who suggested you implement a monthly subscription fee. Between you and the commenters here, this place is therapy for me (and cheaper than Prozac with no side affects!) You are all brilliant as far as I'm concerned.

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  64. Helmut Monotreme9:51 AM

    Hell yes.

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  65. mortimer20009:51 AM

    This is nuts. Roy is one of the BEST writers on the Internet and the Village Voice axes his Rightbloggers column to save whatever paltry amount they were paying him? The world is fucked up. I've always been expecting someone to give him a full time gig and leave us poor devils in the lurch, and I still do. I don't know how any of this works but it seems like the Rightbloggers column alone would be perfect for Salon, Raw Story, The Nation, and I'm sure more knowledgeable folks could think of a bunch more. We've seen that Roy isn't great on self-promotion so maybe a few emails are in order.

    My old man always told me that the world was unfair, but the fact that Roy Edroso's pearls are limited to us swine while Jonah fucking Goldberg has a syndicated column in 100 national newspapers is proof that, if there is a god, he really hates the shit out of humanity.

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  66. Derelict9:53 AM

    ^^THIS.^^

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  67. tigrismus10:02 AM

    I keep thinking how it's killed fewer Americans than toddlers with guns have, but I guess that just proves how profoundly unserious I am.

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  68. Halloween_Jack10:11 AM

    Welp, there goes my very last reason to look at the Veev, unless I'm suddenly possessed with the burning desire to see what various random NYC ladies (and non-NYC ladies such as Juggalettes) look like with their tops off. Raw Story should pick you up--they've already got TBogg and Amanda Marcotte, plus SEK from LGM.

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  69. Harry Cheddar10:17 AM

    Put the damn Paypal button back up Roy.

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  70. Harry Cheddar10:38 AM

    I just want to know why Sam Elliot and a drunken prostitute were hanging out in a parking garage.

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  71. montag210:40 AM

    The "infested" is worth a dry chuckle. Why, I'll bet he's one of those that think white Europeans are just naturally superior in every way....

    They do have one particular talent. They are exceptionally good at killing people and then making up rationalizations for it.

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  72. Ellis_Weiner10:41 AM

    And a pro-forma, "Well done."

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  73. calling all toasters10:50 AM

    These thing always come in three. First, James Garner dies. Now Roy is downsized. Can Jonah Goldberg on Dancing with the Stars be far behind?

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  74. "Kincannon: "We need to do to the Muslims what our forefathers did to the
    savages that infested America prior to Christopher Columbus."

    Actaully, there are whole intertubes posts claiming that ebola was created by the West to control the indigenous populations that infested Africa . Somewhere in Hell, Jeffrey Amherst is smiling...

    http://www.history.org/Foundation/journal/Spring04/warfare.cfm

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  75. Derelict11:12 AM

    What's frightening about this is that the mainstream media is going along for that ride to the right. We've already gone past the point where established rightwing media cranks are essentially immune to criticism or consequences for saying or publishing the most extreme things (see Limbaugh's slagging of J. Michael Fox, or Pat Buchanan's praise of Hitler as examples). And what was extreme-fringe lunacy (vaccines cause autism, Obama's actually Kenyan) finds its way into polite discussion because "it's out there" and now "needs to be addressed" (which usually means presenting the lunacy in as neutral a manner as possible, thus giving it credence).

    And so our politics doesn't just drift to the right--it marches steadily in that direction.

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  76. Ellis_Weiner11:13 AM

    Speak for yourself, John Alden.

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  77. Ellis_Weiner11:19 AM

    I read a tweet that said, "Dancing With the Stars sounds like the gay version of 'sleeping with the fishes.'" So yes, pls.

    ReplyDelete
  78. Jane Gagle-Bennett11:28 AM

    Just unsubscribed from the Voice's emails and sent them an email telling them why plus "no more clicks for you."

    ReplyDelete
  79. TGuerrant11:30 AM

    the mainstream media is going along for that ride to the right


    And that, to state the bloody obvious, is why Edroso's work is so important. Though he makes it into a lively, witty read, he conducts a clear-sighted and logical weekly analysis of the corrupt and deliberately irrational thought that seeps into major media outlets as accepted fact.

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  80. Matt Jones11:37 AM

    It makes me a horrible person, but I really hope there's an Ebola vaccine and the Agenda 21 nutbars decide it's the "mark of the beast" or some shit.

    ReplyDelete
  81. Cato the Censor11:38 AM

    For what it's worth, I just sent an e-mail to the VV editor saying that they were saps to fire you and demanding that they give you your old job back.

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  82. Roy! I'm so sorry and, frankly, outraged. Where else can the Voice expect to find someone to dredge the abyssal depths of the right wing psyche? I'm disgusted.

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  83. Todd Kincannon, the "exterminate them all" Republican.If you're going to ID Kincannon in particular, you're going to have to be way more specific than that.

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  84. Fake gold watch?

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  85. Looks like he's using some sort of computer program instead of pen and ink and he still sucks.

    Waltz of the Right Wing Paper Dolls is the only way to read that crap without wanting to take a pitchfork to someone.

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  86. Where else can the Voice expect to find someone to dredge the abyssal depths of the right wing psyche?Nowhere. Which I presume is the point.

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  87. StringOnAStick12:12 PM

    I'd go for that, or anything really. This is the best blog I read, period. Roy should be compensated for his skill and for the community he holds together here.

    ReplyDelete
  88. Derelict12:18 PM

    Purchased from a vendor by the Port Authority bus terminal. That's how you know it's a genuine fake!

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  89. Derelict12:23 PM

    But it's tied with toddlers with guns from Liberia, so there's that.

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  90. Derelict12:29 PM

    Completely OT, but I remember reading in pilot Robert Johnson's account of his war experiences about a bombing raid on a bridge in Belgium. He and the rest of his P-47 fighter-bomber squadron were briefed that the buildings surrounding the ends of the bridge was mostly large greenhouses devoted to Brussels sprouts, and so the pilots should avoid hitting those if at al possible.

    Johnson reported that, as they dove on the target, the airplane ahead of him released its bombs a bit early and hit one of the greenhouses, "setting back Brussels sprout production for at least a year." (Of course, having a couple of dozen 500-lbs bombs going off nearby probably broke every pane of glass in every greenhouse within a mile, but such are the tragedies of war.)

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  91. StringOnAStick12:37 PM

    Eugenics for Jesus; the perfect description for the Duggar sacred sperm farm.

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  92. Derelict12:37 PM

    And so it goes in publishing. Particularly in newsprint, management loses track of why people pay to read the publication. So increased profit margins are pursued by shitcanning talented reporters and photographers, and by slashing local coverage in favor of wire-service material.

    That usually drives long-time readers away as they realize they can get the same wire-service crap elsewhere. Revenues fall, leading management to further cut staff. Which leads to further erosion of readership, and subsequent further cuts to staff. (Usually, management bonuses are completely unaffected by this.)

    ReplyDelete
  93. Upon consideration, "help" is the wrong word. Gives off the whiff of charity. I have no qualms about buying physical books and mags that I like. You deserve the same. Not suggesting a subscription model, but some method of fair payment would be totally rightful. You've given us hundreds of magazines' worth of reading pleasure over the years.

    ReplyDelete
  94. gocart mozart1:06 PM

    Freakin' O'Bama! If he's not shoving his thing down our throats, he's sneaking it in our back door!

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  95. On the other hand, the right is losing very traditional Real Americans who believe that you don't disrespect the President, ever.

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  96. Why do I feel like they are canceling Firefly all over again?

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  97. J Neo Marvin1:18 PM

    Now you have to do this simply for the sheer love of it. God help you.

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  98. Rodger French1:33 PM

    The only reason I read the Voice online to begin with. Hope you end up somewhere that appreciates you.

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  99. scottclevenger1:35 PM

    Dr. Kissner is protean -- not only a criminology professor and an expert in epidemiology, but also a board certified psychiatrist who diagnosed America as psychotic for failing to defend unto death the right of a rodeo clown to wear an Obama mask to work.

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  100. Jeezus--so much concentrated poison at once would kill ya, Shakezula. Please reconsider.

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  101. the right is losing very traditional Real AmericansCould you send a few of them to Iowa, Colorado, etc? Because what I'm seeing right now is Republicans' monstrously treasonous behavior being punished by them potentially picking up eight Senate seats.

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  102. what various random NYC ladies (and non-NYC ladies such as Juggalettes) look like with their tops off.


    [Sultrily] "I'm not wearing a hat right now."

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  103. LiveFreeOrWatchTV2:30 PM

    Oh, hell, the Voice went in the tank years ago. The fact that the Voice had Roy for six years must have been some management mistake: "Whoops, we hired someone with talent...how did this happen?" Let's hope he finds a more suitable home. Crossing fingers

    ReplyDelete
  104. Helmut Monotreme2:48 PM

    This is the most beautiful story I have ever read.

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  105. Said through gritted teeth, chomping a cigar: "Them's for all the young kids in America who hadda clean their plates! Dirty Ratzi vegables!"

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  106. [putting on my domestic advice hat]
    If your recollection of Brussels sprouts is soggy over-boiled mush-nuggets, try oven-cooking them laid out on parchment paper in a baking tray sprinkled with olive oil & balsamic vinegar, maybe with pine nuts and bits of prosciutto. I've seen a couple of sprout haters converted this way.

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  107. Inconstant Reader3:35 PM

    Absolutely! I never miss a column, and often shared them on social media. Maybe not often enough.

    ReplyDelete
  108. DocAmazing3:48 PM

    You should meet his brother Henry.

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  109. Halloween_Jack3:48 PM

    Hmmm... I should have been more clear.

    http://youtu.be/fXLYFQef7O8

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  110. redoubtagain3:54 PM

    Our loss, but theirs too. Because they're still going to be (metaphorically) shot at, but without the Edroso Spotter Drone they won't know where the (metaphorical) shells are coming from.

    ReplyDelete
  111. REMONSTER4:08 PM

    Whom is this "Roy" of which you speak? Oh, I see....HIRE THAT MAN!

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  112. Howlin Wolfe4:22 PM

    Sorry you lost the VV gig, Roy. Glad I can still read your musings somewhere on the internet and I already know how to find them.

    ReplyDelete
  113. Gromet5:35 PM

    I worked in New York (and sorta lived there at points) in my early 20s and the Voice was an important part of my Real Education. I'd pick up the paper and find myself suddenly dealing with unanticipated allusions to John Cage, Robespierre, and the War of Jenkins Ear -- and that would just be in a record review. Jesus, that paper. Anyway, I knew Hoberman and Christgau and Hentoff and Greg Tate had all moved on, but when I found Roy I thought: Well thank god they're still doing it over there, there's still a writer who, if I picked it up when I was 22, woulda made me stop and think: Okay, the world is fun, complicated, and it's important we get it right.


    Well, I'm 14-20 years older now (let's keep it vague) and I know more about (thanks in part to the Voice of the 1990s) what the world is, so Roy hasn't been serving that exact same purpose for me, but there's another, equally important one that he has been doing for me. Let's just call it Keeping Tabs on the Bastards. It has been a lot of fun to come here every morning and find them lined up like fish on ice, gutted and cleaned for inspection, their blank eyes in death gazing on the world every bit as uncomprehendingly as they gazed on it in life.


    So thanks for the laughs and the smarts, Roy -- and everyone else here. I'm assuming we will continue to hang out together like this, on some premise (or premises) not radically different, so I won't be too sad. Although I am sad. This is a bad turn.


    Thanks again.

    ReplyDelete
  114. Gromet5:48 PM

    I say no sneaking around -- these rightwing outlets demanding more Republicans in the cabinet are going to have to hire Roy. They really can't afford the appearance of hypocrisy, not with so much at stake -- America teeters on the brink of total destruction! NRO, hire Roy Edroso now!

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  115. Gromet5:53 PM

    Okay, that's a hilarious tweet.

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  116. hellslittlestangel6:21 PM

    My late Sunday nights will not be the same. Nor will the Village Voice.

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  117. cleter6:45 PM

    Enjoy this steaming bowl of dicks, short-sighted Village Voice bean counters.

    ReplyDelete
  118. salvagesalvage6:59 PM

    Fuck the Village Voice, Roy put a PayPal link on the column every Monday and I'll hit it. This has been how I start my Mondays for years now... I DON'T LIKE CHANGE.

    ReplyDelete
  119. Susan of Texas7:32 PM

    I cannot even imagine the suckatude of that cruise. If we had a cruise it would be awesome. Laser tag in the engine room. Pin-a-tail on the Cornerite. (We could sedate them if necessary.)

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  120. Laser tag in the engine room.

    Can we use X-ray lasers?

    ReplyDelete
  121. Smarter than Your Average Bear7:47 PM

    Sorry to hear that Roy - you've sure had it rough these past few years - hope it smooths out for you soon

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  122. Derelict8:04 PM

    I'd go for that, or anything really. This is the best blog I read, period. Roy should be compensated for his skill and for the community he holds together here.

    Quoted because this needs to be said as many times as possible.

    This is one of the few blogs I read, and one of only two I comment at (LGM being the other). The community here--the Alicurati--far surpass any other anywhere I've been on the Web. Few trolls, and everyone witty, intelligent, thinking, and not so sure of their opinions that they're immune to discussion. Roy deserves better treatment from the VV, and all support we can give.

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  123. M. Krebs8:12 PM

    Noooooooo!

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  124. M. Krebs8:14 PM

    Or simply microwaved until cooked-yet-still-crisp and served with a drizzle of olive oil and a little Dijon mustard.

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  125. Derelict8:18 PM

    Wasn't Captain Dallas taken by the alien, partially cocooned, then killed by Ripley with a flame thrower?

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  126. M. Krebs8:20 PM

    Roy could replace Maureen Dowd, Tom Friedman, A. O. Scott, and Alessandra Stanley at the Times with both hands tied behind his back. Let's start a petition!

    ReplyDelete
  127. TGuerrant8:35 PM

    Pétomane Par-Tay! Blowin' the Oldies!

    ReplyDelete
  128. Oh sure--like I've seen a couple of gays converted to being straight through the love of jesus sprinkled with prosciutto.

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  129. billcinsd9:02 PM

    I'm cutting out all my paper dolls
    I wonder which one's gonna try to drive me crazy this time

    I'm cutting out all my paper dolls
    I tried each one but they all, turned out the same,

    I tried each one but they all turned out the same
    I'm gonna tear 'em all up and then I'm gonna throw 'em away,

    ReplyDelete
  130. susanoftexas9:24 PM

    Just don't point it at Jonah Goldberg.

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  131. In the novelization.

    They supposedly filmed it, but cut it from the final release.

    (Or so I recall.)

    ReplyDelete
  132. I'm gonna draw a paper doll
    To stimulate my groin
    A doll made with paper, ink and steel
    And the dirty lib'ral guys
    With their dirty lib'ral lies
    Will have to play with dollies that are real

    She'll look just like Ann Coulter
    She'll be sure to rock my world
    I'd rather draw a paper doll

    That I can call my own
    Than deal with a scary real-life girl!

    ReplyDelete
  133. Derelict9:43 PM

    It was filmed, and you can get it in the director's cut. And I must say that I thought the director's cut was much better than what was released to theaters.

    ReplyDelete
  134. which usually means presenting the lunacy in as neutral a manner as possible, thus giving it credence

    Like back in 1995, when, just after the OKC bombing, ABC's "Nightline" invited militia members on and politely asked them to state their grievances against the government.

    Only it's SO MUCH WORSE now.

    ReplyDelete
  135. You and Haystack are doing God's work to rehab the image of a much maligned vegetable!

    ReplyDelete
  136. Magatha11:01 PM

    Hell, Cordelia Chase had this thing nailed way back in 1999, in Sunnydale, trying to stop the mayor from becoming a demon by attacking him with germs ('cause the mayor hated germs): "No! No, we'll get a box with the Ebola virus and, and - or it doesn't even have to be real, we can just get a box that says
    Ebola on it and, um, chase him - with the box...." But they all laughed at her. Cordelia was really kind of a visionary. Does anyone interview her? No! Well, she's dead, but still.

    ReplyDelete
  137. LookWhosInTheFreezer11:05 PM

    Maybe Mother Jones, Slate, The Onion?

    Sorry to hear this Roy. Hopefully you will find your way to something even bigger. Satirical, point-and-laugh commentary on wingnuts feels like our only hope for Democracy.

    ReplyDelete
  138. Ubu Imperator11:11 PM

    There's a place in my town that flash fries brussels sprouts as an appetizer. Even if you are an atheist, taking your first bite of one is like touching the face of God.

    ReplyDelete
  139. Derelict11:16 PM

    Hmmm....The Alicubi Cruise around Manhattan to benefit Roy and the blog. We could feed the boilers with unsold copies of the Voice.

    ReplyDelete
  140. AGoodQuestion11:25 PM

    Hmm. I don't know. The NYT might need to hold onto Stanley if they want to keep the clueless racial profiling coming.

    ReplyDelete
  141. AGoodQuestion11:49 PM

    Honestly, I don't know how long it's been since I looked at a non-Roy feature in the Voice.

    ReplyDelete
  142. Meanie-meanie, tickle a person11:51 PM

    Me either. I like bills. And I bet Ed does too...

    ReplyDelete
  143. Meanie-meanie, tickle a person11:54 PM

    Worse, a virtual fake watch. Worst, a *real* digital gold watch...

    ReplyDelete
  144. Meanie-meanie, tickle a person11:57 PM

    Cranial strap-ons only...

    ReplyDelete
  145. Meanie-meanie, tickle a person12:23 AM

    As a man once said, "make it so"...

    ReplyDelete
  146. Meanie-meanie, tickle a person12:24 AM

    Hey, I'll go for anything that'll make my fur stand up...

    ReplyDelete
  147. Meanie-meanie, tickle a person12:28 AM

    It's about the Ebola, and how Obama snuck it in America's back door

    I thought only Aids came in that way...

    ReplyDelete
  148. Pope Zebbidie XIII5:32 AM

    We had to tie him down and beat him about the head to get him to take money last time.

    ReplyDelete
  149. smut clyde5:57 AM

    You may know him as Ed Roso.

    ReplyDelete
  150. smut clyde5:59 AM

    D'Souza is on the case.

    ReplyDelete
  151. smut clyde6:01 AM

    The War on Sprouts is never OT.

    ReplyDelete
  152. Derelict7:48 AM

    May he be its first victim. Or at least contract a fine case of explosive diarrhea that will convince him he's got it.

    ReplyDelete
  153. Derelict7:52 AM

    And thus starts the dreaded bluefish conversation:


    Person A: "I don't like bluefish."
    Person B: "Well, you've never had it the way I make it!"


    It's as predictable as sunrise.

    ReplyDelete
  154. Like jonah has been mobile since he became nubile.

    ReplyDelete
  155. TLC had them on yesterday for the birth of #18; mother and daughter are doing well, apparently. I'd love to know . . . no, I wouldn't.

    ReplyDelete
  156. robert10149:17 AM

    The Voice management apparently made a decision years ago that they would, in every case where budgetary concerns required thrift, cast out any person of distinctive talent or acuity who might still be working for them. After all, when you're determined to run a penny-saver, what's the point in publishing interesting, funny, smart, and informative editorial content?

    ReplyDelete
  157. Helmut Monotreme9:45 AM

    Yeah, I have bad manners, so if I'm person A my response is "I've tried enough bluefish (or brussels sprouts) to know that I don't like them, so the sooner you quit trying to get me to eat that food which I have already told you that I find revolting, the less time we will both waste."

    ReplyDelete
  158. Derelict10:01 AM

    So long as it comes with a Certificate of Authenticity, it's worth it.

    ReplyDelete
  159. TGuerrant10:05 AM

    Son of Hindenburg - oh the inanity!

    ReplyDelete
  160. TGuerrant10:08 AM

    A fast run through the Insinkerator with a hearty flow of water does wonders for them, too!

    ReplyDelete
  161. Cordelia was really kind of a visionary.Oh, well played.

    ReplyDelete
  162. D. Sidhe12:45 PM

    Ugh, what a useless decision. I get used to watching papers get rid of excellent, make-us-better-citizens content based on step-in-the-wrong-direction, shortsighted penny decisions, but it doesn't mean I have to like it.

    The money is one thing, I'm down with Roy getting paid as close to what he's worth as we can come, but the worst part is definitely your loss of a larger audience, and the loss of you to a larger audience. The very least they could do is direct people to here for a couple weeks while they explain they were stupid enough to drop you.

    Sorry, Roy. This is a letdown. Tip jar? I lack such newfangled things as credit cards, and paypal, but I can probably borrow one. I'd love to see you keep doing the rightblogger look-in longer formats , when you can find time. If we can help you make some time, even better.

    ReplyDelete
  163. whetstone2:38 PM

    Late to the comments this time, but seconded. Alicublog is basically the only place I'm a regular commenter. For just the cost of a cup of coffee, I could maintain my sanity, which is also what I buy coffee for.

    ReplyDelete
  164. whetstone2:40 PM

    Hey. I was going to say "Roy, have you pitched Raw Story?" I like it when the internet does things for me. IT'S BECOMING SENTIENT.

    ReplyDelete
  165. Bruce Garrett3:39 PM

    Put a PayPal (or whatever) tip jar up and I'll chip in. Gosh I'm really sorry to read about this. You're one of the best.

    ReplyDelete
  166. So sad that the Sadlies lost all their images.
    ~

    ReplyDelete
  167. realinterrobang5:14 PM

    Speaking as someone who just got restructured out of a job in possibly the stupidest example of corporate face-spiting I've ever seen, I feel your pain, my condolences, and best of luck finding a new gig.

    ReplyDelete
  168. AlanInSF7:47 PM

    If it's good enough for BSpence, it's double-good enough for me. Do it!

    ReplyDelete
  169. AlanInSF2:03 AM

    I was gonna say the Staten Island Ferry, 'cause it's free.

    ReplyDelete
  170. Derelict6:53 AM

    Sorry to read about YOU getting it in the neck, too. Bad times all around, but here's hoping some other, smarter company snaps you up.

    ReplyDelete
  171. mrstilton6:37 PM

    YES.


    This is the really annoying thing about Edroso. He won't put out a tip jar, but doesn't fathom that it is not a question of "tips". It's a question of paying our subscriptions for top-quality writing. I don't feel like it might be nice to toss the author a quarter every now and then, I feel guilty taking value without compensating its creator.


    Long-time readers will remember that one time Roy desperately needed a penis transplant, couldn't afford it because he'd spent all his money shipping copies of A Child's Garden of Alinsky to poor Iraqi bairns, yet wouldn't even stick up a PayPal icon.


    YO ROY: Harlan Ellison might be the world's biggest flaming bunghole but when he said PAY THE WRITER he was right. So let us do it, man!

    ReplyDelete
  172. Jmaharry3:34 PM

    This is bad news, but I am hoping you can turn this into a positive. Perhaps a new platform that gives you more visibility. I bet Media Matters would be interested, if they're not consumed by jealous suspicions that what they struggle so obviously to achieve you pull off with such concision and wit.

    ReplyDelete