Paging Men's Rights den-mother Dr. Mrs. Ole Perfesser:
So, if it’s okay to subway shame men, is it okay to slut-shame women? Slut-shaming is “defined by many as a process in which women are attacked for their transgression of accepted codes of sexual conduct.” So now men are attacked. Why is one form of sexism okay and the other not? And don’t give me the crap about the patriarchy. If you shame men in this way, you are a nasty sexist who deserves contempt...Seats, lady. These guys are taking up extra seats. They -- oh, what's the use; their persecution mania trumps common sense every time. Some classic DMOP Mothering the MRAs routines here and here. I doubt anyone will top -- oh, hold on, here's Alex Jones:
THE TRUTH ABOUT “MANSPREADING”Please, can we maybe take one or two places that used to be all-male, and to which we don't really want to go, and let these guys have them back? They clearly need a safe space.
War on "manspreading" shows why feminism is becoming increasingly irrelevant
Taking up too much space on the subway should lead to corporal punishment. This is a huge pet peeve of mine.
ReplyDeleteA few years back, I was riding a near-empty subway train and some d-bag was standing in front of the door. I gave him a body check when I exited the train, hoping he would follow me onto the platform. I was on my way to the dojo, so I figured slapping him silly would be a decent warmup.
Also, it's axiomatic that there is always room in a subway car, no matter how crowded it looks. People tend to bunch up near the doors, but there is always room in the middle of the car. I'm usually traveling to the end of the line in the Bronx, so I can stand in the middle of the car, having no need to exit. I can't tell you folks the number of times I've bellowed at people to move their asses to let people in.
ReplyDelete"This is a huge pet peeve of mine."
ReplyDeleteDon't come to DC and ride the Metro, then. You'll go fucking nuts with the door-hogging that goes on there.
I red all that McSorley's content, and avidly, but without sympathizing (over the long run) with the anti-lady-entryists.
ReplyDeleteI do disapprove of "manspreading" on our buses and subways. Arguments abound ... At risk of exposing oneself: if you can't air your balls out at home or in semblance of privacy -- and I make an analogy to your views -- then might not you better stay at home awhile, eh?
Many of the posts over there are about the unattractiveness of female land whales, so you can expect the pushback to involve men flashing their testicles and declaring he subway car the "He Man Woman Haters Club"
ReplyDeleteThe comments to Dr. Helen's post complain that manspreading is:
ReplyDelete- no big deal because fat women
- not as bad as fat families at Costco
- another plot by the government to control people
- only enforced against decent white guys
- a thing because women focus on men's dicks
- a slippery slope that will lead to Islamic slavery
- designed to force men to be effeminate
- an attack on white privilege
And the most obvious response of course:
- fat black women are worse!
You know you need a better class of reader when the Start working at home and make good money! spam is the most intelligent comment in the thread.
Wow, you actually read the comments? Can we nominate you for canonization yet? Think of all those martyred brain cells.
ReplyDeleteFirst they came for the Senate pool skinny dippers but I was not a Senate pool skinny dipper, so I said nothing.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2015/01/senate-women-secret-history-113908.html#ixzz3O4aEA4wb
As long as we're airing our transit grievances...
ReplyDeleteOn the commuter train I ride from Chicago to its western suburbs, particularly stupid people have taken to plopping their asses down on the steps leading to the upper-level seating, despite several seats being available up there. When you ask to get through, they look at you as if you've told them they have severe halitosis.
Also, door-hogging is still the order of the sday on the Chicago L.
Well yeah, if you work at home, you can avoid all the fat, penis-obsessed, sexist, Islamic-slavery-craving, anti-white harlots on the public transportation system.
ReplyDeleteWhen Instacracker splays his legs, you can hear an echo.
ReplyDeleteI've got a knack for getting through those blockages- it's a combination of a fierce demeanor, sufficient body mass, and a knack for finding a path around/between the dumbfucks.
ReplyDeleteAnother champion for Women's Rights chimes in that slut shaming is also equivalent to disclosing CEO salaries. They couldn't possibly be taking a useful phrase and subjecting it to horrible analogies until it has absolutely no meaning? Right? I mean... that never happens. http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/fox-news-kennedy-slut-shaming-companies
ReplyDeleteIt's all about inconveniencing others in order to make oneself feel like a bigshot. You may be too chickenshit to tell your boss off, but by gum, you can inconvenience some poor single mother who's trying to juggle her baby and her purse.
ReplyDelete"i've always admired your tart honesty and ability to be personally offended by broad social trends."
ReplyDelete--seymour skinner to edna krabappel, but also apparently alex jones, dr. mrs. ole perfesser, etc etc etc...
A related transit blockage drives me nuts: people have started checking their text messages at the bottom of the escalator. It should be legal to punch them.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, move to the side of the station. It's like ten steps away.
The middle of the car on the red line is like some sort of undiscovered country. Actually, I wonder how much of it is due to DC having a lot of inexperienced riders who are nervous about missing their stops. Ha ha, no. Probably just assholes.
ReplyDeleteMaybe the guys with legs splayed are hoping some sexy thang will sit on their knee(s)? Maybe a sexy guy, or (heh) overweight woman will do the honors.
ReplyDelete- a thing because women focus on men's dicks
ReplyDeleteEspecially those ugly, lesbian* feminists who are just angry that no Reel Man will bang them.
*The kind of lesbians that still (strangely) covet men like the commenters at wingnut blogs even though they don't know it.
Put center armrests in all the seats. Next!
ReplyDeleteI did quite a bit of bus/subway riding when I lived in Chicago in '67/68, and there's definitely a contact sport aspect to it at certain times of the day.
ReplyDeleteNot necessarily people-conveyance-related, but one of my pets peeves is obliviousness in the middle of any sort of traffic pattern. Grocery store aisles are one. Can you be so engrossed in the label on that can of beans that you don't realize you're blocking the highway, and I have to practically ram you to get your attention? Do your daydreaming before you come to the store...
ReplyDeleteI'm a non-small female who sometimes just tries to take up no space at all. I have sweetly told folks that the free pap smear was offered in the next car. They weren't any of them women. It's probably my non-smallness that lets me get away with this. I should stop bullying men but you see they start with me by wearing clothes and having faces. If they didn't do that plus the yawning knee thing we'd be all hunky-dory and safe as houses.
ReplyDeleteWhat, and lose all of that space? Fie on thee!
ReplyDeleteOh, hell yes! Seeing two people stand side-by-side on the escalator pisses me off. Really, people, the left is the "passing lane" on the escalator.
ReplyDeleteIsn't manspreading basically what Chris Christie does when he sits down?
ReplyDeleteDuring my first few weeks in New York, before I got the hang of the subway, I was off-balance when the train lurched out of the station and I fell in some dude's lap.
ReplyDeleteHe was quite nice about it.
DMOP must really be feeling the heat from the Gamergater/Junior MRA embrace of Christina Hoff Sommers.
ReplyDeleteAlso not people-conveyance-related, but boy does it bug me when people grocery shop by towing their cart along behind them, you know, just fingertips on the front of the cart, and the poor cart swerves around behind them because obviously it can't steer itself, and I'm thinking: hey, put both hands on the push bar and push the damn cart in front of you where you can see it. I suspect these people do not wish to be identified as regular, run of the mill grocery shoppers. You know, they're all, "Unaccustomed as I am to the hurly-burly of the marketplace, I must surely be forgiven for not quite understanding how these odd little merchandise-conveying trolley contraptions work, so I shall just tug it along and hope it follows me, and fuck all of the rest of y'all." Other than that, though, I am pretty easy-going in the supermarket. I just go around calling any vegetable, calling it by name. They respond to me.
ReplyDeletecomments from the linked sites make even the most annoying tumblr user like reasonable (i have seen a lot of misguided stuff on tumblr)
ReplyDeletei have seen tumblr people taking pictures of an raging at males with their legs in relatively narrow v's
ReplyDeleteOh man, the McSorley's essay is priceless. Its whole premise is that the place has refused to change. Woof!
ReplyDeleteIt so happens I have clear memories of the place circa 1995. By then women were allowed in for 25 years but at least it still treated them poorly. I was a wide-eyed 20something goofball and out with a lady in that vicinity in '95 and decided to impress her with the age of the place (which I'd been to a couple times before with the men). Well, they made us stand for 20 minutes despite open chairs and then let us sit for 40 minutes but never took an order. They took orders from other people at our table, but not us. She was not only female but Latina, ya see, and we got an epic snub for it. Later that year or '96 I was out with a larger, diverser coed group and I tried to warn them off but ended up there again with a similar result.
Now, I was in NYC last week and poked my head into this bar for the first time since 1997, and as much as I had mixed feelings about the place back then, I felt sorry for its loss now. It was all cleaned up and sunny -- the doors wide open, the tables packed with families wearing brightly-colored ski jackets, not a single cigarette going nor anyone over age 50. Where were the old ruined men? Why didn't the waiter look surly? Why was there a fucking toddler running across the room in a cookie monster hat? Jesus. That's change.
So that "some things never change" essay is 100% fantasy. It would have been 50% fantasy in '95, sure, but you have to be reeeeeaaal comfortable with cognitive dissonance to write "some things never change" about fucking McSorley's now.
AHAHAA!!!! I just looked again and here's how that essay ends: Sticking steadfastly to tradition: the old McSorley’s way. / ***A great deal of this information was retrieved from the McSorley’s website. Visit the site, then head to the East Village for a pint! Hahaha, writer, you big dummy!
OH FFS: Now I just read the "author bio" -- Age: 20-something Location: New York Passion: History
There's no way to satirize this better than it already has been by itself.
I have always wondered what those knees-out dudes are up to. I know how much room the equipment takes up -- not THAT much. I also know it is not comfortable to sit slouched and nearly in a split, so you are inconveniencing yourself. And if you want to sit that way until someone asks you to shift your knee over -- wtf are you pretending it is impossible or you don't hear them? It is so deeply weird. What is the mental state?
ReplyDeleteI have a similar "wtf" when there's two honchos at work who decide to have their conversation in a popular doorway or, say, blocking the coffee machine. I slow down, I loiter, I am standing right there with an empty mug -- there is no way I am not encompassed in your peripheral vision, buddy, and I also already know you are the Senior Executive Vice President of Money and I am not, so what are you achieving by pretending other people don't exist? This is weird behavior. You are weird.
Given a chance to restore some chivalry to the world -- "Of course, ma'am, I'll shift my knee so that you may sit" -- these idiots will go with "But my balls are so big!" every single time.
ReplyDeleteOTOH, fear the too-empty car.
ReplyDeleteYou'd think that the Nice Guys who populate the dignified MRA cavalry in all its chivalry would appreciate this modest effort to make gentlemen out of barn-reared jerkoffs.
ReplyDeleteOr they can keep getting pissy when someone politely suggests that their balls aren't the size of grapefruits and that they're basically just trying to mark their territory like a dog. Can't have both, guys.
As a longtime CTA user my biggest complaint is people who don't move to the back of the bus, yet expect you to push around them to get to the back at rush hour Or, even dumber: people who move 3/4 of the way back but refuse to ascend the stairs to the very back, because... I have no idea. I've been skipped by "full" buses because someone was like "I'll go this far, but no further."
ReplyDeleteI bike to work a lot more now than I used to. That exposes you to more dangerous forms of commuting rudeness, but it's not as oppressive as that on the CTA.
Grocery stores make me claustrophobic for this reason. I'm a lot calmer now that can I do most of my shopping in small big-city neighborhood grocers.
ReplyDeletePlease, can we maybe take one or two places that used to be all-male, and to which we don't really want to go, and let these guys have them back?
ReplyDeleteTo hell with that! McSorley's is a great place to bring a date with a good sense of humor and a high tolerance for poor housekeeping. Hell, I'm overdue for a "lost afternoon"- last time I went on a bender there, I received an emergency call from my boss and had to high-tail it up to the Bronx- thankfully, I had plenty of time to sober up on the "4" train.
A quick sniff is enough to warn you if there's an unsanitary condition. Many's the time I've taken a post last-call ride. I'm no stranger to seeing the money train go by, or to watching the pressure-washing of the subway stations.
ReplyDeleteWhy, yes, I like my beer... why do you ask?
Did you ever pop into the Burp Castle down the street from McSorley's? It billed itself as "the temple of beer worship" run by the "Brewist monks", and specialized in Belgian beers. They had the best mural on the wall. My other go-to place was the "Sly Fox" in the Ukrainian National Home, which was one of the few places in the city to get Żubrówka vodka.
ReplyDeleteGlut shaming...
ReplyDeleteGo ahead and spread 'em, boys, but God help you if Ole Mrs. Perfesser catches you with your undies peeking out over your belt.
ReplyDeleteYes! I did not actually get a beer at McSorley's last week -- just looked in, then walked to Burp Castle. It was closed, alas, but still in business -- that is pleasing. Do the monks still shush the crowd when it gets too loud?
ReplyDeleteMy friend has a great time at Ukrainian bars when Klitschko fights and she brought me to her favorite on Dec 30th but it was desolate, and without wall-to-wall Ukrainians we decided it would not be as fun so did not stay. I will alert her to Sly Fox. We hit Veselka for our pierogi needs...
My main places back in olden days were the Village Idiot and Chumley's to the West (both gone), and Lucy's and Doc Holliday's to the East -- both still there. The bartenders at Doc's liked me so I rarely paid for beer there, but Lucy's was objectively better; checking them out for the first time in 17 years, I noticed everyone in Doc's was still 23, so I steered clear. But Lucy was still behind her bar and somehow she looked younger now.
Yes, when Christie sits around the office, he sits around the office.
ReplyDeleteTip your waitresses, they're working hard for you.
Some classic DMOP othering
ReplyDeleteFixed. ('Cause only subhumans ride public transit anyway.)
War on "manspreading" shows why feminism is becoming increasingly irrelevant
ReplyDeleteThe real takeaway is that Alex Jones is becoming increasingly irrelevant. Here's a guy who has crackpot theories about a global network of sinister operatives that are controlling everything, and he's bitching about people telling jerks to not be so rude... what a comedown!
Also, I've been laughing so much about the Sounds of Sodomy kerfuffle, I have to repurpose S&G:
ReplyDeleteAnd the words of a prophet are written on some dudebro's balls, telling all.
People, this guy's a d-bag."
Doc Holliday's is awesome. One of the bartenders was pouring shots down patrons' gullets, and she stopped when she got to my baby brother's friend and told him, "I don't think you're old enough."
ReplyDeleteThey are saving room for cats.
ReplyDeletehttp://savingroomforcats.tumblr.com/
If I coveted men like the commenters at wingnut blogs I'd be pretending to be a lesbian as well.
ReplyDeleteAnd those bitches in HR.
ReplyDeleteWhat bugs me more on the NYC subways is people standing in the doorways and impeding the flow in and out of the cars. These jerks are invariably men.
ReplyDeleteIf the presence of a "passing lane" doesn't stop people from obstructing the highway where such a lane is legally mandated, why on earth would anyone expect this rule to apply on an escalator where it's merely (un)common courtesy?
ReplyDeleteCommonCommunist courtesy, amirite??
ReplyDeleteI like to lay a pair of skis along a whole bench while I sit across and block the aisle with my legs. This makes me an icon for freedom, although I'm too modest to say so.
ReplyDeleteAh, BBBB--you're bringing back memories for me of when I worked the overnight shift at WPIX. There's nothing like riding the subway at 2-, 3- or 4AM. (Although back then (the late '70s and early '80s) the shuttle to Penn Station stopped at 1AM, which left me the choice of calling a cab or walking from 42nd to Penn Station. Mid-town is a very different place at 2AM!)
ReplyDelete"You're just the kind of audience we love. If you don't bother us, we won't bother you..."
ReplyDeleteLook. Here's an apple. Notice how it's sort of round, maybe red, grows on trees? Okay. Now, here's a wind-up alarm clock. These things are completely identical, and to prove it, I want YOU to take a bite of the alarm clock.
ReplyDeleteWhat woman isn't turned on by the site of some guy airing his junk in public? Probably only the lesbians, and even they find it nigh on irresistible. Or at least Rush Limpdick tells me so.
ReplyDeleteThe plumbing aisle at Lowe's is the ashram of the flummoxed. I've been hypnotized there many times, but i try to huddle as close to where I think the part i need will materialize.
ReplyDeleteSome others, I have noticed, practice the "prayer of immensity" hoping to absorb and process all possible part locations by standing everywhere at once.
You really shouldn't do this on the same aisle as the cast iron black pipe.
Common human decency? Fuck you, loser!
ReplyDelete"The phrase "slut shaming" usually refers to criticizing a woman for
ReplyDeletedressing or behaving in an overtly sexual way and is sometimes used to
blame victims of sexual assault. The panel did not elaborate on how this
compared to the Dodd-Frank rule requiring transparency from companies
on their CEO-to-worker pay ratio."
Well OBVIOUSLY, if we were wearing the S.E. Cupp Memorial Eyeglasses Of Wisdom like Kennedy is, we wouldn't need an explanation, we would just KNOW...
Barn-reared would be an improvement. I'm pretty sure these guys are the product of skinner boxes.
ReplyDeleteSo, what would you call a "squash"? I hate that name.
ReplyDeleteJust watched the two hour premier of "Agent Carter" last night, as Peggy tries to save the world while fighting post- WWII entrenched sexism of the "Hey, Doll... nice gams, get me a cuppa coffee after yer done doing the filing" variety. DMOP and her pals would LOVE the guys on that show.
ReplyDeleteAt least they're not eating dog!!!
ReplyDeleteMy wife and I ate at the restaurant there once (1989?). It was wonderful.
ReplyDeleteThere were no Eastern European restaurants where we lived, save Krakovia and The Orient Express in Chapel Hill, but they were a lot more expensive than the Ukrainian National Home.
Chris Christie puts the speculum in proctology.
ReplyDeleteWomen's rights = being treated decently, getting paid fairly
ReplyDeleteMen's rights = acting like a drunken fratboy in public
Ireland's having elections, I take it?
ReplyDeleteThis is assuming that Alex Jones was ever relevant.
ReplyDeleteAny place that has cats has a mark in its favor with me.
ReplyDelete"Gosh, I guess all that testosterone has damaged your hearing as well as your brain."
ReplyDeleteIt's kind of funny to me that they bring up slut-shaming and fat-shaming as if that's supposed to silence people. Those guys LOVE shaming women for being fat or attractive (or merely present) and every other column by the Dr Mrs is how wronged they are by PC rules not allowing them to shame, they don't get to pretend it's bad now that there's a relatively innocuous campaign to get people to not take up 3 seats on mass transit. And please, men's righters moaning about this campaign, never ever talk about chivalry again.
ReplyDelete"OW! MY TEETH!" - Jonah G. on his fourth try
ReplyDeleteWith a wistful theme song about the green, green grass of Ireland: Sod O' Me Dreams, sung by by the lovely Connie Lingus.
ReplyDeleteBased on my own past experiences with heterosexual roommates knockin' boots, I doubt that the sounds of sodomy are any louder or more energetic than PIV.
ReplyDeleteNow it all makes sense!
ReplyDeleteJESUS you people are making me miss NYC.
ReplyDeleteSocial dominance is a pretty weird thing, when it comes right down to it.
ReplyDeleteWhat are we, animals?
the ashram of the flummoxed
ReplyDeleteI've found my new favorite phrase.
If you ever get nostalgic for oldstyle boozeterias, rent/stream Trees Lounge.
ReplyDeleteI am not actually a violent person, but the first time I encountered manspreading--on a Denver bus when I was quite tired--I cannot tell you how tempted I was to boot the young dude in the junk.
ReplyDeleteMost grocery stores don't bother me, but there's one in town that is just a cavernous hangar of terrible. I think there's something about the fluorescent lights or the excessive clutter and noise but that place just gives me an insta-headache.
ReplyDeleteSQWARSH.
ReplyDeleteAt least we've (mostly) given up marking our territory with piss.
ReplyDeleteHarold?
ReplyDeleteIn CT and a small part of NY, there's Stew Leonard's grocery stores. The stores are laid out like a maze so that you MUST walk past every product in the store.
ReplyDeleteWhen I lived in CT, I'd go to Stew's for meat because they had the most amazing cuts that were as close as you could get to carving it off the cow yourself. Otherwise, Stew's was worth driving extra miles to avoid because dragging your ass through the entire store with periodic road blocks caused by people stopping to take in the Zen qualities of a can of tomato paste just made it pure torture.
Is it responsible to speculum? It's irresponsible not to!
ReplyDeleteDoc Holliday's is still in business? Many's the time back in the day I had it poured down my gullet there. And I don't mean semen! (winks)
ReplyDeleteI never, ever went inside Burp Castle. Cherry Tavern was way cheaper.
Say! Update! My friend informs me Sly Fox IS the favorite she took me to (where we didn't stay cuz it was dead). Her Klitschko location is different -- a place called Ukrainian Sports Club. Jesus I miss New York.
ReplyDeleteAs long as there's a buck to be made by selling improbable conspiracy theories that pander to the worst prejudices of America's most resentful ignoramuses, Alex Jones will be relevant. He's every bit as relevant to politics in the USA today as those people who killed cats for being the servants of the devil were in the time of the black death.
ReplyDeleteI'll admit that I sometimes sit that way on public transit* if the subway is mostly empty, because it's relaxing/comfortable for me. Also because a lot of the times when I take the subway I'm hammered or it's early in the morning and I'm heading to the airport. That sort of thing.
ReplyDeleteBut if there's people around, forget it. I'm a good boy.
*MARTA represent, y'all.
Fuck, Roy.
ReplyDeleteNext they're gonna pass a law keeping us from marking our territories with pee. I guess you'll be happy then, huh??
~
Now that manspreaders have been dealt with, can we move on to the it's showtime kids? They literally must be stopped.
ReplyDeleteIf your election lasts more than four oh forget it.
ReplyDeletean ability to snake a path around/between the dumbfucks.Have you considered a career in politics?
ReplyDeleteDamn you BBB - I'm at work and just went to that site - I'm trying to constrain myself :)
ReplyDeleteReading my extra-drunk writing style sixteen hours later, I find it confusing and inelegant.
ReplyDeleteIt helps if you address them more personally. Like, "What's up, butternut?" "Yo, calabaza, lookin' good!" "Hey, acorn, good to see you're still around." All you have to say to make the pumpkins turn oranger is "Ooh, pie!" But be careful. If you pass the pumpkins and whisper "Ooh, Boehner!" they will launch themselves at you. Messy. "Cleanup in the produce section!"
ReplyDeletehttp://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/fox-news-kennedy-slut-shaming-companies
ReplyDeleteAnd yet, far more worthy of publication than anything Jonah the Fail has ever committed to page or screen.
ReplyDelete[Big] Chickenman...He's everywhere! He's everywhere!
ReplyDeleteThe Right loves to take a phrase used by the Left, and turn it backwards, inside out, or simply repurpose it in some mystifying manner. They then feel all creative and backslap each other for having showed us, by golly. We're never quite sure what it is they showed us, but I don't suppose it really matters, because they don't know either, so the Universe stays in balance...
ReplyDeleteAssholes.
ReplyDeleteThat's not as annoying as the ones who stop dead in the train door as they're entering or exiting. "Getting off the train now, LOL ;-)"
ReplyDeleteDie.
Fingers crossed for the Million Manspreaders March. Angry mens can come from all over the nation to NYC and protest the attempt to make men sit like girly-girls by doing the splits on the subway. I will be there, selling "I spread 'em like a man in NYC" t-shirts.
ReplyDeletePeople who stand in front of the back doors of the bus, especially when there are empty seats piss me off.
ReplyDeleteSo do people who feel they absolutely must bring their 200-pound SUV-sized strollers (containing 9 pounds of baby and 100 pounds of incidentals) on the bus, thus either blocking the aisle or taking up half the handicap seats (which fold up to allow wheelchair access, but the Breeder Brigade uses 'em too).
I have cerebral palsy, and while I'm pretty mobile and walk independently, it's about 100x easier for me to get off the front of even a level-access city bus than off the back (especially since at a lot of bus stops, the back door seems to be magically over a curb cut, grr), and I hate having to try to slalom around one of those fucking strollers.
What ever happened to the folding kind? My parents had a folding stroller that could hold a five-year-old, for pity's sake; they do exist.
/rant
As usual it is interesting to watch the wingnuts suddenly give a shit about people they normally despise. People from NYC, the French...
ReplyDelete"Those guys LOVE shaming women for being fat or attractive (or merely present)"
ReplyDeleteTHAT is the comment of the year! Way To Go!
A friend who lived downstairs from a gay (male) couple complained to me that they were "more ... vigorous" and kept her awake at night.
ReplyDeleteThat's why I carry a purse-sized bottle of Febreeze.
ReplyDeleteOh Lord! Protect us from the sounds of sodomy,
ReplyDeleteThose sicko abnormals and their actions done audibly,
Who disgust and offend with their wanton mad slobbery.
Have they no morals? No respect or no modesty?
Those yelpers, those barkers, these sounders of sodomy?
(I hear some of them do it even with broccoli!)
They’re low and they’re base, filthy subhuman oddity,
And we all know for a fact that they’re at it constantly,
Those grunters and gaspers and their sounds of sodomy.
Why can’t they have sex like us procreators do commonly?
We maketh a child and do it quite modestly,
And no rooter of bums can maketh a progeny.
So begone! You sickos and your sounds of sodomy!
Away with perversions and your sexual novelty!
Enough of this congress done loudly and sloppily!
Enough with the sin! Enough with the comedy!
You brayers, you grunters with your guttural prosody
You hedonist honkers, you sounders of sodomy.
RAH:
ReplyDelete“A dying culture invariably exhibits personal
rudeness. Bad manners. Lack of consideration for others in minor
matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant
than is a riot.”
Combine that with America's "late imperial" wealth inequality, and...we're fucked.
One of the reasons I found Mad Men unwatchable.
ReplyDeleteWell, if it is the plumbing aisle they can also be fluxed and flanged.
ReplyDeleteYou got that right. Some comments "have been reported" and you have to click them "to read them anyway." I clicked one and got, "I made $80/hr working from home my first week!" and thought, "Okay, NOW you're talkin'!"
ReplyDeleteLast time I was in NY and had to shoulder past idiots in the door, I thought of "Don't stand in the doorway/Don't block up the hall," and realized that that was probably written while Dylan lived in NY, and that's what he was talking about.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you about the giant monster strollers. Santa Monica is full of them, pushed around by too-slim moms in Lululemon gear, blocking store aisles and restaurants.
ReplyDeleteI used to drink at the Blue and Gold on, what was it, 4th street? It was NOT a frat bar in 1976. You could get a short beer and a shot for $1.50.
ReplyDeleteI went into McSorley's in 1979 and after downing a couple of they house beers (was it light and dark?) I used the bathroom. I still wake up screaming when I dream about it.
ReplyDeleteWell, if they were partying with Tina (i.e. crystal meth), then yeah, I could see that.
ReplyDeleteThat's funny. I got an email alert that you replied to me here, but the alert only showed your first paragraph, and my reaction was "McSorley's bathroom? Pf. That was nothing compared to CBGB's..."
ReplyDeleteWide stance redux.
ReplyDeleteAlbum name, actually.
ReplyDeleteWhen I'm on the subway, I always stand and tell the women near me that I can't sit down because my balls are too big. As we know from the better PUA forums, a laughing woman is ready for sex and not to worry if she keeps on laughing as you disrobe (but don't do that last bit while still on the subway). Soon I will make extreme bitcoin from my new book, Bang MTA.
ReplyDeleteOne can make good money manspreading on a slippery slope any Saturday night, by the way. Subscribe to my newsletter today and I shall include a free packet of USGS topographical maps (quarter of an inch equals a mile - you really must see these).
ReplyDeleteA spray product announced suitable for use on public transit:
ReplyDeletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjvKS-ADpc8
Tumblr people? Is this like the Google Streetview car except with no wheels? (I have posed three times for Streetview, but all three times my face came out blurry. WTF?)
ReplyDeleteYeah, I'm not an anti-Semite because I don't hate Bedouins.
ReplyDeleteYes, passive-aggressive men really know how to signal contempt for others in the most economical ways, slouching and spreading them to show off their delightful crotches. Another favorite is the guy who makes eye contact and then hawks a big looger. Charming.
ReplyDeleteMen's rights = Acting like a drunken fratboy in public, and being celebrated and rewarded for it. Anything less is simply feminist oppression.
ReplyDeleteEvery time I'm in Costco.
ReplyDeleteNow you see... THERE'S the difference between you and such wingnut culture warrior tuff guys as, say, Kevin Williamson. Our boy Kev would definitely have kicked that guy in the junk, as long as he first determined that the dude was unlikely to fight back.
ReplyDeleteLate as hell to this party, but a sggestion for those that might be inclined. You know those rubber bands they put around broccoli and asperigus, and others. They are thick and fat and pack a punch. Properly aimed, thell solve the problem in a heart beat. Next time i visit the fair city, im gonna bring a few.
ReplyDeleteNow if one has not mastered the aiming and shooting practice would be indicated. A range of ten feet is easily manageable. One of those taps you in the junk and your legs will snap shut.
/Psa
...
And no weapon to be found on you, neat. A wrist rocket would really"cure the disease of spread", but they're hard to hide in a hurry...
ReplyDeleteKevin probably would have turned to the woman five seats down who had about two aspirins' worth of space between her knees and ask her why she was displaying herself like some whore, then take her seat when she left out of disgust and high-fived the manspreader.
ReplyDeleteI am extremely impressed along with your writing abilities, Thanks for this great share.
ReplyDeleteMcSorley's is awesome. The cheese plate with 2 darks is a well nigh perfect repast.
ReplyDeleteThis. I was on the L last night and the "show" began between 1st and Bedford. I tried in vain to listen to my podcast but couldn't hear it over that noise. To make it worse the lady sitting next to me wearing a fur coat was screeming with glee at it. I tried giving her a disgusted look but to no avail. The show ended with the performers saying it was a good show because nobody got kicked in the face. Ugggh.
ReplyDeleteIt is clearly sexist. I have seen as many women do this as men. As well as having women come on with bags and trollies and take up multiple seats. Its ok to stop everyone doing it, it is not ok to target one gender for something that is done by both.
ReplyDeleteBut hey when the trains and trams where these signs appear get vandalised because it pisses people off taking an entire carriage out of service so they can't be used at all, perhaps they will learn not to target people unfairly....