Among the outtakes: When a Rutgers professor applauded Rice's decision to bail, the Washington Examiner's Charles Hoskinson knocked the prof for appearing on "Russian government-supported propaganda channel Russia Today" and added, "judging from her willingness to appear on RT, Kumar's frequent criticism of U.S. media methods does not extend to those of government-sponsored propaganda outlets." Among the Americans appearing very, very frequently on Russia Today: The libertarian writers of Reason magazine.
UPDATE. I also neglected to include in my roundup Charles C.W. Cooke's "The New Fascism," because life is short and I hadn't seen it yet. It is everything aficionados of his work would expect. Short version: Rich people make market decisions that punish Jesus freaks, so liberals are fascists. He is especially pissed that a couple of guys who are against gay rights were denied a show on, get this, HGTV. (I wonder if anyone will tell him.) Later Cooke tried to explain himself to people who can do basic logic:
“But you like the market,” they have argued. “And this just the market working. HGTV did what it thought best for its bottom line.”
I do like the market, yes. I like HGTV, too. But my criticism isn’t aimed at HGTV or the market, both of which are merely tools. It’s aimed the culture that informs them.And so young Cooke turns Culture Warrior, which has the expected effect on the quality of his work: The rest of his entry is basically variations on "sputter, sputter."
I want television to be run by private companies that are responsive to public opinion. But does this mean I have to like that public opinion? Hardly... if it did, I would be required to be fine with the public’s apparently being so intolerant of the private views of its entertainers that anyone who steps out of line must be quickly removed from their sight.I always assumed Cooke was new to America, but I'm beginning to wonder if he's ever spent a day here, or ever watched TV or talked about it (or anything else) with people who were not graduate students.
UPDATE 2. Also, here's something I left out of the If-I-don't-win-a-Hugo-it's-liberal-fascism section: A rant by John C. Wright at the Intercollegiate Review, full of references to Orwell and sententia like "the lamps of the intellect were put out one by one, first in society at large, then in literature..." as if Obama's America were identical to Nazi Germany.
As funny as Wright's Auschwitz cosplay is, his attempt to explain how people refusing to praise your stupid tits-and-lizards books = tyranny is even better:
Custom is encouraged by countless social cues and expressions of peer pressure. It is subjective, informal, covert, feminine, and indirect.Custom is feminine? Bet he came up with that one when someone called him out for cutting the line to have his picture taken with Power Girl.
No one will arrest you if you don’t tip the waitress, but your friends will look at you askance and recoil as if you exude a mephitic odor.Sounds like he follows Dr. Mrs. Ole Perfesser's method of social criticism. As for the mephitic odor reaction, well, there's more than one possible explanation for that.
I for one will never eat another Rutgers hamburger. How much does Liberty U pay customers to eat their hamburgers?
ReplyDeleteWe don't allow your kind in here!
ReplyDeleteThen why does she have a stool with her name on it?
And...they're really trying to make this about race? Srsly?
Baer's heckler's veto
ReplyDeleteIs this a New Thing? Because I like it...
Doesn't mean he was wrong.
ReplyDelete< a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heckler%27s_veto">Please.
ReplyDeleteThe New Fascism
ReplyDeleteIs this like that New Coke thing? Are they trying to drive up demand for the old version?
Cooke has a policy of not criticizing things that are mere tools, which is why he never speaks up about his fellow NR writers.
ReplyDeleteOK... who is that?
ReplyDeleteHit it! Hit it hard!
ReplyDeletehttp://s30.postimg.org/e0mbglx5d/ramming_speed2.jpg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVPAP62TvRY
ReplyDeleteAn even firmer Firma: "The chair of the board doesn't say a word to stop the wanton escalation either. Maybe she was secretly pleased by the turn of events?" Wanton escalation… secretly pleased… RAMMING SPEED.
ReplyDeleteI didn't know New Hampshire held meetings like that before harvest season.
Wick! The People's Pewet!
ReplyDeletefasc-is-it!
ReplyDeleteRemember the time they spent the summer of 2003 on the fainting couch because someone at a rally held up a sign that bush was like hitler because we invaded a country on a flimsy pretext? Or the time someone on daily kos said Bush was a fascist because he tortured people and his administration behaved like war criminals? That was so cute.
ReplyDeleteDear Movement Conservative Whiners:
ReplyDeleteWhen I was around 15, Ari Fleischer went on record that certain people would have to "watch what they say and watch what they do." He was talking about people like me, people who would be regarded with suspicion and contempt by the general public for years after. This hostility toward anything deemed "unpatriotic" (which is to say "liberal") stung a number of public figures, most famously Bill Maher, Phil Donahue and the Dixie Chicks, but also many other individuals and organizations who were harassed, boycotted, fired, or otherwise punished for voicing controversial views. I might add that this happened with the gleeful, enthusiastic view of many of you now crying about censorship.
Now, I bring this up not as a "gotcha," nor as schadenfreude, or even to point out that we didn't whine as much even when the U.S. Government (up to and including the President) were encouraging this behavior against us. In fact, on some level I sympathize. It is, indeed, a painful thing to learn that your opinions are unpopular enough that they can actually be punitive. I'll even grant you that there are people left-of-center who take a ghoulish delight when people whose opinions they don't like are punished, even when it is unjust.
But here's the rub: This is not an injustice. This is not a conspiracy. This is certainly not fascism. This is not coming from the President, or the homosexual agenda, or "the Left," or the corrupt culture, or any other nebulous force beyond the ken of mortal man. This is a sign that the American people do not like you. It's unpleasant, I know, and maybe you don't think it's fair. No one expects you to like it. What we would like is for you to stop complaining about it. Yes, I know that kvetching about something you can't actually change can be very cathartic. However, when that's all you do, it becomes self-indulgent.
You - all of you - have become like I was: Petulant, self-pitying pricks bitching about the injustice of a world that doesn't understand us, seeing tyranny in every inconvenience and spite in every failure. Of course, I was 15 and expected to act like that. What's your excuse?
Poor Cooke, he "likes the market", but he works for a magazine that would fail if it were subject to the forces of "the market". He's a naif, a hothouse flower that would wither and die if it weren't for the fact that he's merely a courtier.
ReplyDeletePeople Who Don't Pay Their TV Licence Fee Against The Nazis!
ReplyDeleteAt least he wasn't exercising his Heckler & Koch veto. That seems to be getting more popular.
ReplyDeleteModern conservatism is the sound of a door slamming shut in a fit of pique forever.
ReplyDeleteSure it's his real name. Just ask his co-workers Carrie Eleison and Hal Eluyah.
ReplyDelete"Shut up! You're not my real country!"
ReplyDeleteRob Schneider sticks the landing: "Democracies don't end well."
ReplyDeleteWhat could better sum up the thinking of a movement that runs on vote suppression, billionaire boosting, and reflexive authoritarianism?
Deuce Bigalow is doing political criticism now?
ReplyDeleterob...the robster! makin' political prognosticashuuuns!
ReplyDeleteSo, where were you in the '80s while MTV cycled though the entire The Young Ones catalog about fifty times? Huh?
ReplyDelete+1 I LEARNED IT WATCHING YOU DAD
ReplyDeleteDouble standards are twice as good, obviously.
ReplyDeleteI wish I'd never been founded!
ReplyDeleteHe continues his quest to be the worst anything at anything. "You can get murdered", he says. I think I must have missed the rush of brutal execution-style killings of people who just want their country back. Or who don't want to pay tax at all. Or who want to openly discriminate against everyone who isn't entirely like them. Or who actually want to merge state and government power into proper fascism. Or... Come to think of it, didn't Fred Phelps die of old age recently? Man, that's a subtle murder right there. That's the kind of murder you want on your record. No one's going to catch you for that murder.
ReplyDeleteO.K., this is making me nervous:"I visit about a dozen campuses a year, and at nearly every one, it's common to hear tales about how the social or administrative policing of thought crimes is all the rage," said National Review's Jonah Goldberg ...What the hell is he doing "visiting a dozen campuses a yr.?" And has anyone notified campus security?
ReplyDeleteHe makes it a point never to use the same public restroom twice.
ReplyDeleteHe's well aware of the "freshman fifteen" and he's on the prowl for starchy treats.
ReplyDeleteI was going to linkify it, but I thought it would be cloying. Anyway Baer's is more of a filibusterer's veto.
ReplyDeleteThe people have elected not to watch his movies anymore, so democracies haven't ended well for him.
ReplyDeleteMax Baer?
ReplyDeleteIndeed. Sounds as if someone's overdue for some Revolutionary Cultural Self-Criticism sessions.
ReplyDeleteI love you people. Upvotes are on me!
ReplyDeleteThat's an easy one! Listening to Ledernacken on the legendary WLIR.
ReplyDeleteWhy would they be upset at the ejection of a disruptive asshole?
ReplyDeleteDepends on what the disruptive asshole ejects.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to run away to Sealand, you just watch!
ReplyDeleteI would like to pack up my teddy bear, a pack of Oreos and two pairs of socks, and run away with this comment.
ReplyDeleteCampus Reform had the smoking gun
ReplyDeleteI see what you did there.
Remember how eeeeeeeevil Move On was for making this video...I mean, rejecting this video submitted for a contest...whatever... Anyway, it was really outrageous and needed to be censored, trust me.
ReplyDeleteOr, to be more specific, that he embraced the same type of "interrogation" techniques as the gestapo
ReplyDeleteTo us, Deuce Bigalow stings the most.
ReplyDeleteI am totally ignorant of this Rob Schneider person, never having seen any of his movies or TV shows, but I gotta say, his IMDB entry sure doesn't read like a wingnut. While he certainly sounds like one now, he must have the ability to turn his ideology off when it comes to earning a living, so I'll give him props for that at least.
The most amazing thing to me is that none of the sheeple in the audience visibly or audibly react
ReplyDeleteIf I know my sheeple, they were probably sleeping.
No need, his ability to earn a living seems to have stalled, so he's probably angling for a wingnut welfare sinecure.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, his movies are Geneva Convention violations.
What is it with ex-Saturday Night Live cast members? Dennis Miller, Victoria Jackson, now this dork...well, we'll always have Al Franken.
ReplyDeleteA lot of right-wingers like to use a strawman version of "liberal tolerance" to attempt to shame the opposition, but Louie Gohmert actually comes out and says how monstrous liberals are because they "can't tolerate their intolerance." So intolerance is a bad thing when you refuse to tolerate someone else's intolerance, which is a good thing. It's the semantic equivalent of stale asparagus pee, and I can't help but cast aspersions on it.
ReplyDelete... tales about how the social or administrative policing of thought crimes is all the rage," ...
ReplyDeleteI picture Pantload saying this while wearing a raccoon coat and spectator shoes.
That's strictly because of those orders of protection.
ReplyDeleteAnybody here besides me* ever been to Gilford, NH? It's not exactly a bustling metropolis. Their average graduating class runs around 120-130 kids. Which tells me their elected school board is unpaid, small towns not having the budget to waste on such frivolities. And it's likely that Mr. Baer is something of a fixture at public meetings--the town I grew up in had a couple of reliable cranks who loved to have an audience when they climbed up their hobby-horses.
ReplyDeleteWhy didn't anyone do anything? Baer's probably the reason they have the damn two-minute rule in the first place, and nobody wants to waste another damn second of their lives listening to his drivel.
*BAck in the mid-80's I saw Lords of the New Church play at a roller rink for about twenty-five of New Hampshire's finest wastrel youth. The night before they'd had an audience of 1200 in New York, and they weren't terribly impressed with us. Their opening act, Cactus World News, played their hearts out.
That was exactly my thought when I watched the video. Baer's probably THAT GUY.
ReplyDeleteIn the comments, SIECUS came up as yet another conservative bête noire.
Blush.
ReplyDeleteOnly the private lives of gay people should be judged by the public. Provided the public disapproves of gay people because anything else would be fascism.
ReplyDeleteALSO! Only duly appointed judges should decide whether a law is constitutional unless the judge makes a decision I don't like in which case only duly elected legislators may pass a law unless I don't like the law in which case only The People should be allowed to decide by casting a ballot unless they vote the wrong way in which case I will shout Hitler! a few hundred times and sulk.
You'll be sorry when I'm dead because I've been murdered by islamohomomarxists!
ReplyDeleteHenninger:
ReplyDeletethe left has hit ramming speed across a broad swath of American life
Across a broad swath[e]? Evidently the Left is driving a ride-on-lawnmower. I didn't realise they could reach Ram Speed but that's America.
I'm gonna fake my death at the hands of islamohomomarxists just so I can watch you cry at my funeral, and them I'm going to move to the Bundy ranch!
ReplyDeleteSheeple at RAMMING SPEED? It must be tupping season.
ReplyDeleteI had a great comment to post; vulgar, yet erudite. Then I got off the boat, and found this molten hunk 'o beefcake. Texas Rep Blake Farenthold. Wants to arrrest AG Holder ( Fast & Furious? Really? Antiquarian, or just too lazy to check his inbox? ) It's shabby of me to rag on someone over looks but, in my defense, his personality is worse. Who votes for these people? Look at that smile, those eyes! This headshot alone should have the authorities going over his property with a methane sniffer...
ReplyDelete...shit, now I forgot what I was gonna say.
Forget it, Smut, he's on a roll.
ReplyDeleteBitchin'!
ReplyDeleteI would happily contribute to buy a Ride-on Lawnmower for Norbizness just so he could make this scenario happen.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how many space princesses he has chained to his dais.
ReplyDeleteThere is a man whose bookshelf includes every single volume of Gor, if nothing else.
ReplyDeleteThe anti-vaccine loon? Crank magnetism, how does it work?
ReplyDeleteEvery single book is dogeared and cheeto-stained.
ReplyDeleteCheeto-stained? His Gor books pray for Cheeto stains.
ReplyDelete'All Your Children Are Belong To Us' - Dad Arrested For Questioning New Hampshire School Board About Sexually Explicit Book," cried The Conservative Tree House.
ReplyDeleteI was about to say "Someone's still doing Zero Wing jokes?" but it sounds like intentional humor would go against their life choices.
Not to mention an extremely smug look on his face.
ReplyDeleteAlfred E. Neuman's younger, slower brother, jealous of his brother's quick wit and free spirit, not to mention the fact that he was the target of all Alfred's pranks growing up, entered public life with a bitter hatred of the world and a chip on his shoulder the size of an oak tree. No wonder he got into Republican politics.
ReplyDeleteI didn't know Rutger Hauer owned a chain of burger joints.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure a liberal fascist like yourself could get a Dept. of Ag subsidy for one of these:
ReplyDeleteWe can send his drunken secretary out on a mission of gruesome riding lawnmower vengeance.
ReplyDeleteYeah, funny how it's all about the color of her skin, not the content of her character....
ReplyDeleteWe can send his drunken secretary out on a mission of gruesome riding lawnmower revenge.
ReplyDeleteArtist's impression of The Left at ramming speed, during the Battle of Lissa (1866), about 10 seconds before impact.
ReplyDeletehttp://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/68/Anton_Romako_001.jpg/375px-Anton_Romako_001.jpg
Well, that and the fact that he's a trust-fund baby.
ReplyDeleteWhat, me... BENGHAZI!!!
ReplyDeleteHe's on a quest to find a professor willing to make Liberal Fascism required reading.
ReplyDeleteI went to the link about Alfred E Newman's tubby cousin the Texas legislator threatening to arrest Eric Holder.
ReplyDelete"If an American citizen had not complied with one of the Justice Department’s subpoenas, they would be in jail and not sitting here in front of me, testifying."
So, um, I guess birtherism has set its sights beyond the Fraud in Chief himself.
I'll have you know I was just making a joke upthread, thinking it was
ReplyDeletejust someone with the same name. I don't know if the fact that's it's
actually him makes it funnier or sadder, and if it reflects worse on
him, the people who hired him, or just America's cultural twilight years
in general.
Liberal fascists are why Deuce Bigalow: Space Gigolo isn't this summer's comedy blockbuster.
ReplyDeleteLet's just say you have to wear sunglasses if they're exposed to UV radiation.
ReplyDeleteWhat was it Mel Brooks' 200 Year Old Man said? "Fascism is I cut my finger. Freedom is you fall into an open sewer and die."
ReplyDeleteHonestly, it's the eyes. He spent hours in front of a mirror, practicing that smile. I could see him as the Funniest Guy on the bowling team, or a pretty good Crazy Uncle, except for those eyes. The smile doesn't touch them. There's some bad shit going on behind them, mark my words.
ReplyDeleteI hope I'd never judge someone based on looks alone. Look at BBBB; his pic looks like it was taken in prison, and he seems pretty cool.
But seriously, this dude has a dungeon in his basement...
23 skiderp!
ReplyDeleteIslamohomomarxists shot an elephant in fabulous red fezzes. . .
ReplyDeleteI've... seen things you people wouldn't believe... [contemptuous laugh] Snack chips on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched onion rings glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those... moments... will be lost in time, like [small cough] steers... in... rain. Time... to fry...
ReplyDeleteApropos of nothing...h/t www.achewood.com
ReplyDeleteEvidently the Left is driving a ride-on-lawnmower.
ReplyDeleteForget it, Smut; it's Chiatown.
Secret treaties, man.
ReplyDelete~
In your rush to mock poor Blake, you've all overlooked one thing: the original Gor novels aren't picturebooks.
ReplyDeleteSwissCoke™
ReplyDeleteAtheist could have used a show made strictly for *young adults*.
ReplyDeleteIn Schneider's case I'd guess he needs a scapegoat for what seemed like a promising career in his youth imploding by the time he was 35.
ReplyDeleteI quit following it for a while, but I must say I does love me some Achewood.
ReplyDeleteHe wants to arrest him so that he can eat him.
ReplyDeleteAh, but Baldwin got canned for using anti-gay slurs, which I assume is Cooke's point. Those damned censorious gays, have so much power even a liberal like Baldwin can't get away with a few slurs now and then.
ReplyDeleteAre we sure it wasn't taken in prison?
ReplyDeleteshe's on-record saying that she didn't personally benefit from the civil rights movement. the imagery is so wrongheaded it should be wearing an alt-universe goatee.
ReplyDeleteNow I must find the finger-inna-bun scene from HItcher.
ReplyDeleteHe made them into picturebooks. With clippings from magazines and a Sharpie.
ReplyDeleteThe Gazoogle informs me that the attempted graphic-novel adaptations of Gor fell through. To the dismay of many on the Left.
ReplyDeleteYeah. Most probable sentiment in the audience, even the parts that kinda-sorta agreed with his opinions? "Please, please, please shut up. Every second this soul-killing meeting goes on is a second of my life I will never get back."
ReplyDeleteI swear I have no idea what it is about Republicans (men), but they always look like pedophiles. What is up with that? The women look like really bad 1980 beauty pageant contestants. Their voices...awful. Eric Cantors voice...OMG. Michelle Bachman's voice....OMG. The whole lot of them are like circus freaks. Who votes for these people?
ReplyDeleteNon-shallow people? ;)
ReplyDeleteWell, non-shallow people with a very, very odd idea about what counts as "inner beauty," I suppose...
My personal line is that making fun of people's looks if they've already
ReplyDeletegot awful personalities is usually defensible, and making fun of things
anyone with money can fix like clothing and haircuts even more so.
I can live with that line... as long as you're aware that on the Internet, you always run the risk that one of the people you're talking with looks exactly like the guy you're making fun of, which might lead to embarrassment. ;)
Well, my other working assumption is that they've got as much sublimated self-loathing as I do on the topic.
ReplyDeleteTangent: I've heard a theory that a lot of the virulent sexism associated with lots of fantasy, sci-fi, or comic fans is not sexism in the "women are inferior" sense, but because a lot of them just have a terribly bleak history with relationships and intimacy, not because they're all bad people (though some are regardless) but because of things like being fat, or unattractive, or just awkward and shy. If they're old enough, they're used to being able to retreat into their fandoms without constantly being reminded of it, because a lot of their compatriots were men who looked like them and had the same problems. But now with nerd fandoms going mainstream and more attractive or well-adjusted people hanging around, they start feeling like it's high school all over again, and get pissed. Similar with Reddit, which is of course infamous for sexism but the flipside of that in my experience is that a lot of people there see themselves as a brotherhood (emphasis on brother) and making fun of each other for such personal failings is considered bad form. Splinter in your brother's eye, etc.
Not that it excuses lashing out at people who haven't done anything, but I think if that theory's accurate, it's important to understand when talking about those issues.
But my criticism isn’t aimed at HGTV or the market, both of which are merely tools. It’s aimed the culture that informs them.
ReplyDeleteI'm confused. Is capitalism great because it means capitalists all have agency, or is great because it means they're all blameless no matter what they decide to do?
I dunno, maybe CW Cooke is slyly undermining capitalism here. All his "the worker is merely a tool" talk sounds an awwwwwful lot like Marxism, if yiz ask me.
There was a TV show
ReplyDeleteWhich gathered all its dough
Catering to the opinions of the masses;
When opinions were good
The show was very, very good;
But when they were bad, it was fascist.
What worries me more is that some day one of these people might fake their conversion to islamohomomarxism, blow up a building, then tell the world "YOU SEE? WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT THOSE PEOPLE!"
ReplyDelete. . . in Alabama, because the Tuscaloosa.
ReplyDeleteHe's a legacy. His grandma was a big deal in Texas politics - she was a solid FDR liberal. I figure in the coming cycle the Koch brothers will be spending a lot of money in this guy's district to make it illegal to use any of the electricity generated from her spinning in her grave.
ReplyDeleteDunno, was that too far to go for the joke?
Kudos to someone, most probably in a thread here (maybe even you!), who described him awhile back as "Alfred E. Neuman on a 5,000-calorie-a-day diet." That description leaps to mind every time I see him.
ReplyDeleteNah, he's trying to say if the culture weren't "informed" by a buncha Hollyweird panty-waists turning us all into warriors for the homosexual agenda then the free market would function as Jesus, Ayn Rand & The Holy GhostInvisible Hand decreed. You know, in favor of reaction.
ReplyDeleteAlthough "HGTV or the market, both of which are merely tools" is an interesting bit of heresy. Isn't the market by itself the alpha & omega of all human existence? I suppose what really counts is who really controls the "tools." Somehow I doubt ol' Cee Dub wants much worker control.
Rob Schneider IS...The Pundit!
ReplyDelete[cue footage]
SCHNEIDER: Derpty derp de derp-derp derpity derp derp!
There was a time when liberals in this country believed in debate. But
ReplyDeletethat is increasingly not the case for the modern Left in America. No,
the modern Left in America has grown tired of debate. Their new strategy
is simply to try to silence their critics.
Yes, you idiots, there was a time like that! You know why it ended? Because those liberals in your country who believed in debate caught on to the fact that you didn't believe in debate worth a damn, you believed in letting them talk at you for a while and then ignoring them and doing whatever you wanted anyway! And now you have the gall to complain that they no longer want to play that game? You... you... I have no words.
I think there is some truth in the frequent gripe that America has become polarised and that there is no middle ground anymore. (even Obama seem to have given up on being bipartisan. And who can blame him, really? No matter what he gives the Republicans, they just feel that that's the least he can do to make up for having the nerve to exist in the first place) But how else can it possibly be? Republicans have had it all their own way for so long that the very idea of compromising feels unnatural and unthinkable to them, and Democrats have had nothing at all their way for so long that when they hear the word "compromise" they mentally translate it as "you give me half of what I want, and I give you none of what you want." One party has been methodically trained to associate diplomacy with pain, and the other party has forgotten that it even exists.
It's always projection.
ReplyDeleteEven now, a usurping black ram is tupping our white ewes! I want my city-state back!
ReplyDeleteI was only in prison once, for work, so I was in business casual. This picture was taken in a dojo, hence the outfit. The "glare" is due to me not wearing corrective lenses when my friend took it.
ReplyDeleteUh , thanks?
ReplyDeleteDid you know they kept those uniforms, and those beards, when they went on to form the band "Need Tegethoff"?
ReplyDeleteAn excellent point, and thank you for making it. It does put a number of things in perspective.
ReplyDeleteI do wonder about Cooke's understanding of economics. I think I've got it: The market is supreme, making mere tools of both its job creators and consumers, such that all they can do is "go with the flow." But at the same time, a handful of individuals escape this dehumanizing flow by being mind-bendingly successful at making popular consumables (e.g., movies, but not oil)... and once these individuals are free of the flow, they then demand everyone still in the flow make a stark choice: either obey vastly unpopular ideas (e.g., treat gays like humans) or else become unpopular. And doing so doesn't affect the popularity of the uber-individuals' consumables (e.g., the movies they make) because going to see these movies is... is... part of the flow, I guess, in which the rest of us have no agency? We just have to go? Preferably opening weekend? Oof. I feel like I almost had it, and then it fell apart. Truly, this Cooke is not a simple man.
ReplyDelete2009 was really a crushing year -- to have worked so hard for Obama in 2008 because he seemed to be the polar opposite of Bush not politically but temperamentally -- a guy who was going to say let's discuss our ideas and move the country forward on consensus. Man, that whole dream just got ground to pieces by the GOP. No interest in listening. I think I heard the first calls for impeachment before September. It was shocking -- but I suppose these idiots think it's their job to insist there's no consensus even when plainly there is, because they represent a segment of the population that insists on denying there's consensus. But c'mon, you douchebags, global warming? You don't get to decide based on nothing that you disagree with the "notion."
ReplyDeleteThe only consolation is that Florida sinks first.
Why the elephant was wearing fabulous red fezzes I'll never know.,,
ReplyDeleteRob Schneider sticks the landing: "Democracies don't end well."
ReplyDeleteCompared to what? Monarchies? Dictatorships?
23 skidmark!
ReplyDeleteHey, don't knock it. Unlike some people who try to make this sort of career shift, Schneider is every bit as good a political commentator as he is a comedian.
ReplyDeleteThis guy wants to have AG Holder arrested? Pretty sure where his hand is is illegal in fifteen states.
ReplyDeleteI would wait on the platform for hours for this train, gently holding my bouquet of flowers and dabbing grateful tears from my eyes.
ReplyDeleteInteresting how Cooke sneaks "Phil Robertson" into Cooke's Book Of Martyrs without mentioning what conservatives did to get Duck Dynasty back on the air.
ReplyDelete"Jonah Goldberg, who did not explain why his rightwing ass was even allowed on these campuses if the thought-policing's so intense there."
ReplyDeleteHe and Jame O'Keefe go undercover(s), of course. Pimps and they Hos are ALWAYS allowed on liberal fascist campuses.
What possible set of circumstances could have lead to Flounder here standing in close proximity to a woman in lingerie while he's wearing rubber-duckie pajamas?
ReplyDeleteAnd as for where his right hand might be, the woman is still smiling, so I'll guess that hand is NOT touching her.
OK... the first Deuce Bigalow movie was funny.
ReplyDeleteInteresting that Flounder would want to right that horse. He should immediately sit down with Alberto Gonzales, Dick Cheney, and George Bush, all three of whom blew off Congressional subpoenas by claiming separation of powers.
ReplyDeleteAnd how did they get those little fezzes to stay on their huge heads?
ReplyDeleteFrom John C. Wright to this Cooke guy they are wigging out over the change in the cultural climate. Now somewhat forgotten is Wright's attempt to demonstrate that Law is Masculine and firm while Culture is coy, negotiated, bitchy, and feminine. He objected to what he saw as the rise of gossipy, punitive, culture--the kind of backstabbing bitchery that leads manly, law abiding, powerful men to be brought down by thought crimes and left deviationism through cocktail circuit and small town mumering. Show us on the legal code where Eich touched you or geddout.
ReplyDeleteThese are people who would happilly argue Natural Law all day long, and insist that what is generic is also most principled and most sacred--until it turned out that nobody gived a fuck about gay sex or even letting women into the sci fi club. Then all of a sudden "its natural" and " majority rule" and "everybody knows that" turn into a frightening monster. Community Standards? What's that? Never heard of 'em.
With all this endless screaming about liberal fascism, I expect boy historian Jonah Goldberg will soon be celebrated as the Wise Old Man of Wingerland, and his boarding of an NRO cruise ship or his entrance into conservative cocktail parlors will part the brethren like Atticus Finch's arrival at the courthouse.
ReplyDeleteLet's murder irony all over again:
There is no word in the English language that gets thrown around more freely by people who don’t know what it means than “fascism.” Indeed, the more someone uses the word “fascist” in everyday conversation, the less likely it is that he knows what he’s talking about. - Jonah Goldberg, Liberal Fascism
Rob Schneider and Victoria Jackson running mates in 2016?
ReplyDeletea handful of individuals escape this dehumanizing flow by being mind-bendingly successful....they then demand everyone still in the flow make a stark choice...Oof. I feel like I almost had it, and then it fell apart
ReplyDeleteSo - astute analysis of some conserva-goober's fumbling understanding of the free market or equally astute summary of the Matrix trilogy?
Like the Music Man, he rolls into town with a battered suitcase of unsold volumes.
ReplyDelete"You got Trouble;
right here in River City!"
Yeah, Franken must have LOVED working with those talent-hack assholes.
ReplyDeleteSomewhere in here there's gotta be a joke about an intern doing the NRO equivalent of sweeping up after the elephants and thinking "What - and leave Conservatism!?"
ReplyDeleteDon't worry, I think u look bad-ass.
ReplyDeleteFascism is when people like you tell people like me that you don't like us.
ReplyDeleteWho votes for these people?
ReplyDeleteLess talented circus freaks.
Just like the Devil can cite the Bible for his own purposes, so, too, He can misuse Capitalism for Leftist Fascism.
ReplyDelete(I forget, do we capitalize He for the Devil?)
Compared to libertarian utopias, which, unlike all those messy, real world examples of government you mentioned, shimmer in beautiful golden light just over the horizon and taunt conservatives to madness by being always just beyond their reach regardless of how much they stamp their little feet and demand them NOW!
ReplyDelete*sniff* *sniff* I'm cloying? (lip trembling...)
ReplyDeleteThank god for "Natural Law", which, in the conservative lexicon, has come to mean: "Whatever I think is right."
ReplyDeleteThere is a Republican out there with "inner beauty"? Where? Please point them out--because this I gotta see. What do you think makes them look the way they normally do??? Lack of your so called "inner beauty". When you are spewing forth hate every single day of your life there is not one chance in hell you will have "inner beauty". I believe the hate that oozes out of their every pore is what makes them look the way they do....ugly.
ReplyDeleteMust be Edros O, saying stuff like that. Him and his white cat. *sniff*
ReplyDeleteOn a serious note, I've been a little disappointed with Franken. I was hoping he'd be more of a... if not a liberal firebrand... shall we say, a deflater of wingnut gasbags than he turned out to be.
ReplyDeleteI tend to look a bit serial killer-ish in photographs
ReplyDeleteAs opposed to Representative Farenthold (R-Giedi Prime), who looks completely killer-ish in photographs.
Sissy Farenthold was his step-grandmother; less genetic transference of ideology? Wikipedia says his father was murdered by gangsters when Blake was 10, so maybe his kinks aren't all generated by the wingnut gravy train.
ReplyDeleteHey, that's still a zinger in his tree house!
ReplyDelete(One can, depending on one's relationship with Him.)
ReplyDeleteThe show's tanking this season, which just demonstrates the unholy power of liberal fascism -- the libtards refuse to watch it, and of course they are 99% of the nation's cable audience.
ReplyDeleteI hate natural law so much. It is absolutely devoid of moral or intellectual standing.
ReplyDeleteJonah in fishnets and a micro-mini... Do not want!!!
ReplyDeleteThat's the point! Plus, I'm not as wimpy as I look.
ReplyDeleteOuch my eyes......
ReplyDelete8(
The fickleness and short attention span of the American TV audience is one of the most pernicious effects of Liberal Fascism.
ReplyDeleteWhatever happened to the Natural Law Party? Was that just a Libertarian splinter group?
ReplyDeleteBy smile, you mean painful grimace, right?
ReplyDeleteSo not only was I going to far, but on the wrong damn highway in any case. Oh well.
ReplyDeleteBig Bad Bald Bastahrd,
ReplyDeleteBaddest man in the whole damn' yard;
Badder than King Kong old,
And leaner than Blake Farenthold.
Giedi Prime
ReplyDeleteMore Rabban than Harkonnen, of course.
Sadly, it's much more likely they'll just blow up a government building while screaming "Rally to me, patriots!" and standing on the corpse of a child.
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking we don't have too long a wait before the next Timothy McVeigh decides to water the tree of liberty with the blood of innocents.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and like I said, conservative voters must have a very strange idea of what is beautiful. :P
ReplyDeleteOther than that, er... how very Oscar Wilde of you?
Why they don't all just up stakes and move to Somalia is beyond me. No laws or regulations or even a government to get in the way. Strong religious influence and very family-centered way of life. And a culture (particularly along the coast) that rewards enterprising capitalists who muster the resources to collect the treasure that passes by every day.
ReplyDeleteWhat it ejects is itself. He might not be a pro at anything else, but he's certainly in the top-tier when it comes to being prolapsed.
ReplyDeleteThey've already made it a career of evil.
ReplyDeleteYou... you... I have no words.
ReplyDeleteI've stopped trying to find words when I read crap like that. I just go watch this clip about eight times or until I feel better: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nH_v0WpTdLk
I think Victoria is running for County Commissioner or somesuch in the most white-flight, wingnutty county in central Tennessee. So if she wins that's plenty of experience to get on the Presidential ticket the next cycle.
ReplyDeleteAnd why did he think that immortalizing the event in a photograph was a good idea? Family really does count -- an no-name schlub with this portrait rolling around the interwebs wouldn't get hired at McDonald's.
ReplyDeleteOh, I don't think it's ever too far to go for a good "rolling over in the grave" joke.
ReplyDeleteI've got a Rose Kennedy story that requires a captive audience, if I'm going to tell it right...
Maybe that's just me.
I will never un-see this. Damn you.
ReplyDeleteIndeed. These days, I consider "inability to be satisfied" to be a mandatory wingnut qualification.
ReplyDeleteGolf clap for the both of yez.
ReplyDelete...at least the Matrix trilogy gave us "bullet time."
That said, McCarthy = misunderstood humanitarian.
ReplyDeleteIt's the lack of legal standing for natural law which bothers me!
ReplyDeleteDamn it, when I say "He did it!" and you say, "No, you did it!" you're breaking natural law, a crime against God!
And there once was, or so the decoder-telex tells us, "a man from Nantucket"
ReplyDeleteI'll get the second round!
ReplyDeleteTalking like a demented white Southern preacher became de rigger for GOP politicians during the 80's as a nod to the rising tide of televangelists.
ReplyDeleteIt's full of Somalis, every last one of which has considerable experience living in a libertarian utopia* than your average well-fed and indifferently-skilled lower-middle-class patriot**, particularly in the field of applied violence. Despite the active fantasy-league scenarios of insurrection and revolution, you may have noticed that people with actual experience in such countries (veterans, Peace Corp volunteers, members of NGOs) tend to be pretty keen on peaceful transitions of power and the governmental structures that enable it. Libertarians who snivel about abstract 'freedoms' without having to make a single sacrifice*** are just toddlers with beards.
ReplyDeleteAlso, your average libertarian is really going to stand out in a crowd of Somalis, if you know what I mean.
*Hellhole.
**A sulky white man with an assault rifle.
***It's okay with them if you have to sacrifice.
The reason glibterarians so love their freedom fantasies is that they always picture themselves as starting on top, and they always expect that whatever vestige of the state they refuse to support will still be there to protect them from their fellow glibertarians.
ReplyDeleteIt's a great political philosophy that can't even survive under laboratory conditions.
the woman is still smiling
ReplyDeleteThe phrase "paid professional" comes to mind. Never having been a stripper*, I don't know what it takes to keep a smile plastered on one's face while interacting with skeevy, leering men. In this case, I'll go out on a limb and guess that she's smiling because those jammies are still buttoned up.
*An entirely unfounded assumption based upon context; no offense is intended to the young lady in the photo.
Do you owe Him money? Caps.
ReplyDeleteOW OW OW OW OW OW OW
ReplyDeleteThe other thing about Natural Law is that it is "proven" by being "true" about some number of people or situations. But when it turns out that one man's law is another man's exception suddenly its the majority of people or animals or situations who are getting it wrong and "violating" god's will.
ReplyDeleteInteresting that Flounder would want to ride that horse.
ReplyDeleteUnless "interesting" is somehow now an internet synonym for "par for the course," this might be time to introduce a new acronym I've invented.
IAAOAWDBR: It's Always And Only Appropriate When Done By Republicans.
Have we all so quickly forgotten the price that Cliven Bundy and his family paid for exercising their God-given patriotic right to stand up to the federal government... dying in a hail of withering gunfire from jackbooted BLM assault teams, their bodies torn and bloody on the ground... What? Never happened, you say? Their cattle CONTINUE to graze illegally on federal grassland, you say? Jeez, I'm sorry... I must have confused Sean Hannity's wet dream with actual events. Never mind...
ReplyDeleteNo joke--I'm sure there's a long line of grifters looking at people like Jonah and Rich Lowary and K-Lo, and thinking, "Wow! You can make a good living, meet important people, and maybe even become rich if Regnery picks up your manuscript. And all you have to do is figure out a way to get 'in' with these folks."
ReplyDeleteWingnut welfare has a very strong allure.
Keep in mind also that what we wanted in 2003 was for the United States to not invade a country unprovoked.
ReplyDeleteWhat they want now is to shout bigotry without being called out about it.
Well, shit, for that matter, life doesn't end well. Because, you know.
ReplyDeleteWhy they don't all just up stakes and move to Somalia is beyond me.
ReplyDeleteYears ago I had a libertarian roommate, and I asked him this. He explained that going to Somalia "wouldn't count," because it would be a choice to go, and he'd be able to leave by choice at any moment as well. He said that for libertarianism to work, there would have to be no alternative, no possibility of escape from it.
I think he said this well after I'd learned to prepare a grain of salt for our every conversation.