I don't know whether AEI's in on the joke or not, but if he's actually getting paid for this, that's so banksta.
UPDATE. Commenter mortimer informs me that the guy has done a new one. I agree with mortimer that the passage he quotes can't be improved upon:
Near the end of the song, all this culminates in a warning to wannabe revolutionaries everywhere: “Dr. Dre be the name / Still running the game.” And this extends, of course, to those who believe that a Marxist utopia can be established through democratically endorsed redistribution of wealth. As Dr. Young explains in “Forgot About Dre,” a song from his next album: “If it was up to me / You motherf****** would stop coming up to me / With your hands out lookin’ up to me / Like you want something free.”But the best is the guy's exegesis on the Brazilian "Rap das Armas." Looking for joints repping "principled defense of Second Amendment rights," he can't get with popular American numbers like "Cop Killer," as they show a "thirst for wanton machismo," so he picks up this foreign one, which he says "finds its ultimate justification in self-defense against totalitarian government" as it "describes a neighborhood ready to resist." As always, gun nuts find the prospect of fighting the totalitarian police appealing unless black Americans are doing it, in which case it's just pathology.
I feel a Poe's Law warrant coming on.
UPDATE 2. The rightwing rap craze continues! Meet Florida GOP Rep. Trey Radel:
The first [song that represents my views on Washington] that I would have to refer to would be 'Fight the Power,' by Public Enemy. This is a song that... if you really get down to it, reflects the conservative message of having a heavy handed federal government... Chuck D of Public Enemy and I may disagree on certain philosophies of government, but I think at the end of the day— and this is where I take my love of hip hop music— where there have been issues and problems with either heavy handed law enforcement... or heavy handed government itself.Amanda teases him mercilessly. At least Radel's bullshit makes some kind of real-world sense, though: He's a politician trying to put himself over as a Regular Bro, and acquaintance with one of the 10 or 12 hiphop records all white people know is a definite bro signifier. And his bro-babble shows in its most common and primitive state the childish impulse to claim all the things you like in life -- cool tunes, great movies, choc-a-mut ice creams -- for some stupid ideology.
The Zhdanovism is depressing, though at present I think these guys have as much hope of colonizing rap as Jonah Goldberg has of winning a decathlon.
Top Five Conservative Emotions:
ReplyDelete5. Is "stupid" an emotion?
4. Anger
3. Fear
2. Anger again
1. Rage
"I shot the sheriff" is a stirring paean to the conservative virtue of resistance to government tyranny through the application of our sacred second-amendment rights. "But I didn't shoot no deputy," moreover, illustrates the conservative virtue of self-restraint and obedience to the rule of law.
ReplyDeleteI suppose Tupac is OK if you're looking for a conservative attack on contemporary feminist beliefs, but I'm still holding the #1 spot for the upcoming "Ballad of Ariel Castro."
ReplyDeleteRoy says joke, but I think it's safe to say that these people are so lacking in self-awareness (and so negligent and ignorant about their topics) that, to them, this deadly serious kulture-kampf krap.
ReplyDeleteNWA's "Fuck Da Police": salute to Red Dawn and the Wolverines?
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiX7GTelTPM
~
“And since a man can’t make one / He has no right to tell a woman when and where to create one / So will the real men get up?”
ReplyDeleteHe actually interprets this as anti-abortion. Amazing.
Rap, like most forms of popular music, is full of misogyny. This month in the Journal of Basic Shit That Even the Most Cretinous Dipshits Already
ReplyDeleteHad a Sense Of.
After listening to Angela Davis speak for two hours on slavery and the prison industrial complex; these nitwits don't even sound smart enough to be stupid.
ReplyDeleteIt's an evil force that pays people do be so mindless, to put that thoughtlessness into text, and then to leave it where people can see it.
These top 21 rap songs are apparently being listed in a 21-part series! Ten bucks says the writer goes on to better things (The Daily Caller or World Net Daily) before the series is completed. Which is too bad, because I've got another ten bucks that says the Number One song is Lee Atwater's "Nigga Nigga Nigga."
ReplyDeleteI don't know whether AEI's in on the joke...
ReplyDeleteLet's ask Jason Richwine. He seems to be up to date on what the conservative think tanks are looking for.
Top 5 conservative shits:
ReplyDelete5: A shit taken by a Mr. Robert J. Schultz of Fairfield, Ohio on July 29, 2008 at a neighborhood Chilis. What makes this shit so conservative is that Mr. Schultz had just finished gorging himself on a plate of deep-fried potato skins, as is his right as a free American, and just got finished telling his nagging bitch of a wife that she shouldn't tell him what he can and can't eat. That Mr. Schultz suffered a heart attack while trying to squeeze it out only strengthens his commitment to liberty, etc. etc.
First in a series?
ReplyDeleteAsking for JG, who's busy walking the dog right now: Are sharts eligible?
ReplyDeleteAs long as the rest of you can handle it. I'm also accepting submissions.
ReplyDelete4: On April 17, 2002, fraternity brother Kevin Lewis of Athens, Georgia attempted to shit on his friend's car from the balcony of his third story apartment. That he fell off and landed on the car only shows the conservative spirit of always seeing things through when you start them. The car was a Honda, which also shows a strongly conservative attitude towards foreigners.
Classic Kappa Alpha move.
ReplyDeleteWhat can I say? Stan needs to remove the stick from his ass, fire up a doobie and at least loosen the shoelaces on his brogues before he embarks on this subject again.
ReplyDeleteBecause he's not hip. Or hip-hop. Period.
Motherfucker didn't even bother to listen to the songs all the way through. After its self-reliance message, Nas's "I Can" (#16) veers off into a muddled stew of Afro-centric histopracty, arguing that Timbuktu's scholars taught Greeks and Romans, that Europeans "robbed [Africa] naked" (and still do today), and that Alexander the Great tried to cover up Africa's distinguished past by shooting (I did say muddled) the noses off of "mountains." I'm sure all of those would go over real well on the conservative plantation.
ReplyDeleteAnd "I Can" "must have pleased President George W. Bush immensely"? Maybe if he didn't know the beat was sampled from "Impeach the President."
I considered nominating the Cleveland Steamer, but I guess that's more libertarian than conservative.
ReplyDeleteJonah would take the whole thing if sharts were eligible.
ReplyDeleteGotta give someone else a chance.
I'm beginning to believe that Roy is right and this is all a joke at AEI's expense.
ReplyDeleteDoes anyone know what kind of music conservatives currently hate and want to ban? I'd like to know what they're going to be writing approving bullshit about twenty years from now.
ReplyDeleteThis is actually part of the *real* list: top 2 conservative listening skills.
ReplyDelete2. Listen until you hear what you want to hear.
1. Ignore everything else.
On #5, is that them asking themselves that question? Because that would work too.
ReplyDeleteThat wasn't a song.
ReplyDeleteI'm as submissive as the next guy but SHIT PLAY IS OUT.
ReplyDeleteWaiting... Waiting...
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVikZ8Oe_XA
The movie Reds is conservative because red is a conservative color.
ReplyDeleteI guess it falls under the heading of "fear", but I really think xenophobia deserves its own entry.
ReplyDeleteYeah, Veuger's tone-deaf confirmation bias reading really is something to behold. If Tupac were still alive, he'd die laughing.
ReplyDeleteBanksta rap is awesomeness. Is that a real thing?
ReplyDeleteNeither are rappers. Ba-da-bing! I'm here all week; try the veal.
ReplyDelete#4 is up. It's Dr. Dre. I was gonna try to be funny but nothing is funnier than this:
ReplyDeleteNear the end of the song, all this culminates in a warning to wannabe revolutionaries everywhere: “Dr. Dre be the name / Still running the game.” And this extends, of course, to those who believe that a Marxist utopia can be established through democratically endorsed redistribution of wealth. As Dr. Young explains in “Forgot About Dre,” a song from his next album: “If it was up to me / You motherf****** would stop coming up to me / With your hands out lookin’ up to me / Like you want something free.”
You never see George F. Will quote something with the word "motherfucker" in it approvingly, so maybe this is a a sign of progress.
This is the Tupac who was a member of the Young Communist League of America?
ReplyDeleteThe conservatoid joy in the miserable poverty of others (relative to their own misbegotten wealth) hints that deep down, wherever they have beaten down the little bit of human soul they may still possess, they may feel a bit guilty. I mean they created and perpetuate this system, yet NEVER suggest any way to offer basic security to the lowest of the screwed.
ReplyDeleteBut probably not.
I wonder if they give the same line to their kids when they need food, shelter, or comfort? "Fend for yourselves, you lazy motherfuckers!"
Where do conservatoids draw the line between them that deserve humanity and them that don't? Wasn't the concept of a Brotherhood of Man what their xtian god supposed to expand for them? epic fail.
I second the motion. In all the winger dreck that Roy has so generously waded through on our behalf, I've never seen any evidence of self-awareness either.
ReplyDeletePlus it gives the conservatives the chance to say "nigger" win/win.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if they give the same line to their kids when they need food, shelter, or comfort? "Fend for yourselves, you lazy motherfuckers!"
ReplyDeleteYes.
Simple answers, etc. etc.
Good gosh, don't tell AEI about Dylan's Infidels.
ReplyDelete...that's so banksta.
ReplyDeleteI am just gonna have to throw away any membership cards that I thought I may have earned from any branch of the neologistismic societies of Amercia. It reminds me of a night when I saw a dude play the bass so well, I thought I should burn mine when I got home. Didn't pick up the thing for a year.
Thanks, really!
Good Day, Sir!.
...
Where do conservatoids draw the line between them that deserve humanity and them that don't?
ReplyDeleteI think you are referring to the conservative version of the Mendoza line in reverse. Anyone perceived to be getting more than their fair share who is not a member of its Tribe falls into the category of "...them that don't."
...
Oh come now.
ReplyDeleteAnd this extends, of course, to those who believe that a Marxist utopia can be established through democratically endorsed redistribution of wealth.
ReplyDeleteI call parody. And if I'm wrong about that, then I truly feel too sorry for this guy to bring myself to laugh at him.
I believe that's really supposed to be "Fuck tha jack-booted storm-troopers of Big Government."
ReplyDeleteToo late: See #12.
ReplyDeleteHOLEE SH!T.
ReplyDeleteI taught "Rap das Armas" as an example of baile funk to my students. It's glorification of the drug trafficking gangs in the favelas of Rio (specifically, a hill on Ilha do Governador, near the airport).
Here's my translation from the Portuguese of the opening verse:
"Palm Oil Hill is bad to invade
We, with those [from Complexo do] Alemão are going to have fun
Because on Palm Oil I’ll tell you how it is
Here there aren’t any softies [easy targets], even for the DRE [state anti-narcotics bureau]
Even the BOPE [Special Opps Battalion] fears coming up the hill
There aren’t softies for the army nor for the PM [Military Police]
I’m giving a better idea of it for my friends
But Palm Oil Hill is also God’s land
Faith in God, DJ!"
The song ends with a threat to use a grenade next time.
If you accept the notion that anger is really fueled by fear in the fight-or-flight response, it's fear all the way down.
ReplyDeleteDamn, as a crate digger I didn't even think about checking the beats.
ReplyDeleteWe'll have to check if any of the others sample "Black President" by James Brown.
Also, it's from 1994, not 2007. But that's the least of his problems.
ReplyDeleteWhat? No love for "resentment"? Which means "to feel AGAIN," so it's two (clap) two (clap) two emotions in one!
ReplyDeletePlus, they've never shown the least ability to be actually witty, amusing, funny, or astute when they *weren't* "joking." Which actually raises the question I thought of last night: Is there a wingnut equivalent of alicublog? Or even one that thinks it is?
ReplyDeleteIrmao! As if the American Enterprise Institute would have been on any side but that of the military dictatorship in the days of Tropicalia. Order FIRST. Then "Progress."
ReplyDeleteThey should just mention every rap song that mentions guns, money, and ho's, and call it a day. Those are the 3 right wing talking points, anyway.
ReplyDeleteAssata Shakur's child, named for the Tupac Amaru, if memory serves...
ReplyDeletethat's so banksta.
ReplyDeleteWhy yes, yes it is. When Stan Veuger (Ph.D., economics, Harvard) isn't bumping Tupac on the Metro, he's coming up out of the cut for your goods: "A balanced budget isn't necessary, but entitlement reform is."
Next up, he explains that Foster the People's "Pumped Up Kicks" is really about running for exercise.
ReplyDeleteGlen Reynolds? Dr. Mike? Rev Swank?
ReplyDeleteI personally think a "thirst for wanton machismo" ruined Fuck Tha Police - either the police are ruining your lives OR you're not at all afraid of those pigs, you cannot have it both ways, NWA, and no, now that you mention it, I would not say any of this to your faces - so I can sympathise with that. In between laughing at the whole enterprise. The whole Enterprise Institute (American)! Ba-da-ding!
ReplyDeleteMy favourite, which hunter-commenters from Lawyers, Guns, and Money pointed out (I'm staying so far in the boat I'm wrapped in blankets deep under the waterline), was the one about how when Dr. Dre told Eminem to shoot his unfaithful girlfriend and her lover, that represented a meaningful ethos and was, as such, totally conservative. Now, while I might be amenable to the point that fatal domestic violence is indeed a conservative virtue, I'm not sure I'd say it quite that brazenly, nor would I be pleased about it.
If this is trolling or parody, though, it's brilliantly done. If it's at all from the inside, we might have found the one right-winger with a sense of humour that extends beyond "that guy got hurt! it's funny!"
Who can parody right-wing screeds any more? We're living in the post "Poe" world. The fact is, it's gotten so that one can't even tell real Gary Ruppert from fake Gary Rupperts.
ReplyDeleteDubstep
ReplyDeleteBrilliant. Skrillex has already given us "Kill EVERYBODY", so I can write the piece for the National Review On Hypernet piece now and set it to submit automatically in 2033.
ReplyDeleteI like tax cuts, and I don’t know why.
ReplyDeleteFirmly on the side of supply!
When a guy walks in with a Milton Friedman book
All you CEOs take a look!
GOP hack!
Fucking libertarians, how do they work?
ReplyDeleteThey don't. They get sinecures at think tanks.
Nobody tell them that Paris Sous les Bombes is about graffiti instead of giving those cheese eating surrender monkeys what's what.
ReplyDeleteThis is a song that... if you really get down to it, reflects the conservative message of having a heavy handed federal government
ReplyDeleteJesus.
So in a song that's all about imbalance of power between races, you assume "the power" equals the Federal government?
Bonus points for ignoring "Gotta give us what we want, gotta give us what we need", which sounds kinda, uh, socialist?
And for ignoring the video, where the marchers are carrying a big poster of Angela Davis.
ReplyDeleteYou are quite the wordsmith, my swain.
ReplyDeleteLet me guess...the number one conservative shit of all time: Dick Cheney.
ReplyDeleteMakes you almost want to swallow the God hogwash and claim these pricks are really the spawn of Satan.
ReplyDelete" You motherf****** would stop coming up to me / With your hands out lookin’ up to me / Like you want something free.”
ReplyDeleteCool, Dr. Dre is channeling Ruth Brown doing "easy Chair"!