Tuesday, June 16, 2015

THERE'S SOMEONE FOR EVERYONE IN THIS WORLD.

Donald Trump threw his hairpiece in the ring today, and most people reacted with the solemnity the event demanded. Even Republicans seem to grasp that Trump's insertion is no blessing on their chances in 2016.  But Trump has a few friends among the conservative elite. Jeffrey Lord of the American Spectator is here to tell you smart-alecks that Trump has the love of the people:
The other day, Trump took a stroll outside of his iconic Trump Tower with Fox and Friends co-host Brian Kilmeade. Not surprisingly there were everyday folk instantly swarming to Trump. They wanted a picture, they wanted a handshake, they wanted to have a word. At one point, standing on Fifth Avenue, Trump is flagged by the driver of a lumber truck. “I know you!” the driver says with a laugh and a grin. 
Why? Why this Grand Canyon-size gap between media and political elites and average Americans when it comes to the subject of Donald Trump?
#1: This is probably the first time since 9/11 that anyone at the Spectator referred to New Yorkers as "average Americans." #2: I can easily see the same rubber-necking and gawking visited upon your average Kardashian, but I'm not sure what that means for their national electoral chances. (If Trump stayed out there a couple of days, he'd probably be getting the same reactions those guys who dress up as Elmo get at Rockefeller Center.)
Why is it that he is consistently underestimated whether the subject is his financial worth or his political viability? 
The answer in this corner is that Donald Trump is seen by many Americans as the very embodiment of the American Dream. Someone with vision and drive who settles down and focuses, working hard day in and day out to make his own dreams come true. And succeeding. When millions of average Americans look at Donald Trump — they see — shocker! — themselves.
If I were the American people, I'd sue for defamation. Also hot for Trump: Ben Shapiro. Yes, despite his defenestration from TruthRevolt, his prose lives on at Breitbart.com, where he has a "top seven moments from Trump’s speech." I dusted them for irony and came up empty. Example:
“I Don’t Need Anybody’s Money. It’s Nice…I’m Really Rich.” This, in a nutshell, is what makes Trump awesome. Trump may be the only candidate in the race who isn’t ashamed of being wealthy. He sees wealth as something Americans should strive for and be proud of, not something Americans should degrade. Trump also said that he had lobbyists who could get him any policy he wanted, and that as president, because of his wealth, he wouldn’t be beholden to anyone. If Trump actually sticks to this pitch, he’d do a true service to America, where Mitt Romney is supposed to act contrite for earning lots of money and creating lots of jobs...
I bet the guy in the lumber truck loved it. Shapiro is bullish on Trump's chances: "Trump must understand that he’s seen as a clown by the media – he’s too smart not to see that," he analyzes. (How'd David Horowitz let this guy go?)  "But being seen as a clown can be advantageous, because it comes with zero expectations of actual substance. Every gaffe by Jeb Bush throws mud on his skirt; every lucid moment from Trump elevates him..." Someone should check Lord's and Shapiro's bank accounts and see if they made any big deposits lately.

At Legal Insurrection, Amy Miller:
I think that most strategists would agree that a candidate who flaunts his wealth in the way that Trump has could prove problematic with the voting base. That being said -- at this point, why not try it?
She has a point. What if Mitt Romney had gone around lighting cigars with $100 bills, or paying children to dance for him?
...I may not understand what it feels like to own a yacht (anyone have a yacht I can borrow to test this?) but I do understand what it feels like to earn enough money to make a major purchase, or treat myself to a luxury item. Why shouldn’t he be proud of his towers in the same way I’m proud of the things I’ve earned?
I sweated and I saved and I was finally able to come up with $100,000 to pay off my $20,000 credit card debt from the 1990s. In another ten years I may be able to pay for this appendectomy, and then I'll be even more sympathetic to Donald Trump!
...as a wonk, I’m interested to see how his campaign plans on introducing Trump the Man to the American people.
My sources tell me Trump will do a listening tour where he hits the town halls, walks up to random voters, and offers them a million dollars to let him sleep with their wives.

Other conservative writers have less motivation to praise Trump and grimly make do with whatever dog-ends are available. At Hot Air, Allahpundit says Trump is a creature of the liberal media, who inflate him only as an excuse for "not having to cover more credible candidates like Rubio who pose a legit threat to Her Majesty. My guess is they’ll give him plenty of oxygen." If only someone could read this to Trump so he'd know what a patsy he's been played for!

194 comments:

  1. Bethany Spencer3:52 PM

    You can't build the clown car, stock it with clowns, then complain when people wanna eat popcorn and watch the show.

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  2. "My sources tell me Trump will do a listening tour where he hits the town halls, walks up to random voters, and offers them a million dollars to let him sleep with their wives."


    That might be the best line I've read about the Presidential race so far.

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  3. edroso3:58 PM

    Thank you!

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  4. I dusted them for irony and came up empty.

    You're supposed to dust them with Cheetos powder, Roy.
    ~

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  5. BTW, I saw the announcement. Trump went on about our debt with China.

    As President, Trump can do for us what he did for himself his companies...declare bankruptcy every time the debt becomes a problem.
    ~

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  6. Cato the Censor4:18 PM

    Silly me. After all these decades and I still had no idea Donald Trump (the "Donald") was a working class hero after all!

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  7. https://artandhistory.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/trump.jpg

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  8. Trump may be the only candidate in the race who isn’t ashamed of being wealthy.

    Sorry, Ben, we're going to have to disqualify this little piece of gush on the grounds that Donald Trump is incapable of feeling shame.

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  9. Gromet4:19 PM

    as president, because of his wealth, he wouldn’t be beholden to anyone.


    How true, well thunk out, conservatard! It is the wealthy who are truly beholden to no one, what with their fortunes so fully independent of the nuance of tax and liability law, international supply lines, global finance, the political stability of brutal dictators willing to build cheap factories, and the favor of quirky and demanding investors and partners both past and potential. Whew. No way we should ever elect a guy who depends on a salary to get by -- that guy's gonna be owned by every rich jerk and sinister corporation in the world!

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  10. https://gilmanpark.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/trump-combover.png

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  11. “I Don’t Need Anybody’s Money. It’s Nice…I’m Really Rich.”

    No doubt about it: I want a president who has the amazing distinction of running a casino and going bankrupt because apparently EVERYONE beat the house. Indeed, I want a president who has gone bankrupt not once, not twice, but multiple times.

    I can see it now: the Trump-Fiorina fusion ticket. With that kind of fusion, it's stupid that's too cheap to meter.

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  12. alboy24:32 PM

    Since when is it the "American Dream" to be born in to fabulous wealth, and then trash at least half of that inheritance with bad investments and Chinese banking partners? Also, too, Ben Shapiro is a brainless idiot; why pay any attention to anything he spits out of his keyboard? Keep up the good work, Roy, I, for one, appreciate your ability to administer a well-deserved whipping. Trump for President? When pigs fly....

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  13. LittlePig4:34 PM

    Ain't no griftin' like GOP griftin'.

    Wonder when Caribou Barbie will announce.

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  14. LittlePig4:37 PM

    Hmmmmm....does The Donald sport a Merkin?

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  15. mortimer20004:38 PM

    Shapiro: where Mitt Romney is supposed to act contrite for earning lots of money and creating lots of jobs...

    Au contraire, Benny -- Bain doesn't create jobs, it creates wealth for its owners by destroying them. Remember When Mitt Romney Came to Town, a little film put together by none other than Winning Our Future, noted lefty Newt Gingrich's SuperPAC funded by Shapiro heartthrob Sheldon Adelson.

    as president, because of his wealth, [Trump] wouldn’t be beholden to anyone

    Donald says he's going to fund his own campaign, meaning he would owe favors to the last person on earth you'd want a President to be in thrall to: Donald Trump.

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  16. John Griffone4:39 PM

    Bravo

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  17. Lord: "...it is Trump’s Reaganesque optimism for his country... and It is this kind of wisdom — the kind of thinking that was a Reagan trademark...

    It's this sort of hemorrhoid-pickin' finger-sniffin' political punditin' that makes following US politics so very, very rewarding.

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  18. coozledad4:43 PM

    -They wanted a picture, they wanted a handshake, they wanted to have a word. At one point, standing on Fifth Avenue, Trump is flagged by a heavily bearded man in a loincloth. "I know you! You're that guy And that's that Kilmeade asshole.. Now give me something for my sweet-itch."

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  19. John Wesley Hardin4:45 PM

    "...as a wonk, I’m interested to see how his campaign plans on introducing Trump the Man to the American people." Huh, she misspelled 'wank.'

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  20. No way we should ever elect a guy who depends on a salary to get by -- that guy's gonna be owned by every rich jerk and sinister corporation in the world!
    Reminiscent of the old half-serious joke that we should start being honest and just elect lobbyists directly to Congress.

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  21. I wasn't nearly good enough this year to warrant such a gift...

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  22. coozledad4:50 PM

    I’m interested to see how his campaign plans on introducing Trump the Man to the American people

    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/26/Ford_Madox_Brown_-_%60Take_your_Son,_Sir'_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg

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  23. satch4:56 PM

    "The answer in this corner is that Donald Trump is seen by many Americans
    as the very embodiment of the American Dream. Someone with vision and
    drive who settles down and focuses, yadda yadda yadda blah de blah..."


    Jesus... the people who love Donald Trump are the same people who, when the professional sports team team from their city wins the Super World Stanley Cup Bowl Series, pile into the streets yelling "WE WON!!!", as if THEY had actually caught the winning pass or scored the winning goal. Trump is the stand-in for millions of folks who have little to hope for in their own lives, and are so beaten down that they're content to bask in the light reflected from Trump's golden pelt. They'll buy anything he's selling because he's such a blatant carney barker, they'll think he MUST be able to deliver because why else would he make such fantasmagorical claims. Fortunately, there's not enough of these poor souls to actually elect Trump, even if they could all get institutional day passes on election day to go vote.

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  24. coozledad4:59 PM

    Well they make you pay taxes
    and they laugh at your debt
    and they say 'shut yer gob'
    you bald, vulgar get.
    A working class hero is something to be
    if you wanna be a hero
    loan some money to me.

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  25. Helmut Monotreme5:07 PM

    The clown car is almost crowded enough. Here's hoping for a freak meteorite come debate night.

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  26. M. Krebs5:09 PM

    They're gonna need a bigger car. Maybe a short bus.

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  27. Howlin Wolfe5:09 PM

    I think his "hair," or whatever that thing on his head is, will run for president after the Donald has fallen off the plane of the living. Like Snake's hair in "The Simpsons," it's got a life of its own.

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  28. smut clyde5:17 PM

    Every gaffe by Jeb Bush throws mud on his skirt; every lucid moment from Trump elevates him...
    World needs moar "Vote Trump -- He Has Lucid Moments" memes.

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  29. John Wesley Hardin5:18 PM

    I like Allahpundit's er, logic: 'The media is covering Trump to obscure Marco Rubio's electability.' Who are the other "credible" candidates who can run against Hillary Clinton without being laughed out of the election booth? From reading the rest of his column, he probably means Scott Walker or JEB! Yeah, it sure is a shame how little coverage JEB! is getting from the media. Walker? Not much about him in the news but then he hasn't even announced that he's running yet. As for Rubio, he's even less likely to be the GOP nominee for President than Ted Cruz.

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  30. JennOfArk5:18 PM

    Now that Trump's in, it will be a clown limo.

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  31. smut clyde5:19 PM

    because of his wealth, he wouldn’t be beholden to anyone.
    Wasn't that Schwartzenegger's main platform plank? How well did that work out for Californian governance?

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  32. John Wesley Hardin5:19 PM

    Exceptionally so.

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  33. JennOfArk5:20 PM

    It's a toupee, crafted of the finest wild-sourced orangutan hair from Borneo, collected by starving orphans.

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  34. But being seen as a clown can be advantageous, because it comes with zero expectations of actual substance. Every gaffe by Jeb Bush throws mud on his skirt; every lucid moment from Trump elevates him



    these are all of the metaphors

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  35. JennOfArk5:21 PM

    Bumpersticker: "Short-Fingered Vulgarian 2016"

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  36. smut clyde5:23 PM

    Ben Shapiro is a brainless idiot; why pay any attention to anything he spits out of his keyboard?
    He's a brainless idiot for hire, so his emissions are an indication of money-shovelling in progress.

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  37. Bizarro Mike5:29 PM

    I think this is why the middle of the nut-o-sphere loves Trump. They recognize a fellow grifter.

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  38. philadelphialawyer5:30 PM

    Yeah, and Trump did more than merely lose his own money (which, as you say, he mostly inherited in the first place). Companies with his name on it and that he ran filed for bankruptcy four times! Not only did other corporate dirtbags and banks lose money, but so did workers, small businessmen, etc,, on each one of Trump's corporate flops. And in at least one of the cases there was more than a little evidence that Trump himself should have been held personally liable for the losses.
    At least Romney was a successful corporate predator. What is Trump? He's a joke, even in the business world. A celebrity. Famous for being rich and for being a bad businessman, and for saying "You're fired!" (HA! HA!) on TV.
    That actual Repub operatives and pundits would even try to make a case for him almost beggars the imagination. Even from their POV, one would think, maybe even especially from their POV, his running for president in their party is part spectacle and part disaster.

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  39. gocart mozart5:31 PM

    “We’re having a very hard time making sense of the speech,” the ISIS spokesman said. “He talked about defeating us, but it seemed like what he was saying was pretty specific to hotels.”

    Minutes after the statement was released, Trump responded that the fact that he had confused ISIS “means I’m already winning the war against it.”

    “In every one of my hotels, you’ve got elevators,” Trump said. “Some of them go up, some of them go down. ISIS is going down.”

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  40. gocart mozart5:34 PM

    Billionaire real estate mogul and television personality
    Donald Trump announced Tuesday plans to run in the 2016 presidential
    election, marking the first time he will formally seek the Republican
    nomination after floating the idea in several previous election cycles.
    Here are some key facts to know about Trump:
    Wife: Unsatisfied

    Net Worth: 3-4 presidential elections

    Claim To Fame: First to refer to ISIS as “bozos”

    Role: Billionaire who will have smallest impact on presidential race

    Campaign Promise: Will turn America into an opulent destination for only the most exclusive citizens

    Campaign Slogan: “I’m Going To Do This Every Four Years Until I Die”

    Credentials: Proven job creator for desperate people who will do anything to be famous

    Potential Liability: American people may not yet be progressive enough to elect mentally ill man

    Vision For Presidency: 50 Miss USA finalists lined up along White House portico

    Are We Just Enabling Him: Yes
    -The Onion

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  41. What finer praise for a potential leader of the Free World: He has lucid moments. By all means, let's give this man the nuclear codes. I mean, what could possibly go wrong?

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  42. coozledad5:36 PM

    every lucid moment from Trump elevates him
    We stopped saying that about gramps about the time he started flinging his feces at the walls.

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  43. Bethany Spencer5:37 PM

    all the other candidates are going to hate having "TRUMP" emblazoned on their foreheads.

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  44. gocart mozart5:38 PM

    ttps://search.yahoo.com/yhs/search?p=trump+orangutan&ei=UTF-8&hspart=mozilla&hsimp=yhs-003

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  45. smut clyde5:39 PM

    Shapiro is trying to appeal to Reagan nostalgia.

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  46. That actual Repub operatives and pundits would even try to make a case for him almost beggars the imagination.

    They love that the stupid is strong with this one.

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  47. Back when oceans somehow protected us from intercontinental ballistic missiles. Or at least that's what the last Republican president told us.

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  48. Gromet5:43 PM

    Arnold actually wasn't too bad for us. He tried to get his party to be more moderate -- they refused, and there was no progress for six years. But that's better than regress. He did tell Bush to buzz off when Bush asked him to send the Calif. Nat'l Guard to stop immigration -- I liked that.

    Of course, after he left, the Dems achieved a supermajority in the legislature and Jerry Brown became gov, and magically we are no longer in financial collapse. Huh, go figure. You'd think only extreme conservatives could manage a triumph like that...

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  49. coozledad5:47 PM

    The excruciating buildup to one of those "moments of lucidity"?

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  50. Perhaps even more delicious than Trump declaring is the media shitstorm whipped up by his big empty bouffant.


    This morning on CNN the nice anchor-lady asked if the media will pay any attention to Trump as a GOP primary candidate in that delightful doubtful news-serious way, and then minutes later she told us, without irony and in breathless-anticipation newsreader mode, that Trump will be Jake Trapper's special guest later on CNN!


    Some argue that technology has our current culture perched on the most entertaining times in human history, but I'd argue the technology is simply a delivery system for the best free entertainment in the world...

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  51. billcinsd5:57 PM

    you got some 'splainin' to do lucid

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  52. Proposed slogan:
    Sometimes being wealthy: it's the least shameful thing about him!

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  53. Didn't Earl Butz get in some kind of trouble for joking about loose id?

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  54. Not a Clown Victoria?

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  55. Jay B.6:09 PM

    Arnold was a fucking catastrophe. He was utterly uninterested in governing at all and was completely inept at it. The wreckage he left behind gave us the supermajority we needed to be a semi-functional state again.

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  56. smut clyde6:09 PM

    A veritable charabanc.

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  57. ohsopolite6:10 PM

    In other news, the flannel moth caterpillar also declared its candidacy, stating that not only did it look similar to, yet better than whatever that is on top of Mr. Trump's head, but that its qualifications for office were superior to Mr. Trump's.

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  58. ohsopolite6:11 PM

    Satire just keeps getting more difficult.

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  59. HankP6:12 PM

    I'm not 100% sure, but I think this is the sign that we've reached Peak Asshole.

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  60. ohsopolite6:12 PM

    3...2...

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  61. Jay B.6:15 PM

    ...as a wonk, I’m interested to see how his campaign plans on introducing Trump the Man to the American people.


    If only he had some public presence over the years...


    I mean this is the stupidest thing that's ever been written. He's a loudmouthed billionaire who has been in the public eye for 35 years and hosted a fucking TV show. THAT'S HIS BRAND. He fires people in public for a living.

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  62. JohnMyroro6:18 PM

    Sometimes I suspect Trump is doing this tongue-in-cheek. That we are all being Poe'd. Maybe he's the Colbert of Republican presidential candidates.

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  63. Debate night is the freak meteorite.

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  64. M. Krebs6:31 PM

    Perfect.

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  65. I so wish this were true. My inner cynic, however, is of the mind that we are not even close...
    ..,

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  66. tigrismus6:35 PM

    Really, Trump? Can a presidential campaign even declare bankruptcy?

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  67. What if Mitt Romney had gone around lighting cigars with $100 bills,Someone from the Quorums [sic] of the Seventy would have paid him a visit to remind him about tobacco?
    or paying children to dance for him?Q: Why do conservative Mormons oppose child slavery?


    A: Because it could lead to dancing.

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  68. Ellis_Weiner6:37 PM

    "When millions of average Americans look at Donald Trump — they see — shocker! — themselves."

    That must be it. That must be why they flock to shake his hand and have their picture taken with him--the same way they flock to each other to shake hands with each other and have their pictures taken with each other. Ever see a crowd at a Yankee game? All they do is shake each other's hands and pose for pictures. It's sweet.


    (Also: "iconic"? Sure--in the sense that "Piss Christ" is an icon of artistic blasphemy and fraudulence. Who is this Jeffrey Lord? And why is he so stupid? I'll take my answer off the air.)

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  69. Moral and intellectual bankruptcy? All the time.

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  70. gocart mozart6:39 PM

    Trump / Busey 2016
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4KQi0h2rJ8c

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  71. smut clyde6:40 PM

    Dibs on the word "Charabancruptcy".

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  72. ohsopolite6:40 PM

    In order for that to be true, you'd also have to suspect that he possesses sufficient wit for the task, which, as they say, Assumes Facts Not In Evidence.

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  73. Nope, sorry, the curve is ...


    [PUTS ON SUNGLASSES]


    ... assymptotic.

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  74. Ellis_Weiner6:41 PM

    Those on Twitter might find the insights of @TrumpsRug illuminating, now that Trump is in it to win it.

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  75. gocart mozart6:42 PM

    That's Miss Jackson if you're nasty.

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  76. Ellis_Weiner6:42 PM

    FTW.

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  77. MarkBarton6:42 PM

    I thought I had heard that Trump hates shaking hands and avoids it whenever possible. Or do I have him confused with someone else?

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  78. RogerAiles6:44 PM

    I want a handshake with Trump just to trigger his OCD. I'll tell him I shit in it minutes earlier just to up the ante.

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  79. MarkBarton6:44 PM

    He has a talent for destroying businesses. He almost singlehandedly sunk the USFL, which had been a successful minor league before he bankrupted not only his team, but every other team in the league.

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  80. gocart mozart6:45 PM

    Pretty soon the we'll have to tone down the silliness in the satire to make it credible.

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  81. M. Krebs6:45 PM

    I dunno. That would imply that it will eventually level off. I think the question is whether it's O(x^n).

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  82. gocart mozart6:46 PM

    I heard that too.

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  83. Ellis_Weiner6:46 PM

    "I'm a fucking flannel moth. Not only am I not beholden to special interests, I don't even know what that means."

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  84. Jay B.6:47 PM

    It wasn't successful, but it was in its infancy. His thought to buy Flutie and Herschel Walker set the league into a bidding war with the NFL. He also, I believe, was the one who set out to sue the NFL over anti-trust violations and won -- $3.

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  85. I agree with that.

    The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has limits...

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  86. Ellis_Weiner6:49 PM

    Good pernt. Also, "lucid moments" sounds like the name of a Melachrino Strings songs-for-lovers album, so there's that in Trump's favor.

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  87. more credible candidates like Rubio who pose a legit threat to Her Majesty.No matter how silly we Americans might find the idea of a constitutional monarchy, it's still not cool to make threats to Queen Elizabeth---
    [Whisper, whisper]
    --Oh, ha ha, yes. Whien a billionaire scion of inherited wealth announces his presidential run, joining someone who's the brother and son of previous presidents, let's make sure to point out that Hillarywater! I drink it up!"

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  88. Now that I think about it... I can't think of ANYONE that seemed like he (or she) was ashamed of being wealthy.

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  89. MarkBarton6:51 PM

    It was Trump's idea to move their season to coincide with the NFL's. When they were playing in the spring and summer, they had no competition, and could have done just fine while building their brand. When they went head-to-head against the NFL, they got destroyed.

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  90. Trump may be the only candidate in the race who isn’t ashamed of being wealthy.Well, except for Hillary, who is a corrupt elitist because of all the money the Clintons have.

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  91. Jay B.6:52 PM

    That's absolutely true and I forgot about that.

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  92. I think we have the Donald's debate-winning line right there.

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  93. Ellis_Weiner6:54 PM

    Also "Queens-Born Casino Operator."

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  94. smut clyde6:56 PM

    Ms Clinton has acquired the wealth that is necessary to run for the presidency, but it was not handed to her by billionaires in the only legitimatet path of acquisition

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  95. AGoodQuestion6:57 PM

    Not surprisingly there were everyday folk instantly swarming to Trump. They wanted a picture, they wanted a handshake, they wanted to have a word. At one point, standing on Fifth Avenue, Trump is flagged by the driver of a lumber truck. “I know you!” the driver says with a laugh and a grin.


    I guess this is intended as a contrast to what would happen if Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton or Elizabeth Warren walked down a city street with a docile journalist: Average Americans keeping an eight-yard distance, avoiding eye contact or any other contact, and muttering "God, this used to be a nice neighborhood."

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  96. AGoodQuestion7:01 PM

    I'm trying to think of what the meme-makers could use as a graphic. If he's had lucid moments they weren't captured on camera. (Note to self: vampire lucidity?)

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  97. AGoodQuestion7:05 PM

    Victoria Jackson will be leading Trump's star brigade, otherwise manned by the more desperate alumni of Celebrity Apprentice.

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  98. GeniusLemur7:11 PM

    "Why is it that he is consistently underestimated whether the subject is his financial worth or his political viability?"

    Because he's been bankrupt about as many times as Liz Taylor got married, and the list of people from his intimate circle who loathe him is a mile long?

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  99. GeniusLemur7:12 PM

    "Trump has the love of the people"
    In the sense that he needs crowds to worship him to feed his gigantic ego.

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  100. Mike McCarthy7:22 PM

    There's no way trump is worth $8.7 billion. I can't wait for Republican oppo research on that.

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  101. montag27:22 PM

    "Why this Grand Canyon-size gap between media and political elites and
    average Americans when it comes to the subject of Donald Trump?"

    Umm, because Trump is the poster boy for the loudmouthed idiots with money sell-a-thon? Because Fox thinks he's the bee's knees? Because, even as a rich person, he sucks finance ditchwater?

    Because he's just about the only person in an Armani suit in NYC that still looks like a clown? Because everyone with an IQ below his 92 thinks he's reeeeally, reeeally smaht? Because Fox wants us all to genuflect before people of wealth, even the truly idiotic ones?

    Because Brian Kilmeade is a hopeless celebrity-struck dork?

    We report. You decide.

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  102. FMguru7:37 PM

    Ahh-nuld tried to pass a whole bunch of Heritage/Cato/ALEC-drafted supply side amendments to the state constitution through the ballot initiative process, even calling a special election and tirelessly campaigning for them. Every single one was shot down by voters, and he completely gave up on giving a shit about being Governor immediately afterwards.

    One of his last acts was to appear at the victory parade for the San Francisco Giants' 2010 World Series championship, and he was all but booed and hooted off the stage.

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  103. ohsopolite7:40 PM

    Once had a Lincoln Town Car as a shop loaner for a few days, quickly dubbed it Stinkin' Clown Car. A small fleet of those should do nicely.

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  104. redoubtagain7:41 PM

    You mean we stopped?

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  105. Randy Gibbons7:46 PM

    Why is it that he is consistently underestimated whether the subject is his [1] financial worth or his [2] political viability?


    [1] Trump cares about his financial worth because it's evidence of how awesome he is. Most people don't care about the number, or whether he exaggerates it, or whether others underestimate it. The number could change substantially in the time it'd take you to do the accounting.


    [2] When people truly believe in their own political viability, they run for office. Some don't run for lack of resources or a constituency; Trump has always insisted he has plenty of both. But he doesn't run. Sentient beings have long since concluded that either he has other motives for his fakeouts, or secretly knows he's not politically viable. The whole spectacle overshadows (trumps?) any estimations of his wholly theoretical viability.


    The sentence is embarrassing to read; if I had composed it, I'd probably disappear in a puff of foul-smelling smoke, an unearthly scream receding to nothingness. And I've debased myself pretty shamefully. But then, my vision is awful in its clarity.


    The answer in this corner is that Donald Trump is seen by many Americans as the very embodiment of the American Dream. Someone with vision and drive who settles down and focuses, working hard day in and day out to make his own dreams come true. And succeeding. When millions of average Americans look at Donald Trump — they see — shocker! — themselves.


    The American Dream was not to become a monomaniacal freak like Trump. People wanted a modest house, paid off by retirement; a car or two, some toys; the occasional vacation ... they wanted to be able to raise kids in a decent setting and send them to decent schools and maybe to college. A secure job, not too dehumanizing ... to be a citizen in a fair sense of the word ... stuff like that.


    These days we're told to throw away those dreams (not so modest-seeming any more: I doubt I will live to attain them) in exchange for a world where Trump can exist ... And lemme ask: couldn't we describe, say, Vlad Putin the same way? Or Vlad the Impaler?

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  106. Dead_Andy_Breitbart7:47 PM

    This is gonna be one weird election.

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  107. J Neo Marvin7:48 PM

    Worked so well for Dubya...for a while.

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  108. redoubtagain7:49 PM

    Campaign Slogan: “I’m Going To Do This Every Four Years Until I Die”

    Hopefully with Harold Stassen's hairpiece.

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  109. Anyone wanna make some book on which of the other candidates will take a swing at T. Rump on the debate Q&A stage?

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  110. gocart mozart7:54 PM

    In other News:

    “With regard to climate change, progress has been deplorably scarce. ...
    The reduction of greenhouse gases requires honesty, courage and responsibility, especially by the most powerful and the most polluting
    countries.”
    - Pope Francis


    “We know that it is impossible to sustain the current level of consumption in the more developed countries and the wealthiest parts of society, where the habit of waste and of throwing things away is reaching unprecedented levels.”
    - Pope Francis


    Every wingnut calls for keeping religion out of politics in 4,3,2, ,,,

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  111. Bears a resemblance to Mr. Chris "Tweety" Matthews's thinning 'do as well.

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  112. Gabriel Ratchet8:07 PM

    I wasn't aware any kind of thinking was a Reagan trademark ...

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  113. The capacity of the human mind/mouth (if not humanity itself) for the awful, hideous & stupid is close enough to infinite not to matter, & as the droolers & reactionaries become further marginalized they'll only turn it up to 12 or 13.

    If Mme. Sec'y. Clinton is elected I won't be in the least surprised if the 2020 Republican candidates decide the dog whistles aren't working any longer & start using actual N (& other)-words, in the spirit of George "I will not be out-niggered again" Wallace.

    Can't wait.

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  114. montag28:13 PM

    Well, he's right in one sense. That kind of thinking is very Reaganesque. The rest of us would offer a well-informed quibble or two about it being thinking as most of us understand the term, and would probably define it--sans cue cards--as "stream of consciousness drivel firmly anchored in a lifetime of habitual fabrication and fantasy."

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  115. coozledad8:24 PM

    "Too much magic" bus.

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  116. montag28:27 PM

    Poe's Law is a booger, ain't it?

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  117. billcinsd8:39 PM

    technically, I think it's the Congressional losers that become lobbyists, with far fewer lobbyists elected to Congress. or we elect future lobbyists, not past lobbyists

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  118. JennOfArk8:44 PM

    I wish I could upvote that a thousand times. I read that happy crappy about the American Dream and said "whaaaa.....?"


    As to point [1], if any of you have been watching Silicon Valley, Donald Trump = Russ Hannaman.

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  119. montag28:46 PM

    Ah, but one must remember that this is all filtered through the eyes and brains of the worst imaginable fanboys and fangirls of the rich, people who think that being smart is the same thing as being rich enough to pay smart people to hire smart lawyers when one has been exceedingly stupid and has gotten into big trouble.

    It begins to make sense if you think of them all as 12-year-old boys, the world as the Mickey Mouse Club, and rich people as Annette Funicello.

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  120. hellslittlestangel8:48 PM

    He hasn't actually filed with the FEC.



    And he never will.

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  121. M. Krebs9:09 PM

    Goddammit, I already miss Dave.

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  122. montag29:10 PM

    I would guess: every one of the ones who've locked in their own billionaire by that time.

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  123. montag29:12 PM

    Because Trump wants us all to know he can afford the very, very best.

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  124. montag29:15 PM

    Presumably he could not finish because he was busy yelling over the noise of the flames, "Stop raping me!"

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  125. M. Krebs9:38 PM

    These days we're told to throw away those dreams (not so modest-seeming any more: I doubt I will live to attain them) in exchange for a world where Trump can exist ...


    ... and where everybody can have their dumbass tastes catered to on their 56 inch TV and their half-baked utterances vaulted into the ether via Twitter.

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  126. M. Krebs9:39 PM

    Yes. You'd think they'd have a hard time topping 2012, but nooooo.

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  127. M. Krebs9:42 PM

    Too bad they're immune to cognitive dissonance. Else...
    https://youtu.be/pjnZO5ZgWE8

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  128. That's because he's going to buy the FEC.

    And the FCC, FTC and FAA while he's at it.

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  129. MCSquared10:01 PM

    He settled the state's suit against Enron for pennies on the dollar.

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  130. philadelphialawyer10:03 PM

    I guess, but I see it more like a 12 year boy saying the most attractive woman on Gilligan's Island is neither Mary Ann nor Ginger, but is actually Mrs. Howell! Even 12 year old boys have some sense of discernment.

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  131. ...as a wonk, I’m interested to see how his campaign plans on introducing Trump the Man to the American people.


    Via trebuchet would be my choice.

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  132. How appropriate, since Trump is an enormous ass.
    The family name Megalopygidae and genus name Megalopyge are derived from the Greek roots Megalo (large) and pygidium (rump)

    http://entnemdept.ufl.edu/Creatures/MISC/MOTHS/puss.htm

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  133. JennOfArk10:30 PM

    I watched his very first show with Bill Murray last night.

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  134. JennOfArk10:36 PM

    Woodchipper was my thought, but trebuchet is better - it wouldn't require the viewer discretion tag.

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  135. billcinsd10:50 PM

    Oh come on. Trump only takes gift grift there is no way any one is loaning him anything but hair follicles

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  136. Vote Ogre, he has lusid moments

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QO0pw6MCxBU

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  137. AGoodQuestion11:56 PM

    A brief Google search reveals that the "Make America Great Again" is pretty much a direct steal from Reagan's campaigns, which Trump is no doubt nostalgic for because the Reagan era was when the media started its baffling fascination with him.

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  138. smut clyde12:25 AM

    You're either on the bus or under the bus.

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  139. smut clyde12:30 AM

    Donald Trump is seen by many Americans as the very embodiment of the American Dream
    "Inherit loads of money and piss half of it away on self-aggrandisement, with regular bankruptcies to shaft those people who were stupid enough to lend you more money." That's not a "dream", that's the American Infantile Wish-Fulfilment Fantasy. Or perhaps the American Wet Dream.

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  140. JennOfArk1:22 AM

    Also....

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  141. Hey! At least he's got opposable thumbs
    !

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  142. Harry Rumbold2:05 AM

    Papoon for President! "He's not Insane"!

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  143. ...I may not understand what it feels like to own a yacht (anyone have a yacht I can borrow to test this?) but I do understand what it feels like to earn enough money to make a major purchase, or treat myself to a luxury item. Why shouldn’t he be proud of his towers in the same way I’m proud of the things I’ve earned?

    I hear James O'Keefe has a boat she could check out.

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  144. montag22:58 AM

    Like modern economic theory, the costs are hidden away in "externalities."

    The true costs of this "entertainment" are actually quite dear, incrementally expensive, and irretrievable. And that's just the cumulative toll on one's sanity. The money lost forever is something else again.

    I laugh at these sorry excuses for human beings, but I don't think they're funny.

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  145. waspuppet5:41 AM

    Trump is the only Republican the mainstream press is allowed to treat like a clown, and the best moment of the 2016 campaign will come at the first GOP debate, when he's on the stage and no "serious" candidate will actually disagree with him on anything. I think even Chuck Todd and Mark Halperin will have to notice. Well, no - not Halperin.

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  146. coozledad6:02 AM

    A fuckin' busload of 'em.

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  147. "And up there over the john I want a big bunch of nymphs."

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  148. Jaime Oria6:54 AM

    Sure, they're brothers in crass oafishness (and, I'd argue while wearing Jean Baudrillard's skin, equally fictional), but Russ does invest money in something with potential innovative worth. Pied Piper isn't another classy, yooge and super-classy hotel & casino or hyper-priced condo.

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  149. If noting else, perhaps Trump's candidacy will finally get average Americans to understand how insanely the laws are stacked against them. Run up $60,000 in credit-card debt and $35,000 in student loan debt and then declare bankruptcy. You'll find most of your debts are inescapable because bankruptcy "reform" made unsecured credit "secured" through you having lifetime court-ordered payment plans.

    But if you have a net worth of $250 million and debts of $750 million, you can declare bankruptcy and pretty much keep it all (minus legal fees). That's the real secret to Trump's success, and I hope Americans come to see him as the poster child for how the wealthy live under a completely different set of laws.

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  150. This is America, where money is prima facie evidence of smarts. If you have lots of money--no matter how you acquired it--you must be smart.

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  151. Well, that's sure to get him the cat and dog vote--at least they'll know that as president, The Donald can open dinner for them.

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  152. Oh, it wasn't even stream of consciousness. The addled bastard had fucking cue cards with even his most banal statements written on them so that he could appear to have a few brain cells engaged.

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  153. Re: Rubio: I actually met him at a fundraiser back when he was just a wee little aspiring Republican rat. Spend any time talking to him and you soon find yourself gazing into his eyes, looking deep within to catch a glimpse of the clown on the unicycle that rides around and around in his head. The only problem is that the floor on which the clown is trying to ride the unicycle is strewn with banana peels and bricks.

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  154. More likely, you'll be hearing more and more about how The Pope just doesn't know anything about Catholicism, God, or The Bible. In fact, The Pope is a damn scientist, fer Christ's sake!

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  155. I think the function here is e to the eeewwwwww!

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  156. He started with nothing and decided he really liked it that way.

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  157. With hot-and-cold running dildos.

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  158. redoubtagain7:33 AM

    Why shouldn’t he be proud of his towers in the same way I’m proud of the things I’ve earned?

    Edgar Allen Poe would like a word.

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  159. Or, as a guest on Ed Schultz's program a couple of days ago put it: "Nobody is more closely tied to corporate money than the Clintons." 'Course, that guest writes for an outlet funded by the Heritage Foundation, so her bonas are definitely fides.

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  160. Yeah, well, TV used to be free. Now we have to pay for it, whether we like it or not.

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  161. glennisw9:09 AM

    Congress is the lobbyist training school.

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  162. satch9:11 AM

    "... we should start being honest and just elect lobbyists directly to Congress."


    That's exactly what the push for term limits is all about.

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  163. BigHank539:17 AM

    Wait, you mean Donald Trump isn't the physical embodiment of Satire itself?

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  164. BigHank539:24 AM

    Do you remember Jesus? Pretty much the lead character for the New Testament. Name one fucking thing that the GOP has done recently that Jesus would be square with.

    If you can blow off the fuckin' guy your faith is named after, it's not real hard to ignore a dude with a beaner accent and a funny hat, is it?

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  165. It works this way: the Democrats that live in the heads of Conservatives are for policies that help the poor--generally by stealing money from the wealthy and just handing it to Blacks in large bundles of cash. Thus, any Democrat who has money MUST be a complete hypocrite.

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  166. Helmut Monotreme9:48 AM

    No, that would be a Satyr. And they don't need to compensate with casinos, trophy wives, and every other display of gaudy excess in which Trump revels.

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  167. MichaelNewsham9:59 AM

    When a wealthy Conservative in the House of Commons made the argument that wealthy politicians were less susceptible to bribes, the great 19th century Labour politician Keir Hardie replied "You were bribed before birth".

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  168. As a Shillman Journalism Fellow at the Freedom Center,


    If there is a more appropriately named fellowship on this great Earth, I know it not.

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  169. Halloween_Jack10:09 AM

    http://media.zenfs.com/en_us/News/ucomics.com/db150405.jpg

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  170. He Has Lucid Moments


    So Reaganesque

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  171. Curse you SMUT!

    ReplyDelete
  172. This comment is fresh off the line.

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  173. DN Nation10:38 AM

    Trump's baroque pomposity is the definition of the American Dream, but Hillary is evil for getting six-figures for speaking engagements, and Obama is uppity walking around the White House like he's the President or something. 10-4, wingnuts.


    Nice to see you back on Ben Shapiro. His Twitter has been a hoot lately. "Pansy libs don't do crossfit like I do" is the derp du jour.

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  174. DN Nation10:39 AM

    Like so?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k9M5t_7utSs

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  175. Smarter than Your Average Bear10:50 AM

    Have we reached 19 and counting in the GOP clown car yet? It's so hard to keep track

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  176. Halloween_Jack11:20 AM

    Also in cartoon mockery of La Donald: http://amultiverse.com/comic/2015/06/17/trumpresident-trump/

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  177. Gromet12:34 PM

    Huh... I have no recollection of that (how's it compares to results obtained by other states?). Mainly I remember him being okay on the environment and immigration, and he had to buck his own party there. He really went for it on four ballot measures in one election -- I don't recall the substance, only that I was against them all and it turned out so was everyone, so they went nowhere. I remember his time as one of just zero progress, (with of course debt piling up as the GOP element in the legislature refused to make progress on debt issues).

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  178. StringOnAStick1:25 PM

    I always figured it was the need for real financial disclosure that kept him from jumping in before. Prediction: he bails on the effort right after financial disclosure becomes essential.

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  179. StringOnAStick1:32 PM

    I read today that a number of the cheering audience members in attendance were hired actors. I also recall having a moment of "where the hell did they find enough people to cheer for this moron?" when I heard the announcement, and now I know: from central casting.

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  180. Robert Massing2:09 PM

    "Why? Why this Grand Canyon-size gap between media and political elites and average Americans when it comes to the subject of Donald Trump?"
    I'll be looking for this line again when Peggy Noonan predicts The Donald's election after seeing the crowd at a campaign rally.

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  181. J Neo Marvin2:19 PM

    If any Democratic candidate ran on that slogan, how long would we wait before the brethren start howling, "he/she dares to say America isn't great already!!!"?

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  182. J Neo Marvin2:20 PM

    I wouldn't put money on Todd either.

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  183. realinterrobang2:59 PM

    Now that's what I call pinkoing the bull...

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  184. realinterrobang3:03 PM

    Hey, it takes real brains to choose the right parents before birth!

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  185. realinterrobang3:16 PM

    How come the entire GOP Klown Kar Kast seems to be influenced by the oeuvre of John Wayne Gacy?

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  186. To be honest, I'm impressed by their restraint so far. I had seriously expected them to have crossed that line before 2012.

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  187. slavdude6:05 PM

    I think you're confusing Earl with his brother Seymour.

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  188. "Nobody is more closely tied to corporate money than the Clintons."Remind me again, how many hundreds of millions of dollars have the Kochs pledged to put into 2016? Or where Mrs. Cruz was drawing her salary? Or how much free campaign advertising Rupert Murdoch has provided over the years? Or ...


    (I mean, Yeshua driving the moneychangers out of the temple. Someone connected to the Heritage Foundation talking about ties to corporate money as if it were a bad thing? Yeah, 'cause Heritage has always been funded through goddamned bake sales.

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  189. I know there's a lot of animosity amongst some LGM commenters for Charles Pierce, but I enjoy the way he picks a description for a Republican politico and sticks with it E.g., Rubio always managing to rhetorically "step on a rake." *Whap*

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  190. MCSquared9:45 PM

    From Project Censored: http://www.projectcensored.org/13-schwarzenegger-met-with-enrons-key-lay-before-the-california-recall/ It was worse than I had thought. They didn't settle, apparently the lawsuits just died once Arnold took office.

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  191. And we mustn't forget the parade of Republicans kneeling before the Great and Powerful Sheldon Adelson in Las Vegas a few weeks ago. No corporate influence there, of course.

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  192. Gromet1:55 PM

    Interesting article. Hard to feel confident in some of its assertions -- it imagines Davis was a vigorous, popular governor (he was neither) and it posits Cruz Bustamente as his "natural successor," which is 100% laughable. Also some of the timing is questionable -- the energy crisis occurred in 2000; Enron's crimes became public knowledge in 2001; and Arnold didn't steal office until late November 2003. Davis had two years to make a lot of noise about Enron, and he didn't. Interesting read, though. It's certainly a possibility that Lay engineered the Arnold run... I hadn't entertained that before.

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