Friday, December 19, 2014

FRIDAY ROUND-THE-HORN.

•   The imbecility of the Sony/North Korea thing could not achieve full ripeness without a contribution from Jonah Goldberg. He talks about the 1940s, when Jack Kirby and Joe Simon, the creators of Captain America, were getting menaced by New York Nazis, and Fiorello La Guardia phoned them to pledge his support. Alas, New York's current mayor has disappointed Goldberg:
New York mayor Bill de Blasio didn’t call the management of Landmark Theaters in New York, where Sony Pictures was slated to premiere The Interview, and say, “The city of New York will see that no harm will come to you.” He didn’t say much of anything at all.
1.) I wonder if Goldberg called de Blasio's office to confirm this. 2.) I can imagine Landmark receiving such a call and saying, "Thanks a lot, Mayor! Wait'll I tell the management of Sony Pictures that you'll ring the theater with cops if they release the picture -- that ought to change their minds about cyberterrorist threats!" 3.) Doesn't Goldberg know that La Guardia smashed pinball machines, and was therefore a Liberal Fascist? Farrrrrt.

•   Oh Jesus, Goldberg just sent out his G-file email on the same subject. It's not on the internet yet, so allow me to treat you to a key passage:
The collective U.S. response to North Korea’s assault on Sony has been disgusting and dispiriting. I don’t think we should bomb North Korea over this... but the correct response is to flip Kim Jong-un the bird. What form that bird-flipping would take is open to debate.
Open to debate?
I’d like it if the TV networks all ran The Interview at the same time.
 Yeah, let's have a debate about what the nets run. Didn't this guy write a book called Liberal Fascism?
I’d like Barack Obama to call the leaders of the House and Senate to a private screening of The Interview at the White House, just like Woodrow Wilson did with Birth of a Nation.
Wilson, the biggest Liberal Fascist of them all! Goldberg is becoming a National Greatness Conservative, I guess. Wait, it gets betterworse:
Obama’s conduct in this episode has been better than others, but not very good. This is the kind of moment great politicians seize.
"What? Hollywood's making a sequel to Arthur? I'm still president, Mommy, let's nationalize Warner Brothers."
It’s the kind of moment they pray will fall into their lap. First of all, short of C.H.U.D.s, there’s really no better enemy than the North Korean regime. The Left can’t really shout racism about hating on the Norks...
I never thought I'd say this, but I thought this sort of who-would-win-in-a-fight-between-Axl-Rose-and-a-blade-of-grass gibberish was beneath Goldberg. But then, ours is an age of new lows.

•   Michael Coren at Breitbart.com:
AS OBAMA WAVERS, CANADA’S HARPER IS THE TRUE LEADER OF NORTH AMERICAN VALUES
"North American values?" This is weaker than that "Anglosphere" shit.
The Conservative leader has been in office for more than eight years now and his response to the terror attacks was entirely typical. Firm, resolute, controlled, slightly boring but utterly uncompromising.
Boring and uncompromising -- aw, but ain't that North America?
While opposition leaders and liberal newspapers were reluctant to even describe the crimes as terrorism, Harper used the word repeatedly and spoke of the need to combat this darkness internationally as well as domestically. Indeed, along with Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbot, Harper has led the world in candour concerning Islamist aspirations and the need to affirm western values.
Apparently Harper says "terror" and "Islamicism" a lot, which is why a Mountie can just roll up in ISIS territory drinking a Brador and no one can touch him. Also he's "the first leader to officially boycott Hamas," and thinks "Canada should not have to pay fines and be punished for their environmental policies," and is shutting down Canada's socialized medicine program -- kidding about that last one, guys, but though Coren doesn't approve of everything Harper does, "it’s liberals and socialist who most despise him," and after all isn't trolling what North American Values are all about?

217 comments:

  1. carolannie11:25 AM

    Pledge his support....which translates into a squad of geeks sitting around the theater, banging away on their PCs...

    ReplyDelete
  2. "Hello?...uh...hello D--uh hello Daniel? Listen..uh, uh, I can't hear too well. Do you suppose you could turn the Into The Woods trailer down just a little?...Oh-ho, that's much better...yeah...huh...yes, Fine, I can hear you now Daniel...Clear and plain and coming through fine...I'm coming through fine, too, eh? Good, then...well, them, as you say, we're both coming through fine...Good...Well, it's good that you're fine and...and I'm fine...I agree with you, it's great to be fine...ahahaha...Now then, Daniel, you know how we've always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with The Interview...THE INTERVIEW, Daniel...The Seth Rogen-James Franco vehicle...Well now, what happened is...ahm...the premier of North Korea, he had a sort of...well, he went a little funny in the head...you know...just a little...funny. And, ah...he went and did a silly thing...Well, I'll tell you what he did. He ordered his hackers to release a bunch of private correspondence between asshole movie producers, and then threatened to blow up your theaters...Ah, well, let me finish, Daniel...Let me finish, Daniel...Well listen, how do you think I feel about it? Can you imagine how I feel about it? Why do you think I'm calling you? Just to get the times for Birdman?...Of course I want to see Birdman!...Of course I want to see Birdman at your theater!...Not now, not this weekend, but soon, I hear it's going to be up for Oscars...Listen, if I didn't not want to see Birdman soon before they announce the Oscars, Landmark wouldn't have gotten this call...Listen, they won't blow up your theater. The city of New York will see that no harm comes to you...I am...I am positive Daniel...Listen, I've been all over this with the guy in the ticket booth. It's not a trick. Well, I'll tell you. We'd like to give your ushers a complete run-down on our security measures for something like this....All right, well, listen now. Who should we call? WHO should we call, Daniel? The...wha-whe, the concess...you, sorry, you faded away there...the concession booth...okay...it has a separate number...and the phones aren't working...they haven't worked so you can't transfer me. Okay....but you'll run down there right now first, will you?...uh-huh...ah-ah-eh-uhm-hm...I'm sorry too, Daniel. I'm very sorry, it looked really funny, I think Franco is a really underrated actor....All right, you're sorrier than I am, but I am sorry as well...I am sorry as you are, Daniel! Don't say that you're more sorry than I am, because I'm capable of being just as sorry as you are...So we're both sorry, all right? Rogen and Franco, very funny. All right."

    ReplyDelete
  3. Where’s Captain America when you need him?

    Haven’t you heard, Jonah? Captain America fucked Global Free
    Market
    and their son, Major Multinational, now proudly
    wears the family cape and he’s out there busy protecting monetary interests
    around the globe!

    I thought you and your colleagues knew all this, Jonah. After all, don't you all constantly pant after the daughter of this union, Unfettered Marketplace? You horndogs, you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. mortimer200011:33 AM

    I should be miffed that my favorite movie of all time was co-opted for so stupid an issue, but it was just too well done. Bravo.

    ReplyDelete
  5. dstatton11:34 AM

    A decision at the corporate level has nothing to do with the mayor of New York. Pro-business conservatives don't seem to know much about how the modern corporation works.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I read that Jonah piece and it's generally stupid but not in any interesting way. Seems even Jonah's interns are now phoning it in. He. Didn't. Even. Try to tie Gruber into this mess. The Captain America reference is a nice change of pace from the obligatory Star Trek (Wars) reference, I'll give him that, but he didn't even try to tie Gruber into this mess. The dude is slipping. I'll give it 1 1/2 out of 4 Troll Farts

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  7. Jonah wants mayors to strong arm corporations into going against their business interests for political reasons. Fucking commie!

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  8. Does he even bother with a cite for the Kirby/Simon -

    oh, wait, Jonah Goldberg, so of course not.

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  9. mortimer200011:47 AM

    It's kind of awesome that, despite pretty much all of the large and small theater chains cancelling showing The Interview, followed by Sony pulling the release, Goldberg still managed to blame de Blasio and Obama for something, and he even managed to get Benghazi into it.

    I'm guessing this amount of Goldberg gas required at least some kind of Grand Blam Burrito from Taco Hell.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Somebody order more Intertubes, we have another winner!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'd like to ride an atomic bomb while waving this comment in the air as it drops over North Korea.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Ellis_Weiner11:56 AM

    I wouldn't mind being buried in one of our deeper mine shahfts with this comment for around a hundred years.

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  13. I love the "soft pajama boy foreign policy" comment over there, as if we should risk invading North Korea and destabilizing the Korean Peninsula over a goddamn movie.

    Because that's what Jonah's readers would want, I assume.

    BTW - Jonah in 1940: "I see Mayor LaGuardia has surrounded the building housing Timely Comics with his thugs, to keep it 'safe' from the German-American Bund which SUPPOSEDLY called in death threats to the comic artists of Captain America. Typical Liberal, using a threat from overseas to justify brown-shirt tactics here in America!"

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  14. Game over, no one's topping this. See you on the other side of the weekend, folks.

    ReplyDelete
  15. cahuenga12:04 PM

    First rule of Spite Club: "It is always governments fault"


    Second rule of Spite Club:....

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  16. Brother Yam12:06 PM

    More like the Grand Derpification Theory...

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  17. My sources tell me that Kim Jong Un just added your round-eyed, running dog liberal commenting ass to his list of undesirables who will be getting a stern hack from his intertoob elves. Don't say you weren't warned...

    ReplyDelete
  18. Brother Yam12:10 PM

    I replied to the wrong comment. Bite me, Disqus for not letting me delete this.

    ReplyDelete
  19. "This at least is progress for an administration whose first response to a terrorist attack in Benghazi, Libya, was to blame an American-made video and, with much fanfare, throw its creator in jail."

    Jeezus, Jonah, don't you read the paper that runs your own column? From the LA Times:

    "Government officials maintained that Nakoula was back in custody not because of the impact of the movie [The Innocence of Muslims], which portrays the prophet Muhammad as a womanizer and a child molester, but because he had used aliases in producing the film and lied to probation office. Nakoula,who was on a type of probation known in the federal system as supervised release, served time in prison for a 2010 conviction for taking out bank and credit cards under myriad fake identities. He now faces eight charges of probation violation. The allegations include making false statements to authorities about the film — claiming his role was limited to writing the script — and denying he used the alias "Sam Bacile."

    And I guess it's just been so hard for you to accept the findings of the seven investigations and 13 hearings on Benghazi, including the impact of the video, that you've just blocked them out completely. I'm betting that the job of at least one of his interns is reminding him to breathe regularly.

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  20. I'm betting that the job of at least one of his interns is reminding him to breathe regularly.

    Secret footage from Jonah Goldberg's office:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNe05a5APDo

    ReplyDelete
  21. DocAmazing12:34 PM

    Simon and Kirby were working in New York. Most of Sony's US studios are in and around the Los Angeles area. New York Nazis (presumably less despicable than Illinois Nazis) threatened an action in New York; Sony's pulling the film nationwide.

    Jonah has nominated DeBlasio as America's Mayor.

    ReplyDelete
  22. I wonder if anyone has pointed out to Pantload that, considering the SKREEEEEING they do about Islamofascism, that there were Nazis in New York in 1940 to begin with. Evidently democracy worked well enough back then that we could tolerate that.

    ReplyDelete
  23. mgmonklewis12:41 PM

    "...still, it had a good ,em>derp and was easy to fart to. I give it 80/100."

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  24. mgmonklewis12:43 PM

    On their PCs, you say?

    ReplyDelete
  25. BigHank5312:45 PM

    Rudy 9-11 Guliani would have...uh...well, he would have done something that the right wing would like. Probably have the NYPD start strip searching African-Americans in public and then arresting them for indecent exposure.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Did somebody say GOP Rep. Blake Farenthold?

    http://i.kinja-img.com/gawker-media/image/upload/s--J7W8PEZJ--/c_fit,fl_progressive,q_80,w_320/18k2qxdqj1afzjpg.jpg
    ~

    ReplyDelete
  27. mgmonklewis12:46 PM

    This comment has been chosen for its sexual prowess.

    ReplyDelete
  28. SWEET SCREAMING JESUS WHAT IS IT

    ReplyDelete
  29. Been drinking its pure rain water, has it?

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  30. So if Mayor Bloomberg had FORCED people to drink 7-11 Double Gulps at gunpoint, the right would have celebrated him, Q.E.D.

    ReplyDelete
  31. "Damn, Alfred E. Newman's really gone to seed, hasn't he?"

    All credit to Gummo.
    ~

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  32. I like Korean sax.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfUVoFZrZ5A

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  33. DN Nation12:50 PM

    Hey, wingnuts, I did some super-sleuthing for you:

    http://i.imgur.com/yHPoaty.png



    You're welcome.

    ReplyDelete
  34. DN Nation12:52 PM

    "Jeezus, doesn't Jonah read..."


    No.

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  35. He makes Benny Hill look like Leonardo DiCaprio.

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  36. He's afraid that if he tells the truth, even accidentally, he might lose his NRO privileges.

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  37. Yes because Free Dumb.

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  38. Jay B.1:05 PM

    I’d like Barack Obama to call the leaders of the House and Senate to a private screening of The Interview at the White House, just like Woodrow Wilson did withBirth of a Nation.


    "Uh...It's like history written with a limp dick and a gag reel?" — Obama on The Interview

    ReplyDelete
  39. susanoftexas1:11 PM

    When I saw his last name I knew he had to be related to the great politician (if not mother) Sissy Farenthold; he's her step-grandson.
    Politics and family life don't mix very well, especially if the family has drug and alcohol problems.

    ReplyDelete
  40. foxtrotsky1:19 PM

    Yes, Jonah, Wilson's screening of Birth of a Nation is exemplary.
    Holy purple buttfucking Jesus.

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  41. Colleen1:36 PM

    Brilliant

    ReplyDelete
  42. ohsopolite1:37 PM

    Jonah's writings may not stack up well, but at least they always sit in a large puddle of Mrs. Betterworse Syrup-like Product.

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  43. PersonaAuGratin1:40 PM

    Wish I could remember whom to credit, but awhile back, someone (probably here) described him as "Alfred E. Newman on a 5,000 calories-a-day-diet." Which comes to mind every time I see any picture of the guy.

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  44. M. Krebs1:41 PM

    Don't you all remember the 1972 Treaty of Tokyo between the USA, Sony, Exxon, BP, and IBM? The one that put us on the hook to defend multinational corporate interests against all threats from bad people? It was in all the papers.

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  45. Unfettered Marketplace is not that into Jonah. She thinks National Review looks stupid without any ads.

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  46. M. Krebs1:44 PM

    "I'm going back in as soon as my seat is dry." -- random audience member

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  47. Here's a nice version, if you want one http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/2007/03/08/comic-book-urban-legends-revealed-93/ Not clear how Jonah could read it without noticing that the liberals and the fascists are not on the same side. But he does have that talent.

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  48. There's a big Simon & Kirby book out recently; how much you wanna bet Jonah got it from the book or from publicity for it?

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  49. satch1:54 PM

    Aww, isn't that adorable? Little Blakie brought his "babysitter" to a photo op.

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  50. KatWillow1:56 PM

    A LOOONG time ago my brother convinced me SONY stood for Standard Oil of New York. Maybe he's been chatting with Loadpants, too. It took a few hours to figure out my leg had been pulled good and hard, but Jonah never would grasp that.

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  51. "It pulled MY string!"

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  52. I've heard that one too, but from someone at work who really believed it. Must be an urban myth

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  53. The crowning irony is that Jonah G. would have shit all over the Abraham Lincoln Battalion for having snuck over to Spain to fight the Fascists five years too early.

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  54. montag22:27 PM

    After the blow-me.org brouhaha, ol' Sissy should have been doing facepalms all day, but with the latest sexual harassment suit, she should have learned her lesson. You don't endorse Republicans, period, even if you're related to them.

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  55. alboy22:29 PM

    Thanks for doing the Lord's work and actually reading what this hack publishes. Is there a more useless appendage in American discourse these days? He really loves to remind us just how stupid, uninformed and idiotic he is. His mother must be soooo proud of her little hellspawn...because I'm pretty sure no one else loves this little paramecium. Keep shining the light on his shitshow, Roy; the world needs you.

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  56. montag22:32 PM

    Well, toleration isn't quite the word. We put them in internment camps, just like the Japanese. (Little-known fact, but true. Most of the camps were in the South and in Texas. I suspect we can explain Texas politics today by escapees blending in with the locals.)

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  57. alboy22:32 PM

    SOCONY? Yes. SONY? Not so much....

    ReplyDelete
  58. susanoftexas2:40 PM

    This is the kind of moment great politicians seize. It’s the kind of moment they pray will fall into their lap. First of all, short of C.H.U.D.s, there’s really no better enemy than the North Korean regime. The Left can’t really shout racism about hating on the Norks...
    So.... Jonah is saying that great politicians hope and pray for the chance to exploit and inflate any perceived international crises, no matter how petty. They do this because the right wants an enemy they can hate on, starting with giving them dehumanizing nicknames. The right does not like to be called racist by the left, however, so it is fortunate the North Koreans are not a different race, perhaps an Asian race like those scary California farmers we tossed into concentration camps during WWII. There is no way the left can object to whipping up a public hysteria of hatred if it's those people.
    I would say God help us but imaginary God knows we're assholes who torture our brothers and sisters so we're on our own.

    ReplyDelete
  59. susanoftexas2:43 PM

    Or you take away their duckie pajamas and assign them a keeper.

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  60. carolannie2:46 PM

    well, I meant computing devices. But the image has a certain appeal, a wall of geeks hunched over their monitors and towers

    ReplyDelete
  61. Brian Schlosser2:50 PM

    Bra. Vo.

    ReplyDelete
  62. ColBatGuano3:04 PM

    I approve of this comment.

    ReplyDelete
  63. "First of all, short of C.H.U.D.s, there’s really no better enemy than
    the North Korean regime. The Left can’t really shout racism about hating
    on the Norks..."

    In retrospect, I'd like to deduct a half aTroll Fart.

    ReplyDelete
  64. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IDE9MC3jnl0

    ReplyDelete
  65. smut clyde3:35 PM

    "Great politicians" = "shameless opportunists". GWB = role-model.

    ReplyDelete
  66. Indeed, along with Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbot, Harper has led
    the world in candour concerning Islamist aspirations and the need to
    affirm western values.


    So going batshit, instituting a massive new government organization, mass surveillance, and invasion of innocent countries wasn't the proper way to deal with 9/11, because neither of those two have done that?

    ReplyDelete
  67. bekabot3:42 PM

    "What form that bird-flipping would take is open to debate."

    Flip the same kind of bird Dr. Strangelove flipped when he told the Führer he could walk. That ought to go over swell.

    ReplyDelete
  68. BTW - pourquoi "Norks"?

    The hell?

    ReplyDelete
  69. There's a movie I need to see again.

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  70. M. Krebs3:53 PM

    You mean it's not a Bob Newhart bit?

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  71. 49 yrs. later & this is just as true, except maybe everything is even worse.

    ReplyDelete
  72. billcinsd4:52 PM

    Second rule of Spite Club: It's about the lying; no wait It's about ethics in game journalism; no wait, It's about the Four Dead in Benghazi; no wait, It's about unconstitutional executive branch over reach; no wait -- Thanks, Obama

    ReplyDelete
  73. ckc_not_kc4:57 PM

    ...please don't judge us by our asshole prime minister

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  74. Premature Anti-Fascism

    http://delong.typepad.com/sdj/2009/04/if-stone-premature-anti-fascist-watch-mirror-of-wildernesses-department.html

    ReplyDelete
  75. ken_lov5:10 PM

    'This is the kind of moment great politicians seize.'

    Yep. Cos America has bent over backwards to be kind to North Korea, but it's time for that to stop. Be firm, Mr President! Time to get that old Axis of Evil out of the closet!! Look how well it worked last time!!!

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  76. Oh, god.

    My real bitch about this whole nonsense is that North Korea sets it's sights too low. If you really wanted to fuck with 'Mericans you would hack Fox News.

    Cowards.

    Of course, there might be some who would consider that an actual act of war.

    ReplyDelete
  77. billcinsd5:24 PM

    really who wouldn't love

    Obama sings Tractors: Turnips! Buttocks!

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  78. The collective U.S. response to North Korea’s assault on Sony has been disgusting and dispiriting.


    Yes, it is completely unlike the U.S.'s response to North Korea's announcement that it was going to restart its nuclear arms program and no one could do a thing about it, nyah, nyah.



    Who can forget how Bush II frightened North Korea into going ahead with its program and eventually testing nukes, by sending more troops to Iraq? That's real leadership for you.

    ReplyDelete
  79. Maybe he doesn't ahve anything else to wear.

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  80. "Watermelon Man" was an awesome movie

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cC_rYYnD05s

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  81. http://thumb9.shutterstock.com/display_pic_with_logo/137002/187745726/stock-photo-fat-man-in-diaper-isolated-on-white-187745726.jpg

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  82. randomworker7:05 PM

    Do they know Mexico is in North America?

    ReplyDelete
  83. Or:

    http://consequenceofsound.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/devo-vid.jpg?w=260

    ReplyDelete
  84. I sense this comment's power and would gladly seek its life essence.

    ReplyDelete
  85. montag27:39 PM

    Oh, that's just Jonah when he thinks he's being cute and clever. Which is, unfortunately, virtually all of the time. You see, Jonah thinks he's witty in the same way that Michele Bachmann thinks she's destroyed liberals with facts.

    ReplyDelete
  86. DocAmazing8:58 PM

    to make ends meet...

    I see what you etc.

    ReplyDelete
  87. montag29:15 PM

    And these days, mention Godfrey Cambridge and most of the time you'll get a blank look, even though he and Severn Darden were pretty much James Coburn's sidekicks in Hollywood. Another great one with Godfrey Cambridge:

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  88. montag29:32 PM

    Oh, yes, that was where Hitachi was so upset at not being included (especially after all it had done for American women) that its employees unfurled a banner reading, "WYankees Go Home!"

    ReplyDelete
  89. montag29:36 PM

    "... because neither of those two have done that?"

    Not for lack of trying, though.

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  90. John Wesley Hardin9:37 PM

    "Boring and uncompromising" is their preferred stance on everything.

    ReplyDelete
  91. montag29:39 PM

    If one is a winger, it helps to have a really, really, really short memory.

    Probably in the nanosecond range.

    ReplyDelete
  92. montag29:41 PM

    C'mon, you know the rule about fraternizing with the gardening help.

    ReplyDelete
  93. John Wesley Hardin9:42 PM

    "International entertainment conglomerates are people, my friend, and this is an outrage. If we let this sort of thing go unavenged, lawless states will be ever more encouraged to hack our utilities and our industrial capability, and the right to that sort of behavior is one we reserve to ourselves alone."

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  94. John Wesley Hardin9:47 PM

    It's the second time I've seen that word today. Jonah knows he probably can't get away with calling them "gooks" but We can still righteously hate on the North Koreans, so "Nork" (from Norf Koreen, obvs) it is. It sounds quasi-military and macho, too, so it's irresistible to a momma's boy like Jonah.

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  95. ken_lov9:54 PM

    I just got bored and took the time to skim read Goldberg's stream of consciousness, which he presumably phoned in while eating a meal and watching football. I especially loved this bit:

    'A long-planned symphony concert [in Israel] went ahead as scheduled. The only accommodation they made to the assault: Everyone in the audience wore gas masks.'



    So there you have the solution. Obama can provide Kevlar armor and gas masks for all the people buying tickets to the movie, and the show can go on. USA! USA!

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  96. susanoftexas9:55 PM

    He's like Baby Huey.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baby_Huey#mediaviewer/File:Babyhuey.JPG

    ReplyDelete
  97. montag29:55 PM

    "AS OBAMA WAVERS, CANADA’S HARPER IS THE TRUE LEADER OF NORTH AMERICAN VALUES"


    Fuck, and here I thought we didn't have any. Thanks, Brightfart.com!

    ReplyDelete
  98. John Wesley Hardin9:55 PM

    "This is the kind of moment great politicians seize that authoritarian demagogues seize upon because we have been humiliated and denied DENIED! the chance to see a movie that would have been generally ignored otherwise."
    FIXT.

    ReplyDelete
  99. John Wesley Hardin10:02 PM

    "Hellooo, Mexico is still south of us right? Duh."


    No, they do not.

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  100. montag210:14 PM

    Well, sure they are. They're part of the [drumroll] Axis of Evil!

    And who are we to question George W. Bush's speechwriters on such a grave topic?

    ReplyDelete
  101. montag210:20 PM

    Hey, you're gonna have to get used to it. We got judged because of George W. Bush and Deadeye Dick.

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  102. Amandie DiFranco10:26 PM

    If you can reconcile BarackObama's stance on The Interview with his stance on Innocence of Muslims, you're at least as dishonest as he is.

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  103. ckc_not_kc10:32 PM

    ...touché! - we'll see what we can do about that.

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  104. Tehanu10:45 PM

    Even GoddessAir wouldn't sell Jonah a ticket. And you can believe me, because I never lie and I'm always right.

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  105. To Yankee ears, the accents were indistinguishable, so that the only way to tell them apart back then was that one preferred schnitzel and the other preferred brisket.

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  106. TGuerrant12:07 AM

    He won't even smoke Hamas cigars anymore. The man's a true hero.

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  107. TGuerrant12:13 AM

    He had a great standup routine about playing Vegas - laying out by the pool wherever he was performing and, to freak out the whites, slathering on tanning lotion.

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  108. redoubtagain12:19 AM

    (Jonah, one major difference is that unlike you, and Woodrow Wilson, President Obama is not a raging bigot.)

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  109. redoubtagain12:49 AM

    Porky Dork Forks "Norks"

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  110. TGuerrant1:07 AM

    Harper hasn't yet ramped up to attacking other countries or torturing people, of course, so don't anybody tell him we've got WMDs.

    ReplyDelete
  111. TGuerrant1:10 AM

    Because the issues are exactly the same since there's a movie involved. Got it.

    ReplyDelete
  112. synykyl2:19 AM

    I don’t think we should bomb North Korea over this... but the correct
    response is to flip Kim Jong-un the bird. What form that bird-flipping
    would take is open to debate.


    Sony spent millions of dollars to make and promote a film mocking Kim Jong-un. They already flipped him the bird. If North Korea actually had anything to do with the hacking, I'd say Kim was just flipping it back.

    ReplyDelete
  113. smut clyde6:38 AM

    "it’s liberals and socialist who most despise him,"
    So conservatives despise Harper but not as much. OK.

    ReplyDelete
  114. willf6:46 AM

    Louie: "I've often wondered why you don't return to America. Did you abscond with the church funds? Did you run off with a senator's wife? I like to think that you killed a man. It's the romantic in me."

    Rick "It's a combination of all three".

    (Fun fact: Bogart also played a premature antifascist in Passage To Marseille, once again starring alongside Claude Rains.)

    ReplyDelete
  115. willf6:54 AM

    "Well, I'd be the president's little dumpling", said Phyllis Schafly.


    Man, I miss Bloom County

    ReplyDelete
  116. willf6:57 AM

    http://www.thecomicstrips.com/store/add.php?iid=80411



    Hope this works.

    ReplyDelete
  117. mgmonklewis10:02 AM

    I was just going for a cheap double-entendre. Mission accomplished?

    ReplyDelete
  118. mgmonklewis10:03 AM

    They do know that Messico is part of North America, right?

    ReplyDelete
  119. mgmonklewis10:05 AM

    It's because of the Transitive Power of Cinema. I think I learned that in TheaterCalc class or something.

    ReplyDelete
  120. cleter11:12 AM

    I wonder if the Breitbart people know that Mexico is part of North America.

    ReplyDelete
  121. cleter11:21 AM

    Honestly, any regime is going to look bad if you only judge it by the pimps and the C.H.U.D.S.

    ReplyDelete
  122. cleter11:22 AM

    And you didn't have to take off your goddamned shoes to fly on the Pan Am Clipper.

    ReplyDelete
  123. regressive white trash reli12:31 PM

    ^^^^^^ brand new^^^TROLL^^ profile^^^^^,,,,,,,,,,,,
    gotta love TROLL profiles; fun to showcase and abuse

    ReplyDelete
  124. Dirty Dancing II: Havana Nights

    You... monster.

    ReplyDelete
  125. Write a note to the sentence's mother, as well.

    ReplyDelete
  126. Somebody check and see if the Pentagon has any spares.

    ReplyDelete
  127. They do love their stupid invented insults, don't they; right up there with "Obummer" and "libtards". Sheesh.

    ReplyDelete
  128. So we shouldn't get irate over violations of human rights, but we should over not being able to see shitty movies.

    Priorities! Whee.

    ReplyDelete
  129. Too bad we don't have a Bill The Congaroo to take care of Jonah.

    "The Pantload is the problem... and the tornado is the answer! End of scene, scene, scene!"

    ReplyDelete
  130. cleter1:20 PM

    Hey, I didn't MAKE the damned thing.

    ReplyDelete
  131. susanoftexas1:25 PM

    Juanita Jean is a must-read on this. http://www.juanitajean.com/2012/04/24/ducky-pajamas-and-whining/

    ReplyDelete
  132. satch1:39 PM

    "The white pool was just the same as the black pool, except the black pool didn't have any water in it."

    ReplyDelete
  133. Amandie DiFranco2:41 PM

    Sony CEO says Obama lied about not being contacted before folding to North Korea

    http://t.co/CcFgUUFErA

    ReplyDelete
  134. Another Kiwi3:08 PM

    Just so's I get the full stupid bonus, this is Griffiths "B. O. A..N." isn't it? With the Klan as heroes? OK this is ouchy, burny stupid.

    ReplyDelete
  135. Another Kiwi3:10 PM

    I thank you'll find that Mr. Goldbrick does not associate with Transistive cinemas of uncertain gender.

    ReplyDelete
  136. Another Kiwi3:13 PM

    "Thank you for your call, the pentagon cannot answer at the moment because we are on the "Police Department of the Future" sales tour. Leave your name and number and $700 and we'll call as soon as we can. Have a weapons grade day"

    ReplyDelete
  137. Another Kiwi3:16 PM

    IKR. He's letting his 14 year schoolboy readership know he's still there for them.

    ReplyDelete
  138. RogerAiles3:16 PM

    The same accommodation made by Goldberg's classmates at Goucher College.

    ReplyDelete
  139. Since "Woodrow Wilson", I'm assuming it is Griffith's film.

    ReplyDelete
  140. Another Kiwi3:21 PM

    Abbott's incoherent rambling is matched only by his zeal to crackdown on the terrorisms. This, together with his creative accountancy economics means that he has a popularity only slightly better than tooth decay. Good to see that American Conservatives rate him because he will not get a job in the southern hemisphere when he is voted out.

    ReplyDelete
  141. Another Kiwi3:26 PM

    *gulp* Has anyone seen Joberg fart and chew gum? Because, you know, vegetative state.
    The other question is how did this film get made in Hollywood's liberal re-education camp? I thought such things were unpossible.

    ReplyDelete
  142. he will not get a job in the southern hemisphere when he is voted out

    That bad, huh?

    ReplyDelete
  143. Meanie-meanie, tickle a person3:37 PM

    Dead of a heart attack at 43. And people wonder why some of think there's no god...

    ReplyDelete
  144. Another Kiwi3:46 PM

    He is setting records for the speed with which he is fucking off the base. Extraordinary. he is abetted (Abbotted) in this by a cast of rich clowns whose incompetence surprises even me.

    ReplyDelete
  145. Meanie-meanie, tickle a person3:55 PM

    OT: Oh, just fucking kill me now.

    Has that asshole got balls or what? Any sane person looking at the Ferguson Grand Jury sees the evidence that witnesses lied like rugs, and goes, heywaitafuckin'minutenow... Asshole prosecutor admits it and just shines us all on with a straight face. God damn that's hootspah.

    ReplyDelete
  146. glennisw4:04 PM

    Senator Vitter?

    ReplyDelete
  147. billcinsd4:22 PM

    Boring and Uncompromising is Jonah's Porn name

    ReplyDelete
  148. Better yet - he says in that same interview he's not interested in bringing perjury charges against any of the liars.

    This man needs to get disbarred and prosecuted himself NOW.

    ReplyDelete
  149. DocAmazing4:45 PM

    Gotta work on that sentence structure. It was Sony that folded; Obama doesn't release movies.

    ReplyDelete
  150. Another Kiwi5:10 PM

    That's kind of gob-smacking.

    ReplyDelete
  151. Tom Parmenter5:38 PM

    No, no, they just converted schnitzel into country-fried steak.

    ReplyDelete
  152. Tom Parmenter5:40 PM

    One of Wilson's few lasting remarks, "It's like history written in lightning."

    ReplyDelete
  153. He fails every time he tries to apply reading comprehension, so pointing out sentence structure fail is kind of like gnats and camels, if you know what I mean.

    ReplyDelete
  154. AHA! Obama done normalized relations with the Cubans, so we'll have an embassy there, because he knows there's a movie in production that insults the Cubans, and then he can get more American embassy personnel killed, blah blah argle gerflunk.

    ReplyDelete
  155. Reverend Al Sharpton7:49 PM

    Hey, anybody here want to congratulate me for what happened today in Brooklyn? Two for one, y'all.

    Can I get an Amen?

    ReplyDelete
  156. Socialist Cubone7:57 PM

    You couldn't even wait for the bodies to get fucking cold.

    ReplyDelete
  157. And that's why I have no fucking patience with wingnuts anymore.

    ReplyDelete
  158. M. Krebs8:14 PM

    He meant "hummus." Harper's boycotting hummus, because he thinks it's what's causing his flatulence.

    ReplyDelete
  159. Reverend Al8:22 PM

    Let's celebrate the season now.

    High-five, yo!

    ReplyDelete
  160. smut clyde8:32 PM

    It is like we are living on one of Dix's or Grosz's depictions of post-war depravity.
    https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/06/d1/ec/06d1ec66f7626c79b8b1d76217e2793e.jpg

    ReplyDelete
  161. montag28:42 PM

    As I intimated elsewhere here, one doesn't consider the opinions of the servants, which is what the right wing thinks of Mexico. Besides, Harper is very obviously a white dude in the Anglo-American tradition, and they're the only ones that really count, right?

    ReplyDelete
  162. PersonaAuGratin9:19 PM

    Not sending them a Christmas card this year.

    ReplyDelete
  163. stepped_pyramids10:08 PM

    I think it's of a piece with 'ChiCom'.

    ReplyDelete
  164. M. Krebs10:27 PM

    Wow. The nuclear option.

    ReplyDelete
  165. Which is pretty dumb as well.

    ReplyDelete
  166. Was it Nazis (that is, self-identified members of a political party/movement) that were interned or German-Americans and German immigrants (people who happened to be from a country with which were at war, like the Japanese)?


    As I understand it, nobody bothered to ask any of the Japanese interned if they had any connection to or sympathy with the Imperial government or military. I doubt it was the case with Germans.

    ReplyDelete
  167. AGoodQuestion11:18 PM

    Well he's not just any Republican. He's a Republican who takes great pains to trumpet his idiocy to the world.


    Admittedly, this is less of a distinction than it used to be.

    ReplyDelete
  168. Reverend Al Sharpton11:20 PM

    Mission Accomplished, today, y'all.

    A two-fer.

    ReplyDelete
  169. AGoodQuestion11:24 PM

    It's kind of awesome that, despite pretty much all of the large and small theater chains cancelling showing The Interview, followed by Sony pulling the release, Goldberg still managed to blame de Blasio and Obama for something, and he even managed to get Benghazi into it.
    Especially when Obama is staking out the pro-free speech position on this kerfuffle. Of course Jonah is blind to context, and also to text.

    ReplyDelete
  170. montag211:37 PM

    It was a bit different with the Germans and some Italians, because, with the rise of Hitler and Mussolini, the FBI had been watching some of them, suspecting seditious activity, because groups like the German-American Bund were decidedly Nazi in character. But, probably half of those interned were non-naturalized German nationals in coastal areas, and no small number were German nationals who were deported from Latin America (to the United States, at the request of the FBI). And, some groups were advocating refusing conscription, which came under the Alien and Sedition Act, so their members were swept up, as well. I would guess about 10-15% of those of German and Italian descent that were interned were natural-born or naturalized citizens,

    ReplyDelete
  171. montag211:47 PM

    Much less a distinction, judging by the current composition of the party.

    ReplyDelete
  172. billcinsd12:04 AM

    or maybe Botero

    https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=http%3A%2F%2Fdistritoglobal.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F04%2FFernando-Botero-41.jpg&f=1

    ReplyDelete
  173. huh huh huh, he said "Dix".

    ReplyDelete
  174. smut clyde2:34 AM

    Has anyone seen Joberg fart and chew gum?

    Imagine it's bubble gum. You know you want to.

    ReplyDelete
  175. Frank DiCuffolk5:45 AM

    Well, the crowd has been chanting

    "What do we want? Dead Cops!" "When do we want it? Now!"

    So it's not like they didn't warn us.

    ReplyDelete
  176. Frank DiCuffolk5:47 AM

    @JammieWF: Sharpton to have say over how Sony makes movies, how NYPD officers murdered http://t.co/qh1PYjsFkO

    @TheRevAl

    ReplyDelete
  177. Frank DiCuffolk5:55 AM

    The Left throws gasoline around, but is surprised when someone who wants to burn the bitch down actually lights a match.


    #whotheyare

    #whattheydo

    ReplyDelete
  178. synykyl8:58 AM

    Why did McCulloch bother to call any witnesses at all? He may as well have told the grand jury to go Google the case.

    ReplyDelete
  179. Frank DiCuffolk10:12 AM

    There's a lot of us liberals out there whose thoughts are visibly skittering away from the Awfulness Of The Thing That We Did.

    Hopeful, kinda.

    ReplyDelete
  180. mgmonklewis10:37 AM

    Apologies for posting the same comment downthread after you had posted it here.

    ReplyDelete
  181. mgmonklewis10:41 AM

    Yeah, I missed that comment above before I posted mine. Sorry! I wasn't trying to steal anybody else's stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  182. StringOnAStick11:29 AM

    My FIL's German immigrant parents went back to Germany in the early 1930's after being recruited for an engineering job (tractor design). There weren't many here, and there were representatives of the German government recruiting in the US for skills in short supply to rebuild the fatherland. My FIL recalls being relentlessly bullied in school for being a Yank, and Hitler aggrandizement everywhere. His parents finally got a clue that the schnitzel was about to hit the fan, so they returned to the US "on the last boat out" as he likes to say; they lost everything and returned to the US even poorer than they'd left.
    Their welcome back to the US included being constantly harassed by the FBI throughout the war years as potential spies, plus jobs being hard to come by for someone with a German accent. You'd have thought that a skilled engineer would have been useful in the Michigan car/tractor industry during the war, and eventually it was but there were some close to starving times before the need for skilled workers overcame anti-immigrant sentiment.

    ReplyDelete
  183. StringOnAStick11:31 AM

    Oh hey, I knew there was something else I wanted for Christmas this year!

    ReplyDelete
  184. StringOnAStick11:42 AM

    Just to reiterate:

    "This man needs to get disbarred and prosecuted himself NOW."
    Fucking hell.

    ReplyDelete
  185. randomworker12:15 PM

    No worries! It's a good question!

    ReplyDelete
  186. Matt Jones1:47 PM

    "Because that's what Jonah's readers would want, I assume."


    I'd donate to a Kickstarter to parachute them all into NK, Wolverines-style. Bonus points if the parachutes are packed by the lowest bidder without any safety regulations. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  187. Mike Dixon2:39 PM

    Oh man oh man oh man
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bOhGs1ReVGA&app=desktop

    ReplyDelete
  188. Duncan4:57 PM

    One of whom was the Canadian David Frum. Didn't Frum actually coin the phrase "Axis of Evil"?
    http://youtu.be/bOR38552MJA

    ReplyDelete
  189. Frank DiCuffolk5:00 PM

    Will Dems who blamed Palin for Giffords attack refuse a ‘conversation’ about NYC shootings?

    http://t.co/UFiZMgwbQr

    ReplyDelete
  190. Frank DiCuffolk5:49 PM

    @DormanHill:

    Consider that if one of NYPD's dead officers had seen the shooter and shot him first NYNY and Ferguson would be rioting and looting now.

    #sotrue

    ReplyDelete
  191. Except for the inconvenient gun that most who agree with your statement offhand worship as a penis-of-theirs-they-can-still-see substitute, you almost had a point.

    ReplyDelete
  192. Yeah, I've noticed libbies putting up ads that conflate crosshairs with officeholders public servants (UNION members!).

    ReplyDelete
  193. Cuffook Regressed9:33 PM

    Howdy assholes. Go Fook yourselves.

    ReplyDelete
  194. freq flag10:47 PM

    Yes because Free Dumb.
    That, and/or "rectal feeding," now. Apparently.

    ReplyDelete
  195. freq flag10:51 PM

    strip searching African-Americans in public and then arresting them for indecent exposure. Wouldn't do shit for security but when did the right ever give a damn about that?

    cf. "OK, you've covered your ass now..."

    ReplyDelete
  196. freq flag10:55 PM

    "First of all, short of C.H.U.D.s, there’s really no better enemy than
    the North Korean regime. The Left can’t really shout racism about hating on the Norks..."


    Oh no...he didn't. Did he?

    ReplyDelete