THE STUPIDEST THING EVER WRITTEN UNTIL GOLDBERG WRITES SOMETHING ELSE, PART INFINITY.

I actually subscribe to "The Goldberg File," through which Jonah Goldberg sends special email columns to the late-night real people, and this is how today's transmission begins:

By the time this "news'' letter reaches your e-mail box, pretty much every joke imaginable about "Pajama Boy" will have been made. But I reject such a dour Malthusian view of Pajama Boy humor! 

When the brouhaha started, I was tempted to make the following joke on Twitter: 

Q: What's the hardest part of being picked as the poster boy for the pajama-boy ad campaign?
A: Telling your parents you're gay.

Blink. Blink.

Now, quick, before you call A&E and have my reality show canceled, the first problem with this joke is that you're not supposed to make any derogatory jokes about being gay anymore. And that's okay by me so long as people avoid being complete tools about enforcing that rule.

Even though he was almost certainly all by himself when he was writing this, Goldberg reacts as if he's feeling the Springtime for Hitler stares that naturally come with this kind of  "but seriously, gay people, amirite, hey don't be a tool, brah, I'm just joking" monologue -- Behold his recovery:

But there's a deeper problem with the joke. It's insulting to gays. And I don't mean that merely in the sense that it's wrong to make gays the butts of jokes anymore (You know what I mean!). I mean that there are plenty of gay dudes -- and women! -- who are vastly more masculine than Pajama Boy. Pajama Boy doesn't exude homosexuality; he gives off the anodyne scent of emasculation. Seriously, the construction worker from the Village People would kick his ass. Besides, this is the gay enrollment ad for Obamacare (there's also this). All of these dudes are manlier than Pajama Boy.

Goldberg's second link leads to a National Review post on the Obamacare LGBT outreach, to which NR's readers respond with humorous comments such as,  "SEND THEM TO THE WINTER OLYMPICS IN RUSSIA WITH THE OTHER 2 LESBOS THAT OBUMA CHOSE," "Gyno exams up their A---s.... or how to ask the doctor to remove Duct Tape from their nuts after taping them up for that smooth bikini look," "And how do you pap smear a f--g--ot... damn... that's nothing but a fancy stool sample...Ewww yuk and a half," and other such gay-friendly jokes you shouldn't be such a tool as to get offended by.

If you try to play out the life of Pajama Boy in your mind, he probably has a girlfriend. It's just that she's wearing the pants in the relationship, as they used to say. I picture her like Sarah Silverman in School of Rock or the girlfriend at the beginning of Office Space who everyone knows is cheating on Peter.

Good to see Goldberg's still working his research chops.

Pajama Boy is a Low-T liberal who wears a "this is what a feminist looks like" T-shirt and flinches whenever his girlfriend makes a sudden movement...

The whole thing goes on like that, not excluding the now-traditional, we-found-out-who-this-Obamaqueer-really-is-and-boy-is-he-a-Obamaqueer routine ("For all I know he bow-hunts alligators and rides a Harley. Though, come on, it's doubtful"). The passage even ends with the kind of customary comeback employed by douchebros who have expended all their intellectual resources on denigrating someone's masculinity and still haven't gotten the universal high-fives they were expecting:

Last, I love the rearguard effort from liberals trying to turn the mockery of Pajama Boy into proof of right-wing sexual insecurity. It seems to me this is a pretty desperate attempt by the MSNBC fanboy set to compensate for the fact that so many people find Pajama Boy pathetic.

I'm not the freak, you're the freak! FARRRRRRT. There -- would a faggot do such manly farts? Only I didn't mean faggot, you know what I mean, don't be a tool...

The whole thing is so vile I'm tempted to republish it so you can see I'm not kidding, but I'm sure one of his fans will have done so in admiration before the day is over.