Tuesday, September 03, 2013

TIME FOR RAND PAUL TO MAKE A SPEECH ON FIRE ISLAND.

Shorter libertarians: Next thing you know, Big Gummint will make us sell wedding cakes to black people!

More libertarian gay rights fun here.

UPDATE. "The homofascist rainbow-shirts are at it again," says Matt Barber about the case at Catholic Online. "They've unsheathed, once more, their anti-Christian long knives." He must be one of those religious libertarians. Barber also finds a black preacher who rejects the civil rights argument: "Don't compare your sin to my skin!" Maybe Reason can make a t-shirt out of that.

129 comments:

  1. Eh...I've never been behind this issue as much as some people. I really don't see how bakeries or wedding photographers qualify as "public accommodations." It doesn't look like equality, it looks like an attempt to use the law to force "bad people" to think in ways of which we approve. They've been trying to do something like that in Canada for years, and only recently have they figured out what a bad idea it's been.


    Really, just ask yourself this - Do I support lawsuits like this because they're on the side of justice, or because they're an opportunity to laugh at "fundies" getting smacked down?

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  2. edroso1:51 PM

    Because they're on the side of justice.


    My turn: Does Sweetcakes have the right to refuse service to black people?

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  3. I could do without your condescending second paragraph, which seems to assume that people who disagree with you about this are motivated only by a desire for shits and giggles, and will realize it if only they're honest with themselves.

    More to the point, you seem confused about the legal nature of the case. 1. There's no lawsuit here; there's a state agency looking into whether the law applies to this situation, and they're looking into it because some customers complained to the agency. 2. When the Oregon law refers to "any place of public accommodation," it's not just talking about parks and restrooms; the standard meaning of "public accommodation" for the purposes of all anti-discrimination laws includes any retail establishment where you can stroll in and pay money for something. 3. The law doesn't give a shit about what people think; it requires them to treat their customers in a non-discriminatory way.

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  4. Bizarro Mike2:01 PM

    It's the same as whites-only lunch counters, to me.


    Though, for your second paragraph, yeah, it is "funny" to see the libertarian who talks of great freedom revealed (again, always) as a petty tyrant. I generally see this as the equivalent of "states rights" -- a bullshit principle used to disguise a retrograde world view.

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  5. coozledad2:01 PM

    Let's just keep it at "Time for Rand Paul to make a speech on fire".


    I can live with that.

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  6. Instead of "to me," you could just as correctly say "in the laws of the state of Oregon." What's at issue here isn't some new kind of regulation dealing only with same-sex couples; it's that sexual orientation, since 2007, has been one of the protected categories— like race, religion, etc.— in the state's general anti-discrimination statute.


    Supporters of the bakery aren't arguing that this isn't discrimination; they're just looking for an "I want to discriminate because my religion says so" loophole, which the law doesn't recognize.

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  7. montag22:21 PM

    Umm, let's try to be more specific: "Time for Rand Paul to make a speech while he's on fire."


    That, I would watch.

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  8. coozledad2:26 PM

    And he could make it at Fire Island.

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  9. merl12:38 PM

    I enjoy laughing at fundies and rightwingers.

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  10. Budbear2:44 PM

    Sweet jeezus. I read your first sentence as "whites-only lynch counter". The sad part is it also makes sense.

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  11. Budbear2:48 PM

    Well, it is the time of the year for 'Burning Man'. We could call it "Burning Jackass".

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  12. BigHank532:52 PM

    The closet dominionists have been making noises about a religious exemption since roughly forever. While nowadays they mutter darkly about the abominations of homosexuality (mentioned twice in the Bible, folks, and Leviticus doesn't count if you're a Christian--no, really, Jesus said that) rest assured they're itching for the opportunity to discriminate against unmarried mothers, the suspiciously infertile, those with ungodly haircuts, those who bear the mark of Cain, Christ-killers, and whoever else they decide to put on their shit list.


    The one thing I've never been able to figure out is this: since there are so very many members of the general public that disgust them, why did they ever start a business that involved the public at all?

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  13. Also, if I wanted to "laugh at 'fundies' getting smacked down," I would probably pick some case where they'd actually been smacked down. The state did not shut down Sweet Cakes and has taken no action against them, other than to say the case is being looked into. The store owners closed it down themselves, even though (per the reports Williamson links to) they were doing slightly more business due to people supporting them on "religious" grounds. If they don't even want to have to defend themselves on the merits against a possible state action that hasn't yet happened, don't ask me to take their claims of martyrdom seriously.

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  14. montag22:58 PM

    Or, "Burning Aqua Buddha," but then someone would think it was just anti-fracking posturing about burning tap water in Indiana.

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  15. Mooser3:00 PM

    "Don't compare your sin to my skin!"


    That's a snappy answer I can use when people criticize my tattoos. Thanks!

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  16. Mooser3:05 PM

    "the standard meaning of "public accommodation" for the purposes of all
    anti-discrimination laws includes any retail establishment where you can
    stroll in and pay money for something"



    Thank you. That is pretty plain. It pulls the rug out from "D Johnston" pretty neatly, but I doubt he'll notice the bruise from his ass hitting the floor.


    That's it, "D Johnston" civil rights is a zero-sum game. Whenever somebody gets a right, it must have been pried from the cold-dead, hands of some other, more worthy person, huh? And a nice, detailed knowledge of Civil Rights legislation you poesess, too.

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  17. Mooser3:07 PM

    "The one thing I've never been able to figure out is this: since there
    are so very many members of the general public that disgust them, why
    did they ever start a business that involved the public at all?"



    So that sinners could see the world of goods and services they could have if they only got right with God?

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  18. Mooser3:10 PM

    "I enjoy laughing at fundies and rightwingers."


    I used to, a lot. I thought they couldn't last for long against such sharp, fact-based, common-goddam-real-world-sense ridicule directed at them, which also pointed out their propensity for lying, too, in addition, also.
    But I was wrong, they seem to thrive on it.

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  19. Mooser3:14 PM

    "3. The law doesn't give a shit about what people think; it requires them to treat their customers in a non-discriminatory way."


    Well, don't you see? If they don't let those low-lifes and sinners through the front door, then they aren't cutomers, are they? Ergo, no discrimination! So clear!

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  20. Mooser3:17 PM

    "My turn: Does Sweetcakes have the right to refuse service to black people?"


    Told you, if they don't let them become customers in the first place, than how can they discriminate against them?

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  21. Mooser3:19 PM

    "Eh...I've never been behind this issue as much as some people."


    Nuff said, Johnston, nod's as good as a wink, mum's the word. After all, we know what "some people" are like.

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  22. JennOfArk3:30 PM

    So in five years there have been 11 complaints, five of which were not substantiated. This is not a sign of a widespread issue of public accommodations discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.
    In much the same way, in ten years there have been less than 100 convictions for voter fraud, out of something like 750 million - 1 billion federal election ballots cast (up that number by some hundreds of millions to include state and local elections), which is why the good folks at Reason (it's treason without the T) enthusiastically support strict voter ID laws.

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  23. coozledad3:31 PM

    You can get a lot of mileage out of that construction.
    Don't get your regulation in my salvation.
    Don't chap my ass with your chaps.
    Don't give me your filthy devil money

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  24. Jay B.3:33 PM

    From the Reason piece which is written by an apparent idiot to the whiny misinterpretation of "religious freedom" (HINT, you fucking dipshit baker: NO ONE IS FORCING YOU TO STOP BEING A HATEFUL GIT WHO BELIEVES IN THE INFINITE LOVE OF CHRIST, EXCEPT FOR DYKES AND FAGGOTS.), it's a perfect summation of the libertarian world view, misstate the facts and the principles involved then bitch about the government.

    From the Reason piece: So in five years there have been 11 complaints, five of which were not substantiated. This is not a sign of a widespread issue of public accommodations discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.

    Who the fuck said there WAS a widespread issue? Oh, here's his answer:

    I suggested then that perhaps it’s time to reconsider the idea of what counts as a “public accommodation” and also questioned whether we actually even need the government to resolve all cases of business bigotry.



    The "all cases" is a nice touch, when he just got finished saying that it barely happens at all. So, yes, in the rare cases that people treat potential customers like they have cooties because they are homosexuals, the state should step in because discrimination overrides the business' right to discriminate. They can still talk behind everyone's backs about how awful the gays are and no one can stop them. PRETTY FUCKING SIMPLE, LIBERTARIAN ASSHOLES.

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  25. JennOfArk3:52 PM

    The thing is, the public accomodation requirements don't say you have to serve everyone and like it, even. I don't know what's to stop a business owner from saying, "I don't agree with gay marriage on religious grounds so I might not be your best choice, but if you want me to do this work knowing how I feel, I will," which would both satisfy the law and the bigot's need to tell lesser individuals how inferior he considers them. Plus, it will get the bigot out of doing the job.

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  26. That's the way mature adults communicate, yes. Perhaps you can see which part of that equation is missing from the Reason column.

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  27. As Hob said, it's not a matter of regulating thought, it's a matter of regulating behavior in a very narrow context in which behavior has traditionally been regulated for a very long time.


    When you open a retail business in the US (for example), you register it with the government, agree to pay certain taxes, and agree to abide by certain rules. If you don't want to abide by the rules, you're free to not run a business. A hundred years ago, those rules didn't include "don't turn customers away or provide different prices/services solely because of their race/gender/nationality/religion/sexuality/whatever." Nowadays, thanks to the efforts of civil rights activists, they do. So in other words, if you're agreeing to provide a service to the public, you're agreeing to provide it equally, without these particular prejudices.


    It's not thought policing, any more than the government is suppressing my right to hate taxes (I don't, I'm just giving an example) every time they require me to pay taxes.

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  28. The one thing I've never been able to figure out is this: since there are so very many members of the general public that disgust them, why did they ever start a business that involved the public at all?

    It looked so wholesome and fulfilling when I was watching The Andy Griffith Show. But then suddenly a black man walked into my store and my dreams came crashing down around me. So you see, I'm the victim here.

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  29. MikeJ4:15 PM

    Don't forget, turning away a person with a gun is a violation of their rights and magically your rights as a business owner mean nothing to the Reason(sic) crowd.

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  30. Well I certainly won't be participating in any treason if no tea is provided.

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  31. For better or worse, this reasoning would seem to allow the bakery owners to write "Die, Faggot!" on every cupcake sold to an LGBT individual. You're correct in that it does satisfy the law while simultaneously discouraging perceived undesirables from patronizing a business, I'm just not sure of the legal ramifications or more importantly if this is the world we want to live in.

    A former Navy chaplain has beat you to the punch and suggested that whenever a photographer is "forced" to do a gay wedding against his religious inclinations that he print the bible verse from Romans 1:32 on the back of every photo which which in this context would imply that gays are worthy of death:

    "Though they know God's righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them.>


    I see that you're trying to resolve this issue in a way that satisfies both parties but it seems to me that having gays and lesbians receive inferior, insulting and/or threatening service harks back to whites only lunch counters and water fountains.

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  32. Mooser5:06 PM

    "So, yes, in the rare cases that people treat potential customers like they have cooties because they are homosexuals"


    It's even worse, actually. They do it because they perceive the people as homosexuals, not because they have any definite knowledge of their sexual practices. If you think about it, that makes anybody who wears the wrong clothes or has the wrong haircut, or uses the wrong speech inflections available to be discriminated against.
    Or if they damn well you're straight, but just don't like you for some reason.

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  33. MikeJ5:19 PM

    To be fair, it might come up while ordering a wedding cake.

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  34. Fats Durston5:22 PM

    "The homofascist rainbow-shirts are at it again," says Matt Barber about the case at Catholic Online. "They've unsheathed, once more, their anti-Christian long knives."

    Ah, yes, who can forget Kuchenacht, when the Sturmabteilung marched right into every Jewish business and demanded that even the Untermenschen be served challah. The parallels are so striking it's eerie.

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  35. JennOfArk5:34 PM

    Well, the thing is, you can't legislate good manners. I'm of course not advocating for anyone to refuse service to anyone else due to bigotry. But if a business owner wants to cut off his nose to spite his own face, in the end, there are plenty of ways he can do it while still living up to the letter of this law.

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  36. True dat.

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  37. Buffalo Rude6:08 PM

    Perceived martyrdom is a helluva drug.

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  38. Buffalo Rude6:14 PM

    "They've unsheathed, once more, their anti-Christian long knives"

    There goes another Gaydar(TM). I swear I'm gonna start sending these people my repair bills.

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  39. JennOfArk6:18 PM

    Get that Gaydar™ recalibrated. There's no mention there that the knives are throbbing.

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  40. Buffalo Rude6:23 PM

    Good suggestion. The poor thing has been taking a beating lately.

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  41. BigHank537:26 PM

    No, everyone's cupcakes have to say "Die, Faggot!" on them. Sure to be a big hit with the second-graders.

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  42. Buffalo Rude7:38 PM

    "Rights" are for things they support.

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  43. timb1177:43 PM

    Or the godforsaken commenters..,

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  44. WeWantPie8:24 PM

    What's wrong with answering "Both, but the second one's more fun" - ?

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  45. Magatha9:02 PM

    I served a hellish year as maid-of-honor, during the course of which service I sampled umpteen dozen wedding cakes at way too many wedding fairs, and it was always me and the bride. The groom-to-be had no interest in the details, so always it was two girls out auditioning bridal crap. Somebody might have made an assumption even though we didn't ever discuss having two wee girl-brides on top of the cake. I don't know why they'd be that stupid though, since it might offend us if they had been snarky, and that would have meant the risk of losing the sale, which means you hate capitalism or something. Jeez, you bake the cake, take the money, and hope for referrals.



    All that work I went through without resorting to fisticuffs (wedding prep is brutal) and they eventually got divorced. Straight folks is weird.

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  46. And they're not being shoved down anyone's throat.

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  47. hellslittlestangel10:49 PM

    The only thing worse than homofascists is christojerkoffs.

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  48. J Edgar11:11 PM

    We went to a bakery just because they were nearby and said we wanted to order a cake with a special design. As soon as they heard that they rudely interrupted and said they didn't do any sexual images. We were kind of taken aback but said that wasn't what we wanted.
    They showed us photos of some of their custom work. What crap. For all I know we were looking at salutes to sodomy. Who could tell? And super expensive.
    The wingers could try that approach. Oops, that bakery went out of business within a year.

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  49. stepped_pyramids11:28 PM

    I just want them to show me the part of the Bible where Jesus says "Thou shalt not baketh cakes for queers". Actually, I seem to recall that dude making a point of associating with sinners and social rejects.

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  50. calling all toasters11:36 PM

    So, if I understand their argument correctly (and I think I do), what they are saying is everyone who is not a bigoted, cognitively impaired fuckwad is Hitler.

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  51. Lurking Canadian12:00 AM

    It's the wingnut bible. The words in red are optional.

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  52. Liberty, not for queers... nor for chix!

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  53. AngryWarthogBreath12:04 AM

    They are also the entire SA, with maybe a hint of Goebbels.

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  54. The groom-to-be had no interest in the details, so always it was two girls out auditioning bridal crap.


    There's a "2 Girls, 1 Cake" joke in here somewhere.

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  55. AngryWarthogBreath12:26 AM

    Barber also finds a black preacher who rejects the civil rights argument: "Don't compare your sin to my skin!"

    Every time they get on their "Wait, wait - WE have a black guy, too!" (why, it's almost as if black people can have their own diversity of interests, some of which are still fucking wrong!) I always hear the moment from O Brother Where Art Thou, "We can hire us a little fella even smaller than Stokes's!" That's the kind of genius political mind Matt Barber's bringing to bear on us queerlicans. Oh, the horrors.



    Anyway, to said preacher: with all due respect, sir, please shut the fuck up with your bigoted and ignorant attitudes, because they make the world worse.

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  56. Waffle_Man12:48 AM

    I suggested then that perhaps it’s time to reconsider the idea of what counts as a “public accommodation” and also questioned whether we actually even need the government to resolve all cases of business bigotry.

    "All cases" of course means "Any cases whatsoever".

    This is an argument in favor of racially segregated lunch counters, as smarter people than me have pointed out.



    I tend to be against that, although I know at least a couple of libertarians will explicitly argue that businesses should be able to racially discriminate.


    But come on, don't use weasel words; you can't really make this argument against some forms of discrimination and not others.

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  57. AGoodQuestion1:14 AM

    I guess when you really want to tell inferior races/orientations/whatever how you feel about them, words aren't enough. You really need that icy door slam.

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  58. AGoodQuestion1:19 AM

    Dark Helmet: I see your anti-Christian long knife is as big as mine.

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  59. AGoodQuestion1:26 AM

    Just because it rhymes, that don't make it poetry.

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  60. Geo X2:04 AM

    Seriously. Homophobia these days is just pathetic. You spend all your time thundering about how it's an ABOMINATION UNTO THE LORD, and then you spend all your time fighting these ridiculously petty battles that have nothing to do with anything? Here's a hint, foax: if you're god REALLY hates the shit out of teh gay as much as you think he does, right now he's feeling mightily unimpressed that your battles against this scourge basically consist of low-level passive-aggressive dickishness. You're gonna have some 'splainin' to do when you reach those pearly gates.

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  61. smut clyde5:23 AM

    Presumably anyone invoking Night of the Long Knives comparisons sees themselves in the role of the SA.

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  62. Aimai6:29 AM

    When hope and history splat.

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  63. timb1177:16 AM

    The commenters at Reason say they can. In fact, they reject out of hand the mere suggestion that they -- at the very least -- enable racists.

    The poor dears. The last century has been so hard on them, what with income tax, then Social Security, a peacetime draft, the communist WPA (although, they still enjoy the pretty buildings), racial integration, and now right (special rights, no less) for the gays. It's hard to remember in that litany where the "libertarian" stops and the Republican begins, BUT IGNORE THAT LIBTARD.

    One has a feeling the 21st century will continue to baffle them, as Americans continue to deny a return to feudalism

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  64. timb1177:18 AM

    Of course, you meant Pennsylvania. Here in Indiana, even if we did have widespread frakking (and we do), we are good authoritarians and would never let some hippie document it

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  65. LittlePig7:30 AM

    I can't get past "Christian Libertarian".



    Damn you, Republican Jesus!

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  66. The freedom to make others less free is the most precious freedom of all.

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  67. LittlePig7:39 AM

    "And Saint Peter, I want you to know I followed the instructions in Leviticus to a T. I never engaged in homosexual behavior".


    "Yeah, OK...but ", St. Pete flips through some Heavenly paperwork, "our records show you often ate at Red Lobster".


    "Umm....yes".


    "And that you had the shrimp"


    "Sure, I love 'em!"


    Flames rose up through the suddenly open space under the diner's feet and he plummets, screaming all the while.



    Gabriel, watching the whole proceeding, gently chides St. Peter. "Why all the song and dance? You saw the guy had a poly-blend shirt when he walked up here"

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  68. Derelict7:45 AM

    This. They spend time screeching that God decreed homosexuality an abomination, but manage to ignore the vast bulk of what's actually in the Bible.
    God don't put up with no shatnetz shit!

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  69. It's even worse, actually. They do it because they perceive the people as homosexuals, not because they have any definite knowledge of their sexual practices.

    This. I suspect that in more cases than not, people are subject to anti-gay discrimination because their status as "gay" has been arbitrarily assigned to them by their victimizers. People don't choose to be gay, but sometimes it is a matter of choice. Someone else's choice, not yours.

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  70. redoubt8:11 AM

    "Save 40% in our Get Right With God Sale!"

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  71. redoubt8:15 AM

    "The Burning Krugerrand: Why Gold-Based White Supremacy is Best For America"

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  72. redoubt8:24 AM

    Somewhere Ernst Roehm is laughing.

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  73. glennisw8:42 AM

    So if the gay couple went into the bakery simply to buy a dozen cookies and the owner refused to serve them you'd be cool with that? What if he refused to sell a dozen cookies to a black man? Still cool with that?

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  74. glennisw8:48 AM

    I think, too, Sweetcakes' discrimination is related to the nature of the job. I'm sure they're perfectly happy taking money from a gay couple (or black people) for a dozen cookies or a pie for Sunday dinner. But because it's a wedding cake, for a GAY wedding, suddenly they want to discriminate on the basis of their religious belief being oppressed because - a gathering of people they don't approve of will be eating their cake. This is like asking someone whether they'll be serving Sauterne with that cream pie, and refusing it sell it because they disapprove of alcohol.

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  75. wasserst8:51 AM

    Once again I note that libertarians almost never admit the logical conclusion to this line of reasoning: they'd use state power to enforce businesses' "right" to discriminate. There's simply no other way to to so.

    I can't imagine why they might be hesitant to admit that.

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  76. Jeffrey_Kramer9:57 AM

    Or as a followup on the recent, justly celebrated "gag reflex" essay: "If your sex makes me sick, you must chop off your dick."

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  77. shortstop10:18 AM

    When I need a break from poking myself in the eye with a sharp stick, listening to Nickelback or watching Sarah Palin try to complete a sentence, I like to check out the NOM Facebook page. Through carefully selected, highly manipulative language, these people are geniuses at whipping the rubes into frenzies of outrage at losing their time-honored, god-given freedom to oppress other people. Most of them have barely gotten through high school and genuinely believe that a "We Reserve the Right to Refuse Service" sign has full legal force (this is America! It's a private business!) even when applied to protected classes. Many can't see why an LGBT couple should mind shopping around until it finds vendors who observe the laws of the states in which they chose to open a business accommodating the public. Everyone thinks no one in business should ever have to do anything at all that goes against their consciences, and all are furious at the way Christian commerce is being specifically targeted in Obama's atheist Muslim America. They're tired of being liberals' whipping boy and they're not going to take it anymore!

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  78. dstatton11:19 AM

    Why does it have to be widespread? Maybe he'd prefer a class action suit against the bakery.

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  79. dstatton11:20 AM

    A lot of the verses in Leviticus end with "shall be put to death."

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  80. Mooser11:22 AM

    A man that plays a solid-body guitar would say that, wouldn't he?

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  81. Mooser11:25 AM

    "Get that Gaydar™ recalibrated."


    Yes, Gaydars made from E-meters often go out of whack.

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  82. Mooser11:31 AM

    "People don't choose to be gay, but sometimes it is a matter of choice. Someone else's choice, not yours."


    Wow, for a guy who plays a solid-body guitar, you are very smart, and compassionate, to boot.


    Never could understand that 'choice, not-a-choice' thing. It makes no difference to me. Whethjer or not I treat somebody with respect and decency has nothing to do with them, although I hope they benefit. You want to know the truth? I do it for me! Yup, I do it for me, because my life, and my self-respect, is better when I treat people with respect.

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  83. Mooser11:33 AM

    "The groom-to-be had no interest in the details,"


    As for me, I was only interested, but vitally interested you might say, in one detail of the wedding plans: Was her Dad's shotgun loaded?

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  84. Mooser11:37 AM

    "Perceived martyrdom is a helluva drug."


    Yeah, but it's easy to quit taking it. I've done it a thousand times.

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  85. Mooser11:39 AM

    "Save 40% in our Get Right With God Sale!"


    Gosh, maybe indulgences aren't such a bad idea.

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  86. Gay Thetans mess up the works.

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  87. witlesschum12:37 PM

    Mr. Preacher should also reflect on whether or not he really wants to associate with the people who make church-based voter drives and such a necessity for black people, but not so much for whites.

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  88. Playing my heavy alder plank with its bolt-on neck and infernal tuning issues (damn tremolo!) has taught me much about life.

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  89. Fenderphobia is a little-recognized and pernicious form of bigotry.

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  90. Levi T. Icus1:42 PM

    Red Lobster Republicans are the fucking worst!

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  91. I would stick with 3 syllables. like the original. "Burning Jerk." "Burning Dick." "Burning Dolt."

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  92. tigrismus2:31 PM

    I wonder what the people who throw a nutty if a cashier doesn't wish them a merry Christmas the day after Halloween would do if they were refused service?

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  93. M. Krebs2:57 PM

    Unsheathed? Why does he assume that they're all uncircumcised?

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  94. Sometimes the slope really is slippery.

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  95. Mooser3:53 PM

    Look, the sharp stick can be recovered from, but Nickelback? That shit is fatal!

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  96. Mooser3:55 PM

    See you at The Bunker! It was the link on this site which got me over there. I was looking for survival-decorating tips, but I like what I found there.

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  97. Mooser3:56 PM

    "when the Sturmabteilung marched right into every Jewish business and demanded that even the Untermenschen be served challah"


    MJy parents always referred to it, in hushed tones, as kugelnacht

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  98. Mooser3:59 PM

    "Playing my heavy alder plank with its bolt-on neck and infernal tuning issues (damn tremolo!) has taught me much about life."


    Good Lord, when you put it that way, I should think it would! I mean, wouldn't I? Yup, I would. You think you've got it bad? I play the Hammond organ.

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  99. Mooser4:01 PM

    As slippery as your fretboard?

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  100. Damn! I hope you play it through a big ol' Leslie.

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  101. I opted for rosewood over maple.

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  102. Howlin Wolfe4:18 PM

    I don't see where you got that out of Triplanetary's comment. I thought he was saying that he was cool with the anti-discrimination laws and regs. He was saying the law wasn't regulating thought, but behavior. Why would you ask such non-sequitur-implying questions?

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  103. PersonaAuGratin5:11 PM

    There's a good argument for eloping to Vegas in there as well.

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  104. Mooser5:20 PM

    "Fenderphobia is a little-recognized and pernicious form of bigotry."

    We find the defendant guilty as hell, Your Honor! Yup, I got it bad, and that ain't good. I can only plead mitigation on the grounds of kainophobia, a pervasive linophobia (ever have one of your Ernie Balls snap?) and a roaring case of pentheraphobia,(look, you don't know her) Not to mention stenophobia, since the necks are so thin. Plus, Hendrix aggravates my brontophobia . From such afflictions you shouldn't know.


    And I don't really know what my mother-in-law has to do with it, except that she scares the hell out of me.

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  105. Halloween_Jack6:11 PM

    No need to wonder, really--Xmasrage is the gift that keeps on giving. Heck, even Palin was going to do a book on it until someone told her that no one would write a big advance check on something that was destined for the remainder tables.

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  106. Halloween_Jack6:17 PM

    The Schwarzwälder Kirschtorte of democracy must be refreshed from time to time with the Kirschwasser of Christopatriots and homotyrants.

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  107. Halloween_Jack6:21 PM

    All that work I went through without resorting to fisticuffs (wedding prep is brutal) and they eventually got divorced. Straight folks is weird.


    I worked for a short time for a wedding caterer, and the head cook had absolutely no speck of romanticism left in her. "You wanna know if they're gonna make it work in the long run? Flip a coin."

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  108. You can win over the whole courtroom if you pull out your B3, call in your sidemen and offer a rousing rendition of "Green Onions." You can hate my Fenders with a 1000-sun heat if you do that and I won't care.

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  109. Halloween_Jack6:27 PM

    Abolitionists: concerned about oppression, or just taking the piss?

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  110. Duncan6:27 PM

    "Leviticus doesn't count if you're a Christian--no, really, Jesus said that" -- (If I dood it, I get a whippin' ... I dood it!) Could you quote me chapter and verse on that?

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  111. Duncan6:32 PM

    "Thou shalt not baketh cakes for queers" -- Jesus would have spoken proper Jacobean English, not this subliterate gibberish. If the Authorized Version was good enough for Jesus, it's good enough for me!

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  112. Duncan6:36 PM

    I always point out to such people that Christianity (or any other religion) is a choice, and antigay bigotry is a choice, so of course they won't object to my picking on them relentlessly for their lifestyle choice. I'm not going to delegate this to the government, mind you. If you want something done right, do it yourself.

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  113. By the way, is there a name for the fear of loud human voices? Fear of loud noises in general is ligyrophobia, but I have a dog who is particularly terrorized by loud conversation among humans. She cannot distinguish between anger and good, burly cheer. If the humans start to get loud and boisterous, she will begin to tremble uncontrollably. This does not happen when I plug my Strat into my terrifyingly loud '80s vintage Peavey Classic.

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  114. Waffle_Man7:38 PM

    Wow, I hadn't even thought to look at the comments.


    Those people are terrible at arguing.


    I say this as somebody with strong libertarian sympathies, too.


    I do think that the libertarian argument I hear every once and a while that "The free market would've eliminated segregated businesses!" is incredibly naive and pernicious.

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  115. BigHank537:58 PM

    Somewhere on the web there's a photo of a guy proudly displaying his new tattoo of the no-homos verse of Leviticus. Another one of the Levitical laws, of course, condemns "marks upon the body" as an abomination....

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  116. BigHank538:06 PM

    Time for Rand Paul to make a speech while he's on fire.


    The best part is that it would be a short speech.

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  117. BigHank538:14 PM

    How about Hebrews 8-13? It's a bit fuzzy (like much of the good book) but it can certainly be used to argue against the OT.

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  118. BigHank538:47 PM

    Never mind the nutty over being turned away by someone who doesn't care for bible-bashers. I ask you to imagine how their heads would explode when they found out it was 100% legal.


    There was a court case a while back. Some pushy church in IIRC Staunton, VA, sued to get the right to distribute little newsletters in the local elementary school in order to try and get the little tykes & their families to come to their services. They won with the caveat that any local church could also get their newsletter distributed. The local Unitarians invited all the kids over for a Samhain celebration. The pushy god-botherers got the point, surprisingly enough.

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  119. Nah, they've got nothing on Applebees' Salad Bar Centrists!

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  120. It's the equivalent of the Canadian "eh"... a verbal tic.

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  121. Can't have treason without "T".

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  122. JennOfArk9:11 PM

    Burning Galt.

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  123. HenryHolland11:49 AM

    We need to define Fenderphobia.


    Against Strats and that damned curved neck? Fully justified.


    Telecasters and Jaguars, not cool.


    P-basses and the awesome Jazz Bass, totally not cool.

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  125. manuel4:51 PM

    The homofascist rainbow-shirts are at it again," jajaja seo estafadores

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  126. Mooser5:37 PM

    You're right, it'll probably end up on the reindeer tables. But they eat the stuff up. You know, like Rudolph was Lindbergh or something.

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  127. Mooser5:40 PM

    Well, on the stand, I'd probably use my Nord C2. Booker T uses one, too!
    AT 39 lbs. it makes a quick escape easier.

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  128. You mean when you bolt for the courtroom door when Perry Mason finally exposes you as the murderer?

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