National 'Education' Association: YOU OWN THIS IGNORANCE.
John Birch Society paranoia PLUS War on Terror paranoia -- that's brilliant. Sometimes it's hard to believe they extemporize!
Sunday, April 21, 2013
NEW VOICE COLUMN UP....
.... about Boston. It runs long, but I had a superabundance of material. For example: The Czech Republic's press release, forced by general ignorance, that told people Chechans were not from the Czech Republic but from Chechnya, might prompt any number of reactions -- but check out this amazing response:
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Twenty-three years in the classroom here. The fact of the matter is that Chechnya has never and will never appear on a California state standardized test, so no teacher in California will ever address the existence of Chechnya. If you want us to produce well-rounded individuals, you need to let us do it, for god's sake. Either put Chechnya on the friggin' test or back the hell off when we try to broaden students' horizons.
ReplyDeleteWhatever the violence, the rethoric can always get worse. Oh, and let's spike on the ignorance graph.
ReplyDeleteYeah, teachers are to blame for Jimmy not knowing his ass from the hole in the ground he inhabits.
ReplyDeleteJohn Birch Society paranoia plus War on Terror plus non sequitur attack on teacher's unions. It's a hat trick, after shitting in your hat.
ReplyDeleteOoh! A three-pager. That's a lot of wingnuttery from the brethren.
ReplyDeleteAnd for them, being a literal shithead can't be that embarrassing.
ReplyDeleteWell, if more Bostonians had guns somebody could've shot that Saudi guy before he weaseled out of trouble by being "innocent."
ReplyDeleteOh, I think the wingnutz litany can undo any amount of education. These bozos may have left the public classroom with enough knowledge to get by, but, let's face it, a few hours of listening to Alex Jones or Flush Bimbaugh or Sean Hannity or the Savage Weiner can obliterate a lifetime of effort by educators.
ReplyDeleteTo wit: I went looking for an updated casualty list for the West, TX, explosion, since it had been a couple of days and the events in Boston had pushed it out of the news cycle. On just the first Google page of hits, there were the suppositions that:
a) The plant was hit by a meteor.
b) The plant was the target of a drone attack
c) The government used some sort of sonic/microwave/laser/death ray to blow up the ammonium nitrate at the plant
d) Three other more general assertions that the fertilizer plant was blown up by the government to instill panic in the public or to divert attention from some more nefarious scheme.
No amount of high school chemistry (or civics) can overcome the desire for the irrational and the bizarre. Evidence, schmevidence.
I would wager, at this late date, that a fair number of people still can't find Iraq on a map, so, maybe even the reputationally pessimistic Ambrose Bierce exhibited a bit too much optimism in that aphorism of his about war and God and geography.
ReplyDeleteSo, even if the fearmongers were to get their way and we bombed Chechnya (or the Czech Republic, for that matter), there's no guarantee that it would demonstrably change the geography quotient of the U.S.
I mean, this is difficult, folks, especially when Texas alone thinks it's the sole center and focal point of the universe.
And, just wait until we start in on the continent of Africa, with its sixty-odd countries. The mind boggles.
Could you imagine the uproar if the Dagestan Duo had been described as "Caucasians"? These schmucks would be screaming about anti-white bias.
ReplyDeleteYou know, there are times when I just can't laugh at the thought that I live in a Nation of Shit-heads.
ReplyDeleteThe government used some sort of sonic/microwave/laser/death ray to blow up the ammonium nitrate at the plant
ReplyDeleteFunny how almost all conspiracy theories eventually drag poor old Nikola Tesla into the plot.
Yeah, right, just you wait until Glenn Beck exposes what that Saudi guy was up to.
ReplyDeleteAnd how virtually none of the theorists remember that it was J. P. Morgan who was funding him....
ReplyDeleteYou never, ever want a visa to visit Glennbeckistan. It's like on the old maps that marked uncharted territories as "there be monsters."
ReplyDeleteWhen I was in seventh grade, our homeroom teacher made us memorize the maps of South American and Africa, and identify the countries and capitals on a blank map. Last year, I met a guy from Burkina Faso (formerly Upper Volta) in the dojo and I shocked the hell out of him when I asked him if he was from Ouagadougou.
ReplyDeleteI'm impressed by Jacobson's ability to dodge: his legion of home-schoolers fuck up geography, and it's the fault of the underfunded public education system.
ReplyDeleteI think ownership of ignorance is all the rage in our Ownership Society.
Ouagadougou, while being one of the poorest places on earth, has an annual film festival which is actually fairly well attended. They really like movies.
ReplyDeleteWell, selective assignment of ownership, anyway. They certainly aren't owning up to their fuckups.
ReplyDeleteIndeed it is all they know and Roy could have written his column 2 months before the bombing and have got it all correct. I wish that there was an "adult diapers sold" ticker thing like the national debt one. That industry will have been making out like bandits.
ReplyDeleteHmm, so the right-wing positions are:
ReplyDelete1) Kids, don't listen to your teachers, they're liebruls
2) More teachers should be fired, and the rest should be paid less (to, um, motivate them)
3) More standardized tests, less critical thinking, less general knowledge
4) If my kid doesn't know something (anything), it's the fault of teachers
Plus, honestly, how many right-wingers know jack-all about Chechnya or the Czech Republic?
(Bonus: Remember when John McCain repeatedly referred to Czechoslovakia in 2008, despite its dissolution in 1993? Was that the National Education Association's fault? Were the giant gaps in the knowledge of Jacobson's beloved Sarah Palin their fault, too? Suddenly, Jacobson disapproves of ignorance? Will wonders never cease!)
Just because they're pissing and shitting their pants doesn't mean there are diapers involved....
ReplyDeleteCan Sarah see Czechoslovakia from her house?
ReplyDeleteIndeed montag2, you have have a point
ReplyDeleteWell, in McCain's defense, he never crashed a plane there, so he's not likely to have any lasting impressions of the place.
ReplyDeleteBut... I heard there was gold there.
ReplyDeleteGold thieves, maybe.
ReplyDeleteTypical Glenn Beck listeners.
ReplyDeleteAt a certain point it's better to ignore such crap as political commentary and enjoy it as fiction. Crappy fiction, sure. Everything is connected! There are no coincidences! The government exploding a random chemical plant in rural Texas is obviously the pretext to them unleashing, well...who knows. They sure don't. None of them have any clue what the endgame of their own conspiracy is, but every random disaster or tragedy gets heaped onto the pile of evidence that said ending is obvious and inevitable. It's like listening to the world's worst Tom Clancy imitator drunkenly tell you about all the 'new ideas' he has for books, even though he has yet to write a single sentence.
ReplyDeleteYOU OWN THIS IGNORANCE.
ReplyDeleteHow kind of you to share it.
Of course, when Homeschool Johnny tries to get a job and finds out that pi doesn't equal 3, and America wasn't founded by Jesus and Ronald Reagan in 1947, he's the victim of discrimination. Education's a tricky business.
Say what you will about Gold Bond powder, at least it's a real product.
ReplyDeleteThat's funny. I'm reminded of the disappointment of my first day of college, looking around and seeing that we were nothing but a bunch of high school seniors four months later.
ReplyDeleteIf it's a dog whistle I don't think it's for a specific bugbear of theirs. I think it's more a general, "It was Czechoslovakia when I was a kid and dag nabbit if I'll keep up with all the nonsense furriners do."
ReplyDeleteThey understood very quickly that the West explosion 1) was a pure example of unregulated, unfettered rapine and the easily corrupted "local control" that permits it; 2) that a moderately functional EPA would have prevented it; 3) that they had the blood of first responders on their hands (again); and 4) that they needed Federal money to clean it up. Bill Flores was on th' teevee the next morning worried more about legal ramifications for the plant than his blasted constituency.
ReplyDeleteSo, hell, "Communist Martian Gubmit False Flag Conspiracy" isn't just the usual idiocy. It's the smoke bombs they set off as their best chance of escape.
Which was intended as a reply to montag. Fuckin' J-S Kit.
ReplyDeleteThe taxpayers pick up the tab.
ReplyDeleteI figured the head would be located much lower in the torso.
ReplyDeleteI'd actually like a drunk Clancy imitator. The regular version can't write for shit.
ReplyDeletethe search for El Loco Dorado
ReplyDeleteNot in them thar hills...
ReplyDeleteWait until next year's Girl Scout cookies are distributed via Bradley M3 armored personnel carriers. . .
ReplyDeleteYeah. These are the same people so terrified of overreaching government action that they won't permit background checks for guns lest it lead to gun registry and yet they pretend to want the FBI to keep permanent tabs on American citizens on behalf of our commie traditional enemies.
ReplyDeleteFunny you should mention "false flag operations". The first question Deval Patrick got at his first press conference following the bombing was: "Is this another [another??? There've been OTHERS???] false flag attack staged attack to take our civil liberties?" Judging by the smug look on Alex Jones's face when hearing Patrick's answer: "No. Next question.", he was probably thinking "Ha!!! That denial only goes to show how high this conspiracy reaches!".
ReplyDeleteIt's sickly amusing, the priorities some people make.
ReplyDeleteIt's the same old Libertarian asscovering... well. wiping, really.
ReplyDeleteHmm... on second thought, maybe I WILL pick up that AR15 before it's too late...
ReplyDeleteThat was me, aimai, my fingers are rusty with disuse because they were commandeered by government storm troopers on Friday trying to prevent more bombings. Thank goodness the full weight of Texas govt will be bent on doing the exact opposite and making sure there are no lessons learned.
ReplyDeleteDumbshits promoting other dumbshits; if too many competent folks get
ReplyDeletethrough the doors, it might fuck up the cozy arrangement the senior
dumbshits have got going.
Ah, I see you've looked through some MBA program brochures.
"[another??? There've been OTHERS???"
ReplyDeleteNewtown, Aurora <- according to crazy people.
It's the broadening of horizons thing that gets the wingnuts so upset. First you're pointing out Chechnya on a map, next thing you know, the kids are thinking for themselves. And THEN where are you? Anarchistan, that's where!
ReplyDeleteFor instance, the repeated flagrant violator of just about every possible regulation who owned the West, TX fertilizer plant is the real victim. Why, the folks at his church say he's just devastated. The poor man was even at Bible study when his repeatedly criminally negligent business blew up and killed people. In this crazy, mixed-up world we live in, who can really say who's to blame? I mean, I'd go with the guy who had 1300x the amount of ammonium nitrate that's supposed to trigger DHS oversight, but that's because I'm a leftist who supports teachers' unions.
ReplyDeleteBecause neither of them is that stupid.
ReplyDeleteActually, in many ways John McCain is a very stupid man.
Have you ever known anyone who lost count of the number of houses he owned?
ReplyDeleteGod, if we could only get the Bradleys away from the the Army and into the hands of the Girl Scouts. They, being practical, would take one look at the overhead involved with owning the things and melt them down for scrap immediately.
ReplyDeleteI just read somewhere this morning that, because of West, TX's Czech heritage (from 19th century immigrants), and the ignorant conflation of Czechs and Chechens, there is actually a conspiracy theory floating around that the two incidents are connected.
ReplyDeleteGod, if only it was fiction. The sad part is that these shmoes have seen modernity squeeze the traditional version of God out of their lives, and they're trying to fill the hole with something else: chemtrails, men in black, the Trilateral Commission, Agenda 21, jack-booted gun grabbers, commie race-mixers, one-worlders.
ReplyDeleteThey couldn't give a shit about the conspiracy itself, or it goals. What they're craving is the feeling that someone is in charge. Reality, with its mishmash of conflicting motives and competencies, is just too fucking scary.
And make jewelry with the metal, earning crafts AND recycling badges!
ReplyDeleteMy mother was born and raised a few miles down the road from West, TX. As she recalls it, the town was full of "Bohemians" - an ethnic identity, not hippies. But I'd be willing to start a conspiracy theory that it was a leftist radical enclave!
ReplyDeleteWell, also the right wingers think teacher should spend a goodly amount of time occupied with firearms training. To hell with geography!
ReplyDeleteI have to laugh at the false flag "proof" I've seen. "Look, here's the guy who supposedly lost both legs, and he clearly still has two legs!" Yeah, he's also changed his clothes in mere seconds and grown a new, completely different face.
ReplyDeleteMy mother grew up a few miles down the road, and as she recalls it, her Bavarian-American community always referred to West's ethnicity as "Bohemian." Not hippies, though.
ReplyDeleteOne wonders what Alex Jone's shill EXPECTED Patrick to answer. "Actually, yes it is a false flag attack - and you will report what I tell you to or the drones will get you!"
ReplyDeleteWell, at least they've got one good rhapsody to lay claim to.
ReplyDeleteI, for one, would like to be the first to welcome our new Brownie overladies.
ReplyDeleteToo true. Randomness cannot be controlled or held to account or even planned for. It's like the heavens above are filled with cold, uncaring stars--many of which died eons ago but continue to shine because light of their death hasn't reached us yet.
ReplyDeleteJust think about how much better the education system will be after we give all the teachers guns. I bet those little buggers will know Chechnya from Czech in seconds flat.
ReplyDelete"they were their own first line of defense if the terrorist came to their door....a well-armed terrorist who would have no reluctance in killing them after breaking into their homes."
ReplyDeleteSeems a little labor-intensive to me, terrorists going door-to-door. What would be he motivation of a terrorist breaking into someone's home? Seriously, are right wingers really so scared they imagine actual terrorists knocking on their front doors? For what? Magazine subscriptions?
Russia personally warned Obama himself a year ago that these kids were trouble
ReplyDeleteAnd if there's one area in which the Russian government has credibility, it's Chechnya.
All I got to say is that if George Bush were still President we'd be invading Armenia by now.
ReplyDeleteWell, I think it would have been funny if Governor Patrick had said, "Yes. GUARDS! TAKE THIS ONE TO THE PIT! ... Kidding!" But it's probably best that cooler heads prevailed.
ReplyDeleteHell, we'd be mounting a military operation against Anemia.
ReplyDeleteA leftist radical enclave? Scandal!
ReplyDeleteThose Rick Steves shows on PBS really are awesome, so I guess she can until we next elect a Republican president
ReplyDeleteAmway and the Mormon Church.
ReplyDeleteMany, many years ago, when NASA's Cassini probe was being launched, I encountered a hysterical fear-mongering page concerning the radiothermal generators the thing used for power. The idiots who wrote the things made a huge deal over the fact that there "was enough plutonium on board to kill everyone on Earth." This was, technically, true. You'd have to grind up the Pu, divide it into seven billion doses, and then wander the Earth, getting everyone to inhale a chunk into their lungs, where in ten years it would almost certainly give them cancer.
ReplyDeleteThe thing is, if you were going around administering this to everyone, you could just stick an icepick into them instead. It's be more reliable, and you wouldn't even have to wait ten years.
The right wingers aren't scared so much as wanting to believe they have some kind of significance.
I briefly supported the coup in Anomie, but it just couldn't hold my interest.
ReplyDeleteAnd picked Scary Sarah Palin for VP?
ReplyDeleteNow, that's a track record.
Reasonable people can hold a different opinion. I want to live in that reality.
ReplyDeleteThe ability to see patterns and connections is a useful skill. It's best, however, to wait until after the acid has worn off (or the anti-psychotics have kicked in) to use it.
ReplyDeleteDumbshits promoting other dumbshits
ReplyDeleteHow do you know so much about where I work?
Or a quick strike against Ammonia, which brings us right back to the explosion at West, Tx. Oh, dear, the conspiracists were right!
ReplyDeleteWi-fi in the bathroom allows you to lead an active wingnut life while keeping diaper costs to a minimum.
ReplyDeleteToo true. If fuckin' J-S Kit hadn't gone away, we wouldn't have to use this Disqus abomination.
ReplyDeleteThere's a study extant that's nearly been forgotten now, that covered a six-year period from about 1997-2003, on comparative productivity gains--U.S. vs Japan vs Germany, etc.
ReplyDeleteOne of the conclusions of the study was that the U.S. would have easily led the world in productivity increases during the period, except for the influence of U.S. corporate management, that by the time the managers had worked their magic, they'd evaporated about two-thirds of the gains produced by workers.
Just one more datum supporting the notion that we have a professional business class primarily composed of self-important idiots.
I suppose 'horny' could be considered a variant of 'stupid.'
ReplyDeleteBecause it's where everyone works.
ReplyDeleteI wanted to see if Disqus could be a less disgusting way of posting here than my usual round about methods. This is not a message, just a sign.
ReplyDeleteIt takes a nation of Shit-heads to hold us back.
ReplyDeleteIt's a sign. And multiple Disqus puns. Praise be to Enki!
ReplyDeleteAnyway, if you've gone to the trouble of setting up a login, you might as well get a saucy avatar illustration of some sort, too. Maybe something anthropological, like an atl-atl, or ... Okay, "atl-atl" is all I've got.
You just need to access "Edit Settings" from the little gear pulldown at the top of the comment thread. Then you can select "Avatar" and upload a photo. It will even allow you to crop it to the necessary square.
ReplyDeleteI've always wanted it to be "Little My" from Moomintroll, actually.
That would be awesome.
Right-wingers fear encyclopedia readers more than they fear terrorists.
ReplyDeleteYou make it look so easy. I'll get there in the end. If you have an uploadable link to that image (I can't get it to work) post it here, ok?
ReplyDelete"Bring me the bore worms!"
ReplyDeleteAww, nowadays it can't even sing.
ReplyDeleteActually, it doesn't. It just seems that way.
ReplyDeleteYou should be able to click on the image above and get a full-sized version. In Firefox, I can then right-click on the full-sized version and get "Save Image As"; there should be something similar available for your browser of choice. Then, using the Dashboard (accessible by means of that gear at the top of the comment thread -> Edit Settings -> Avatar), you should be able to use "Upload a new picture from your computer" to load the image you just saved back in.
ReplyDeleteIN ACCORDANCE WITH THE PROPHECY.
ReplyDelete... Or you could try the Googling for a source image, perhaps even managing to obtain one with green eyes.
ReplyDeletei'm going to keep trying. I did google successfully but somehow couldn't figure out how to save it into a format that the system needs. I'm going to get this right if it kills me, and when I do I'm going to change my avatar every day just because.
ReplyDeleteYay! I look like a really bad Charlie Brown character.
ReplyDeleteIt's as I always pictured you, aimai!
ReplyDeleteWell if we're all going to be Moominland characters, dibs on the Hemulen.
ReplyDeleteHOORAY! Now we just need to get all the fundamentalist Protestants to vote for a Moomin.
ReplyDeleteI love the Hemulen. I have a theory that Moominpapa at Sea is really "To the lighthouse" with moomins.
ReplyDeleteOh, please, please, sue the livin' shit out of the bastard. Kick Beck in the wallet, hard, because that's all he understands.
ReplyDeleteThere have got to be lawyers out there praying to whatever god lawyers believe in, "have him call me, lord, please!," because this is about as open-and-shut a case of slander as one is likely to find. Malice, in this instance, will be a walk in the park to prove.
Oh my god, now I'm jealous. Hemulen is truly Hemulenish.
ReplyDeleteMoominpappa for President!
ReplyDeleteThe way they call themselves 'Bohemians' and 'Moravians', it's as if they're trying to DISGUISE THEIR REAL IDENTITIES.
ReplyDeleteKnew a girl named Mimi from there. Died of consumption. Very sad.
ReplyDeleteWE'RE WAITING.
ReplyDeleteThis has been a most helpful conversation. Behold, Monster Centipede Babydoll!
ReplyDeleteThis reminds of something I think was in--wait for it--The Flintstones. Fred and Barney are looking for a guy with a limp. They see a guy and Barney says, "That's him, Fred." Fred says, "Bah-nee, I thought the guy we're looking for has a limp." Barney says, "He was walking without a limp to fool us!"
ReplyDeleteYes, this is what we're reduced to, when we speak of these citizens and their insights.
Somewhere in that is a thrilling new meaning for the term "teaching to the test." The HOT LEAD test, kids.
ReplyDeleteSo, what you're saying is, there are enough ice picks on earth to kill everyone several times over. Thanks for nothing, MSM.
ReplyDeleteI'll just leave this here.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9n11xtjZ3Y
Apropos nothing: I can't hear "West, Texas" without thinking of Marty Robbins.
ReplyDeleteGirl Scouts don't need no tanks.
ReplyDelete