Wednesday, October 31, 2012

AIR RAGE. Ed Driscoll at Instapundit points to this YouTube audio from The Dennis Miller Show. Made a transcript:
CALLER: I've been a flight attendant for just about 30 years, and for years, I like to call them the 15 hour hostage crisis on these long hauls that I fly, you're together 16 hours, and for years, you know, I think all light attendants assume everyone is Democrat, and I've just listened or I just stay busy, and they're angry, angry, but as I've gotten older, it's kind of when Bush was in, I gave 'em the international stop sign, I said, "Love Rumsfeld, voting' for Romney." And talk about squelching any conversation for the rest of the 15 hours. Seriously, And over the years I've realized that the flight attendants tend to overwhelming be kind of snarky angry Democrats. However, my husband is a pilot, and they tend to almost all be Republican.
MILLER: Oh that's interesting, that's interesting.
CALLER: And I used to attribute it to them being ex-military, but we're getting more and more civilian pilots through the hearts. But I felt like I kinda had to hang with them sometimes.
MILLER: I can imagine when you first cranked up a Rumsfeld-Romney comment in front of the rest of the stews, the oxygen masks must have dropped down 'cause it decompressed.
CALLER: This one flight attendant called Rumsfeld the spawn of Satan, and I said, "Love Rummy!" I go, "Love him!"
MILLER: You should have said, oh by the way, the guy in 3A wants a Rum and Coke, doll!
CALLER: I wasn't that fast on my feet! But now I'll just go, "Love Romney."
MILLER: It's comin' around, Janet.
CALLER: You see that gal, it's like, now, Nana Jan, she is saying' it loud and sayin' it proud, and then they just, that's it.
MILLER: Listen, you gotta be your own dame. You know that. Seeing a lot more signs in yards, Janet. It's good anecdotal stuff for Romney. I didn't see any last time. People were afraid to get their house bricked. But I see a lot of signs. I think something's tectonically turned out there. Thanks for the call, Janet.
Soooo the new rightwing thing is flight attendants are prejudiced against Republicans but we're gonna show them because we have the pilots and yard signs.

I realize this is the 24-hour rah-rah stage of the campaign season but Jesus Christ, that's sad. And the worst part: Flight attendants don't take tips, so Dr. Mrs. Ole Perfesser and the Go Galt crew have no way to show them their disapproval.

Up next: Those damn tailors are all Obamabots, I can tell by the way they crease my trousers. But all the haberdashers are voting for Romney!

UPDATE. I should add that Miller having this on his show isn't the weird part -- air time is hard to fill, and as the rightwing talk radio form is as mysterious to me as Kabuki this just might be how they roll. What's weird is the preservation and circulation of the conversation by rightbloggers, as if there's something meaningful or uplifting in it. I'm not sure I get it. Do they actually take perverse comfort in declaring yet another area in American life (like the arts, academia, scientific research, etc.) Democrat-infested? Or do they just like the punchline that pilots are Republicans (except maybe Chesley Sulllenberger)? Maybe because pilots give flight attendants orders, they think this makes them superior...

Ugh, I have to stop thinking about it. Put on my tombstone that I got my abnormal psychology degree from the school of hard knocks.


  1. Spaghetti Lee10:44 PM

    Yeah, because flight attendants just love dealing with loudmouths of all descriptions after spending 20 hours a day on a damn plane. They all just dream of spending a transcontinental flight talking politics.

    Given that they claim to be the party of PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY HAFTA WORK FOR A LIVING DERP DERP, they sure seem to lack any fucking contact with people who have jobs. Everything in the Republican mind is a prop or a piece of furniture, and that absolutely includes other people and especially workers. They think they're so goddamn special that everyone just needs to spend their day sucking up to them and humoring their bullshit. Tell you what, lady, if I ever happen to be a flight attendant on your plane, I'll fill your rum and coke with transmission fluid.

  2. XeckyGilchrist10:45 PM

    Dr. Mrs. Ole Perfesser and the Go Galt crew have no way to show them their disapproval.

    I'm sure they'll think of something. Maybe ringing the little attendant bell and saying they can't figure out how to adjust their seat belt, every few minutes.

  3. It has honestly never once occurred to me in dozens of flights to care about the political beliefs of the air crew, nor have I ever once announced, apropos of nothing, that I love Sec. Def Gates or Hilary Clinton or even Barack Obama.

  4. "Leon Panetta! Love that guy. Love him."

  5. "Seeing a lot more signs in yards, Janet. It's good anecdotal stuff for Romney. I didn't see any last time. People were afraid to get their house bricked."

    Or maybe it was because he got beat by McCain and wasn't running in November, when most of the signs for president go up.

  6. paleotectonics10:58 PM

    What an insufferable twat.

    Either one of them.

    And she has one hell of a fantasy life for the reasons spelled out by S.Lee - I also could spend all day spinning up straw conversations with my lunicidal coworkers. But except for the rare occasion when bullshit MUST absolutely be called out, life is quieter and easier with a job that I must keep if my coworkers and myself, per a sort of understood truce, no one's political orientation is too secret, keep our yappers shut at work. Off hours, have at it, but you ain't gonna have much of a social life - "How's the salmon?" "The liberals are attempting to abort the rich." "Um, peachy."

    No one, just for grins, just as an ice breaker, says Rumsfeld is Satan. No one!.

    That's what we call pillow talk, baby.

  7. wileywitch10:58 PM

    Pilots are officers. Officers may skew Republican. Enlisted not so much, I think. Anyway Obama is getting a lot of support, donations, and votes from the military crowd.

    If at all possible, I would like to see Obama in his second term just crushing this Republican presumption that the Armed Forces belongs to them and is composed entirely of Republicans and that Democrats are sissies who don't know what "strength" means.

  8. BigHank5311:00 PM

    We can only hope that the pride of the UT law school, Glenn Harlan Reynolds his very own self, elects to represent his wife when she's trying to get her name off the no-fly list. I'll be getting that transcript fucking framed.

  9. Yeah, keep humping those yard signs, Dennis. A most excellent indicator of an effective local ground operation.

    Organizers hate those things.

  10. Dennis Miller is still alive?

    When his career died I just assumed he'd had the decency to go with it.

  11. MyPetGloat11:23 PM

    Commercial pilots "tend to almost all be" Republicans?


    Commercial airline pilots have seen their wages plummet over the past 20 years, and their pensions and benefits are eroding. I've read some pilots use food banks to get by.

    The pilots who belong to unions are militant.

    I can't imagine any sane commercial pilot supporting Randian Republicans, given the appalling conditions many of them are slaving under.

  12. Another Kiwi11:27 PM

    "You see that gal, it's like, now, Nana Jan, she is saying' it loud and sayin' it proud, and then they just, that's it."
    I'm assuming that this a cultural reference which I do not know about rather than the tangential ravings of a sub-standard workplace ass-wipe.
    From this we are to assume that the skies are full of mean Liberals? Or what? Really what is this supposed to prove?

  13. Fats Durston11:30 PM

    Scoring at home
    Liberals-who-clam-up-when-confronted-with-live-Conservatives: 0, stale trope
    Conservative-oppressed-at-work-due-to-Lib-co-worker-cruel-Othering-of-rightwing-hero: 0, tired cliche
    Mindlessly-borrowing-African-American-English-phrasing-to-indicate-enthusiasm: 0, embarrassing
    Airplane-servants-as-site-of-encounter: 3, for originality; hey, at least it's not a snooty Liberal dinner party or imaginary bus ride!

  14. Fats Durston11:32 PM

    If I were an asshole, I might post this:

    Okay, I'm an asshole.

  15. You know, I've taken a number of trans-Pacific flights, and I don't recall any attendants abruptly declaring their political affiliations. Perhaps I was asleep when that happened.

    But yeah, another classic example of wingnut humor - say something mildly rude, and then watch as the imaginary liberal who lives in your head gets really upset. Charming group of folks, truly.

  16. they sure seem to lack any fucking contact with people who have jobs

    I'm not sure Miller has much contact with people period if that's how he imagines people react to spontaneous declarations of one's political beliefs. Funny how these little stories never include any awkward, stunned silence, huh?

  17. Oh Another Kiwi, I speak Jive.

  18. I can tell by the way they crease my trousers.

    Chicka-Wow Chicka-Wow Wow!

  19. T. Paine12:26 AM

    The kids these days are dressing left...

  20. horatius12:35 AM

    Dying is too good for the smug prick Dennis Miller.

    Irrelevancy, now that is worse than death.

  21. Formerly_Nom_De_Plume1:02 AM

    Listen, you gotta be your own dame.

    Has it ever been easier, in the history of reading, to hear something in someone's voice than it is to read something like the above and hear it in Dennis Miller's voice?

  22. Formerly_Nom_De_Plume1:05 AM

    I'm assuming that this a cultural reference which I do not know

    Let's test your cultural knowledge...

    Heyyyyyyy, sexy ladayyyy....

    Name the pudgy Korean who sings that.

  23. Another Kiwi1:13 AM

    Uh, Sun Myung Moon? Is it the Gangnam? I can't be arsed finding out what that is about.

  24. Spaghetti Lee2:59 AM

    Personally, I heard it in Eddie Valiant's voice. Or maybe Jack Nicholson's.

  25. Adrian3:54 AM

    I suspect the whole story was this caller's fantasy. She's not a flight attendant, not married to a pilot, and hasn't expressed her love for Rummy or Romney to anyone but her glass of wine.

  26. Yesterday, I rode the plane for the first time from the airport near my house, and ended up chatting with a lifelong liberal stewardess who has just flown from Arizona. We talked about the vagaries of the national airline industry, and then after a pause, she said, "You know, you may have heard us talking about you people, how we don't want you here. A lot of people are saying you all are taking the sky from us. Way I feel is, you don't own the sky." She paused and looked around the admittedly somewhat liberal food cart, with its vegetarian, kosher and halal meals. "Besides, look what we did with it. We had the sky for forty years, and look what we did with it!"

    You can't take the sky from meeeee…. unless you're Jane Galt.

  27. Oh, that Althouse! Drunk-dialing right-wing talk again!

  28. montag27:18 AM

    Well, of course it must be true that virtually all ALPA members are anti-union Republicans... it was on Dennis Miller's show!

  29. Provider_UNE7:33 AM

    Everything in the Republican mind is a prop or a piece of furniture, and
    that absolutely includes other people and especially workers.

    This. Add too it the octoplexian levels of projection, a smattering of hatred, and an pantload of fear, and you have the distillation of the party of white flight.

    Anecdorkal evidence seems to be the entirety of Miller's schtick these days.

    An aside, I have learned way more than I ever wanted to know about the lives of the "management" of the starbucks from which I type. Can't wait to get a homebound internet connection, so I can return to my previous ubiquity.

  30. There are so many "snarky, angry" things to say about this little exchange--how serious issue always devolve to sports team bravado, etc., etc., that I'll leave it to wittier pundits than me.

    The part that epitomizes the entire patriarchal fucked-up mindset of the modern wingnut conservatoid, however, is Miller's absolutely dismissively misogynistic attitude to a caller he purportedly agrees with.

    Although "janet" refers to herself and colleagues as flight attendants, Miller chooses to refer to her as both a "stew" and a "dame" (and suggest she refer to a colleague as a "doll"). This blatant lack of respect for his caller's self-image, who admittedly seems to be numb to such assholery (probably getting it in spades from her darling mad men pilots of the sky), really illustrates the fundamental lack of human decency that is at the core of conservative beliefs.

  31. Provider_UNE7:50 AM

    It is a treasure to read your thoughts from the future. :)

    in 7 hours

  32. Provider_UNE7:52 AM

    It would seem that I am also conducting conversatory activities from the future, and with myself as well.

  33. Provider_UNE7:56 AM

    But yeah, another classic example of wingnut humor - say something
    mildly rude, and then watch as the imaginary liberal who lives in your
    head gets really upset.

    Not only did I wish to see this again, I wanted to make sure that when "classic example" was entered into the google, that this construction might have a chance of making it to the front page.

    Damn, I miss you guys....

  34. montag27:57 AM

    If I am time-tripping, I note the complete absence of Montana Wildhack....

  35. reallysmall fish7:59 AM

    Dames, dolls, I was too busy thinking what fucking century this was supposed to be.

  36. redoubt8:25 AM

    Everything in the Republican mind is a prop or a piece of furniture

    IOW, something that can be stored in an offshore bank account.

  37. Uh, Sun Myung Moon?

    Sun Myung Moon died just recently. So, yes.

  38. I would like to have a long layover with this comment.

  39. mile high schlub.

  40. chuckling9:34 AM

    That's strange. When I fly Ridiculous Fantasy Air the stewardesses are like from the sixties only naked and they serve me Wild Turkey and a bong.

  41. Halloween_Jack10:03 AM

    Back in the day, when Miller was on SNL and used "cha-cha" to refer to both men and women (IIRC), that sort of thing could be chalked up to ironic hipsterism. Now, it's another hash mark on his scoreboard of sad bastardry.

  42. Halloween_Jack10:32 AM

    I'm reading this more as someone who's burnt out on flight attendance telling the younger stews to just shut the fuck up already, and using the political aspect of it to bitch about her job. I can't imagine anyone bringing up Rumsfeld in a negative light in a casual conversation unless their own spouse was serving in the military during the aughts, and in that case Janet (whose husband probably served in the Reagan Administration, at the latest) doesn't have much to say WRT the problems of modern military spouses; she just wants those young'uns to put a cork in it so that she can concentrate on her sudoku.

  43. tigrismus10:54 AM

    I've just listened or I just stay busy, and they're angry, angry, but as I've gotten older, it's kind of when Bush was in, I gave 'em the international stop sign, I said, "Love Rumsfeld, voting' for Romney."

    When I eavesdrop and inappropriately and antagonistically butt in to other people's conversations they respond negatively! Why they gotta be so ANGRY all the time?!!

  44. Substance McGravitas11:07 AM

    OT this Nordlinger defence of the right to say "squaw" is unbelievable.

  45. KatWillow11:21 AM

    My guess: the caller works at an airport, perhaps as a fast food or gift shop clerk. Sometimes overhears (or imagines) conversations between attendants, pilots, and those visible-only-to-her little people.

  46. yeah, i picked up on that - even in the midst of bitch session, the default is, "shut up and get back to work."

  47. Ellis_Weiner11:37 AM

    Dear Penthouse Forum: I was on a flight some months ago when a pretty lady with a Southern accent sat next to me and engagingly introduced herself. We chatted; she was impressed I was "an author." She managed to work into the convo that she was a Republican and a Christian, to which I responded with affable neutrality.

    The drinks cart came, she asked for Crown Royal, but they didn't have any. So the flight att. gave her two Canadian Clubs for the price of one. She drank both and got utterly smashed, and ended up leaning her pretty little head on my shoulder to take a nap. I never thought such a thing would happen to me and no, I didn't think of it as "getting head" until just now.

    The lady to my other side, a nurse (and a liberal) watched with concern as the belle banged and stumbled her way up the aisle as we deplaned, and moved forward to help her. Not me, though. The Lord helps those who help themselves, and what am I--her nanny?

  48. wileywitch11:40 AM

    I was 11 and 12 when airline pilot worship was rampant and stewardesses were just "glorified waitresses". I had to wonder why airline pilots weren't "glorified bus drivers" by that same logic. Commercial passenger flight personnel were one of those most gender dimorphic industries of the seventies and doesn't appear to have changed much since. It's as if sexual inequality had to be established and maintained in airspace.

  49. Ellis_Weiner11:45 AM

    The default is, "Yeah, I'm Dennis Miller, the one-eyed man in the kingdom of the blind, deaf, dumb, and un-hip. Thank you for your deference--it's why I'm here. Next!"

  50. Wingnut Flight Attendant Style!

  51. Derelict12:20 PM

    When you spend your days worshipping authority and praying for some Big Daddy figure to come along and vanquish all the enemies by whom you're surrounded, you'll grasp anything that tells you that authority figures (like pilots) are secretly on your side, while the serving class (like flight attendants) are all arrayed against you.

    I'll go back to my question of weeks ago: Why to conservative fantasies always center around the installation of an authoritarian government? Is it because they cannot get rational people to buy their arguments and thus feel like their agenda MUST be imposed from above?

  52. Around the LGM and Gin & Tacos blogs is a frequent commenter going by 'Major Kong' who is a commercial pilot and it seems really did fly B-52s for the USAF. He's had a lot to say about the usefulness of regulations and union rules in preventing (paraphrasing) "me being so fatigued that I plant 250,000 lbs of metal and kerosene in your front yard".

  53. Derelict12:22 PM

    There are plenty more female pilots these days. even as outrageously sexist a group at the USAF now has female fighter pilots (who, I might add, routinely kick the asses of their male counterparts in air-to-air combat).

  54. Jay B.12:36 PM

    I think all [f]light attendants assume everyone is Democrat,

    Yeah. That makes sense. I'm sure the Salt Lake to Dallas run is basically like fucking Woodstock.

    and I've just listened or I just stay busy, and they're angry, angry, but as I've gotten older, it's kind of when Bush was in, I gave 'em the international stop sign, I said, "Love Rumsfeld, voting' for Romney."

    And all I asked is if I could have the whole fucking can of Diet Coke.

    And talk about squelching any conversation for the rest of the 15 hours.

    There's something intrinsically funny about a woman who says "talk about the shunning!" Makes me laugh.

  55. RogerAiles1:07 PM

    I call bullshit.

    A real conservative would have called herself a stew.

  56. Another Kiwi1:24 PM

    Heed his voice from beyond the grave, heed it!

  57. zencomix1:25 PM

    The Mile High Club for Republicans means you go into the restroom alone and masturbate while repeating "Love Rumsfeld. Love Rummy, love him! voting for Romney. Love Romney", and sayin' it loud and sayin' it proud! And Dennis Miller's voice is in the back of your mind going "I think something's tectonically turned out there."

  58. tigrismus1:58 PM

    Gangway style...?

  59. Leeds man2:36 PM

    We have Bill Maher, who ties Miller for glib and facile, but at least seems to be sane, and capable of rudimentary analysis.

  60. So, we can expect that someday he'll be an obscure reference?

  61. Davis4:30 PM

    So Miller uses terms like "doll" and "dame"; who is he? Damon Runyan?

  62. MatthewMikell5:51 PM

    "Love Rummy!"

    I'm looking at all the major Republican players of the past couple of decades and wondering why Ms. Not-Really-A-Flight-Attendant seems locked on THAT particular clown.

    Then I realize she was probably glancing at the bottles on the trailer floor when she said it...

  63. Jerry Lewis isn't a pudgy Korean.

  64. AGoodQuestion5:58 PM

    Maybe because pilots give flight attendants orders, they think this makes them superior...

    This, this, a thousand times this! These people are, whatever antigovernment rhetoric they may spout, born authoritarians. The fact that pilots are the perceived top dogs makes their opinions worth much more than those peons who make sure the oxygen masks are working.

  65. AGoodQuestion6:01 PM

    I loved his "guy wants a rum and coke" suggestion. In real life you can just see this leading to a flight attendant bringing unwanted liquor to a guy in his second year of sobriety.

  66. AGoodQuestion6:03 PM

    Dennis Miller is still alive?

    As the ancient joke goes, if you can call that living.

  67. AGoodQuestion6:13 PM

    Colonel Jessup is the only Nicholson character I can think of who was that douchey.

  68. AGoodQuestion6:19 PM

    What he miss - and of course missing the point is his job - is that even if the word "squaw" doesn't bury you, the answer "squaw bury short cake" takes for granted the stereotype that Red man no speakum good. If one of my friends told me this joke I'd be embarrassed for him.

  69. AGoodQuestion6:22 PM

    Even in the nineties, when both of them were on the same pot-friendly glibertarian wavelength, Maher insulted my intelligence far less often.

  70. JennOfArk7:43 PM

    As the song went,
    "A Reunion flight attendant my oh my,
    You ain't nothin' but a waitress in the sky."

  71. Big_Bad_Bald_Bastard7:44 PM

    How about offering rum to a self-righteous Mormon who would then accuse her of hating religious people?

  72. Big_Bad_Bald_Bastard7:47 PM

    But... but... some smartass in yoga pants mouthed off to Amy Alkon!

  73. Big_Bad_Bald_Bastard7:52 PM

    He's a regular at Sadly, No! Time to get him to post comments here.

  74. Big_Bad_Bald_Bastard7:52 PM

    Some of them are so poorly paid, they need to take second jobs.

  75. Big_Bad_Bald_Bastard7:55 PM

    Kim Jong Air?

  76. Big_Bad_Bald_Bastard7:56 PM

    It's called The Washington Times, old chum.

  77. Big_Bad_Bald_Bastard8:02 PM

    That's part of it, but a bigger part of it is the assumption that they will gain power over the wimmins, the coloreds, and others they pereceive as inferior. It's just a major inferiority complex that they wish to assuage by shitting on the peons. They're like the bully's toadying sidekick, they want to get a kick in after the bully's knocked his victim to the ground. It's no mystery why the backlash was birthed in the sixties.

  78. Big_Bad_Bald_Bastard8:27 PM

    I feel like a dweeb replying to myself, but I'd like to add that, for the rank and file, it's about "aspirational authoritarianism", much like libertarianism is "aspirational capitalism", the real fat-cats love that sweet government cheddar.

  79. Fats Durston8:34 PM

    It's as if sexual inequality had to be established and maintained in airspace.

    Beyond awesome. And underwater? Well, what's long and hard and full of seamen?

  80. The Dark Avenger8:41 PM

    Miller's career is so dead, the Mormons want to baptize it.

  81. Malignant Bouffant9:50 PM

    Here's another tectonic turn, from The Daily Tucker (Really, why even link?):
    Madison Wickham, the co-founder of the Grandex media and commerce company, has noticed through sales of the company’s conservative-oriented clothing brand, Rowdy Gentleman, that young Republicans are more energized than ever in the run-up to Election Day.

    “There is definitely overwhelming support for Mitt Romney and the GOP among our customer base,” Wickham said in an interview with The Daily Caller. “Our political product offering stems from the idea that it’s hard to find cool right-leaning t-shirts and accessories. Companies like Urban Outfitters do a great job of catering to a young liberal niche, and in the same way our political products are geared towards a youthful right-leaning niche.”


    More topical “Romney for President” and “Mitt’s the Tits” t-shirts are also on offer.

    Read more: it, there's a damn autolink anyway.

    "Mitt's the Tits." Really, gentlemen?

  82. Hmm... sounds like the *Airline Stewardesses on a Plane* is the current iteration of the *Liberals at a Dinner Party* set piece wherein Conservatives crush their Liberal foes with slashing ripostes, les mots justes, and geometric logic. But if I may, I'd like to mention a scenario that Mrs. satch and I have encountered in our recent travels: a fair number of people, by way of starting a conversation, have asked us where we're from, and when we say Masachusetts, it's like an invitation to ask us who we're voting for. So far, when we say Obama, it's been about a wash on the number of people who agree with us vs the people who roll their eyes and look at us like we've sprouted a third eye. Being from MA gives us some real cache, however: we can speak with authority on how after four... er... make that about two and a half years of Romney's stewardship (before he decided he wanted to be president and basically said "See ya around, suckers", turned the keys to the governor's office over to Kerry Healy, and hit the campaign trail), Romney shouldn't be allowed anywhere near the White House.

  83. gainsayer10:40 PM

    Gotta be the hipsters being ironic, like wearing a "World's Greatest Grandpa" t-shirt.

  84. Another Kiwi11:46 PM

    Good point satch. This is why I felt that he should have picked Palin to run with. They could be wired up to generate electricity as they take office and then quit and then come back and then quit...

  85. smut clyde6:26 AM

    That is a weird conversation. The shorterised version seems to be "I knew those other people were Democrats because they were enjoying themselves, but I soon put a stop to their conversation with a few well-chosen words! That taught them!"

  86. smut clyde6:36 AM

    But I see a lot of signs.
    So do I, but I have been drinking Christmas Ale, so I know better than to make a fuss about it.

    I think something's tectonically turned out there.
    Tectonic? Like it's going to take 20 million years to make any difference? Bugger that for a game of soldiers.

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