GOLDEN BOY. Tom Tomorrow alerts me to Dr. Mrs. Ole Perfesser's latest, in which the eminent psychologist, documentarian, and non-tipping restaurant patron argues that liberals are mean to conservatives. We've heard this sort of thing many times before, often from Dr. Mrs. herself, but this time DMOP has picked herself a doozy of an exemplary victim: Jeff Goldstein.

Yes, that Jeff Goldstein (and this one), the belligerent proprietor of rightwing bile-shed Protein Wisdom. Goldstein is known for the viciousness of his own attacks on others -- including physical threats -- yet rightbloggers are accustomed to rally to his defense whenever liberals are mean to him.

I could never figure out why they're so protective of this bully, but I have a theory: Goldstein's always bragging on his academic credentials, so maybe the rightwing community, like any family that sees itself as coming up in the world, considers him their frail, schoolly child, and thus are prone to coddle him, and to be willfully oblivious of the fact that when he's not in his room studying he's out hitting the other kids in the back of the head with rocks.

DMOP's essay supports this theory. In this case the affront to Goldstein is even slighter than usual: He recently got a message from one of his former mentors, who requested that his name be removed from Goldstein's site. Goldstein, with his characteristic equanimity, described this as censorship. Goldstein's account is almost entirely rageaholic blargh-blargh, but DMOP, like an aggrieved parent, hears only her boychik's pain and sorrow:

Initially, Goldstein says he was hurt by his professor’s intolerant attitude, but then, his hurt rightly turned to anger.

Here I imagine Goldstein dressed up like the Mean Widdle Kid, peering from behind Dr. Mrs.' skirts and sticking out his tongue.

Inevitably it comes time for her to tell us that the boy is fine, it's those meddling social workers who are crazy. DMOP's reaction formation: Liberals are, like psychopaths, incapable of understanding the suffering of conservatives.

So just remember that next time a liberal treats you poorly, it may not be his or her fault. Like the psychopath who has no empathy for his fellow human being, liberals may have a blind spot when it comes to having any empathy or understanding for their conservative brethren. It often makes a psychopath worse to show empathy for him, as he will take advantage of it.

As that weird last sentence suggests, DMOP is ready to dish out prescriptions for the treatment of liberals -- but her aim is not to help the patients:

...expanding right-leaning media, getting more people involved, and making sure consequences are dealt out to those liberals who lie and treat conservatives with disrespect. Yes, this means all of us speaking up wherever we are when we hear false, inflammatory, or just plain mean remarks made about conservatives. And finally, clamoring for more diverse educational topics and literature in the schools and media would be helpful.

Conservatives shouldn’t back down on any of this, ever. For it is persistence and consistency that will eventually win the day.

From this it would seem that Dr. Mrs. Ole Perfesser is accustomed to practice on involuntary patients directed to her by the state, toward the end of neutralizing their threat to society, and that's also how she would like to deal with liberals who say mean things. If you were thinking of retreating to the Gulch with her, you should know that's the kind of libertarianism she believes in.